Hot Chicks with Douchebags: Friday Haiku

Friday, March 05, 2010

Friday Haiku

Spandex Rabbit Turd,
Gets Blair to fondle his nads,
In grade school rec room.

Turn your head and cough
You Rainbow bright Douchebag Fool
Nurse Cutie hates you.

- Douche Wayne

Ted's garb inspired by
Whitney Houston video
And grandpa's sock drawer

- Yahoo Scrotius

New Yankees uni
Will be worn for away games
Blair gives a cup check

- Vin Douchal

80's unitard.
American Apparel
You suck so badly.

- End the Haberdouchery

Jim Halpert clone lets
Karen feel his junk on new
show: "The Orifice."

- Bagnonymous

Angela answers,
When asked what his schlong feels like:
"A baby carrot."

- scrotum pole

First grade teacher Jen
Brings Douchebag to show-n-tell
Says 'Stay in School, Kids!'

-- Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

Technicolor Douche
In a pro-Wrestling Onesie
Yuck! No! Don't touch it!

- Pablo Sinatra

Susie cries with glee
at her first touch of a real
tiny mangina.

- Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche

Sadistic teacher
Plus swole tongued man-tard:
Sackless meat puppet.

- Captain Bringdown

# posted by Douchebag1 @ 7:02 AM

Comments:

Turn your head and cough
You Rainbow bright Douchebag Fool
Nurse Cutie hates you.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:06 AM

Technocolor Douche
Starts his yelp as Jen gives clamp
Its classroom justice

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:10 AM

Frat-bag Stage-1 Pledge
Trying to earn bros' "respect"
To the sea, lemming!

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:11 AM

She tutts his barreh,
Asbestos Flaygon cockk hold,
Like a tropical priest.

- 'Bagamemnon

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:11 AM

With a hearty laugh
She shows that nothing good comes
in small packages

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:13 AM

Piddle on the floor
From Jenny O's last main squeeze
Its 'milking the turds'

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:13 AM

Special Olympics
douche needs some adjustment to
get to starting line

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:15 AM

This black-socked douchebag
Has his small package sized up
Her fun/his dismay

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:16 AM

Technicolor Douche
In a pro-Wrestling Onesie
Yuck! No! Don't touch it!

# posted by

Pablo Sinatra : 7:16 AM

Yes, closet is full
Of mom's '80s cast off clothes
You can come out now

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:16 AM

Gender-confused Paul,
Asks Kim for reassurance
She can only laugh.

# posted by

Unknown : 7:17 AM

Pink and 'lectric blue
Do not help this here douchebag
A turd is a turd

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:19 AM

The only question:
When Kimmy squeezes his nuts,
Is there squeaky sound?

# posted by

Unknown : 7:19 AM

Eighties party, Yo
You be Daisy Duke, ok?
I'll be her tampon

# posted by

saulgoode42 : 7:19 AM

With a press of his
junk Alexandra could could get
his tongue to stay out

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:21 AM

You say "Unitard"
But the rest of us saying
"Uh no, dude, retard

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:21 AM

For Jill, it was fun
To find that pushing Steve's junk
Made their mouths open

# posted by

saulgoode42 : 7:22 AM

It's tough to look cool,
Whan wearing gay unitard,
Black socks do not help.

# posted by

Unknown : 7:22 AM

First grade teacher Jen
Brings Douchebag to show-n-tell
Says 'Stay in School, Kids!'

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:22 AM

Ring ring. Jane Fonda
is calling. She demands her
unitard back now

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:23 AM

Blair feels Douche package
You , sir, are no Lance Armstrong
At least he has ONE

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:24 AM

Could be 80s fest...
Two-thousand-eighty, after
the apocalypse.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:25 AM

Benjy Compson just
said that this douche makes him
feel a lot smarter.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:25 AM

Jen finds joyful glee
In Kurt's undersized package
Kurt only finds woe.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:25 AM

When I was in school,
My teacher always did this,
He was a Catholic priest.

# posted by

Unknown : 7:26 AM

there is no excuse
for this onesie. oh God, Blair,
don't grab his thingy.

# posted by

uscrascal : 7:26 AM

Vin Seven Two Four
I busted a nut myself
Gufawing at Lance

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:27 AM

With a touch of his
junk Blair he is hung like
kindergarteners.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:28 AM

I am a dumbass
for not reading my last one
need "knows' in line two

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:29 AM

In the wild, you
see this Bleeth open her maw
to receive 8 cockks.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:30 AM

Mom's yoga outfit
Dad's bad arch correction shoes
Look's like sis' won bet

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:30 AM

Susie cries with glee
at her first touch of a real
tiny mangina.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:31 AM

Little girl rainbow club
Gets visitor from the gym
He looks,feels girly.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:31 AM

That hint of white shows
just what happens when you put
pad on while drunk.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:32 AM

The shades are a nice
touch to the ensemble. Now
immolate yourself

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:33 AM

Sue shouts out surprise
That Tim's Junk's microscopic
He wants to run, hide.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:36 AM

Eighteen year old Jake
graduates from first grade now.
must be in the south.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:39 AM

Dunce Armstrong gets checked
For muscle enhancer use
Nope, no muscles here

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:42 AM

Yankee Rose outfit
sneaks in kindergarten class.
Molester, for sure.

# posted by

Bagnonymous : 7:43 AM

"It feels just like my
clitoris!" Blair squealed. Awkward
silence then followed.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:45 AM

i can't even write a haiku to that, it's wrong on so many levels, as my art history teacher would say, polymorphously perverse... i'm sure this slap-dick has some really cute frat story to excuse this, and nobody cares... unfortunately that's not true, cause somehow he still manages to get his bag fondled by a KKW hott, and therein lies the problem, it's at the point where this type of behavior is rewarded, society is doomed... i don't know if the Mayans have it right and the world is gonna' end in 2012, but looking at this pic makes me wonder if we'll even want to be here anymore by then

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:46 AM

Queerbag tucks it in
Brunette fingers cameltoe
I just barfed myself

# posted by

Bagnonymous : 7:47 AM

Ted's garb inspired by
Whitney Houston video
And grandpa's sock drawer

# posted by

Yahoo Scrotius : 7:47 AM

Susie's parents come
to pick her up from day school
She'll grow up a gun nut

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:47 AM

Blair leaves the crotch for
last when she finger-paints douche.
They don't squirm as much.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:48 AM

Jim Halpert clone lets
Karen feel his junk on new
show: "The Orifice."

# posted by

Bagnonymous : 7:50 AM

Midwest farm girl,
Knows he's wrong when he stated,
"I'm hung like a mule."

# posted by

Unknown : 7:50 AM

80's unitard.
American Apparel
You suck so badly.

# posted by

End the Haberdouchery : 7:50 AM

"Hey baby, get some,"
Said Stackhouse in his teen years,
Sis' can only laugh.

# posted by

Unknown : 7:53 AM

Blair's Special Ed De-
gree wasn't enough for No Douchebag Left Behind

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:54 AM

New Yankees uni
Will be worn for away games
Blair gives a cup check

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:54 AM

Pete, why the white shades?
He craves anonimity
Cause she laughs, 'Small Pete!'

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:55 AM

Blair plays hide the chalk
He plays beat the eraser
The kids all vomit

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:56 AM

Blair shows off her new
martial arts move--Underhand
Crotch-BLAM!--on douchebag.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:57 AM

Sadistic teacher
Plus swole tongued man-tard:
Sackless meat puppet.

# posted by

Captain Bringdown : 7:57 AM

In the off season
Matt Stafford likes to cycle
and help out the kids

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:57 AM

Hooter's new outfit
Should at least have been modeled
By big boob gal, no?

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:59 AM

The kids at PS
105 made Nick their bitch
His first teaching day

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:01 AM

Brett the Hitman Hart,
testicular atrophy...
Miss Elizabeth?

# posted by

Colussus of Choads : 8:02 AM

Toxic Avenger
Douche scores another blind girl.
Her hand will melt off.

Blair, that's not your job.
Don't treat handicapped like that.
He needs some math skills.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:03 AM

Michael Phelps sports the
Next Olympic swim uni
And new wide mouth bong.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:04 AM

Pete, why the long face?
Cause Jen shouted your small size?
Could be worse! Wait! No!

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:06 AM

Incoherent rant
Seven forty six AM
Not likely to win.

# posted by

WTF? : 8:06 AM

Stop teasing the 'tard.
He'll crush you with superstrength
Just like the rabbits.

# posted by

End the Haberdouchery : 8:06 AM

Scrotato haiku
About Stafford on a bike
Caused incontinence.

# posted by

End the Haberdouchery : 8:13 AM

Yay first page again!
Raises havoc at Douchal's
No breakfast 'til Eight

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 8:13 AM

Vin 7:24
White 7:45, 7:48
Scrotato 7:46

# posted by

Upon Further Review : 8:20 AM

Work foils me again;
no haiku for 'Sock today.
At least I have work......

# posted by

DarkSock : 9:00 AM

Douche Fairy grants wish;
her childhood Trapper Keeper
becomes a real boy.

# posted by

Hang Down Your Head, Tom Douchey : 9:19 AM

No better contrast
With day-glo unitard like
A pair of black socks

# posted by

ehcuodouche : 9:34 AM

DarkSock, Crucial arch-
itecting again? Is the
Recession over?

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:35 AM

Stimulous Package
Finally paying off. Yay!
Architects Rejoice!

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:37 AM

Hey its Matt Stafford!
Nuts on loan from Lions.
Laughs for size not style.

Frankfooter

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:55 AM

A bag of Pop Rocks
Goes *pop* *pop* *pop* in my mouth
Then fizzles in hand.

# posted by

Crosshair McDoucheson : 10:18 AM

This is so many
Flavors of pure, uncut Wrong
It makes my eyes bleed.

# posted by

Unknown : 10:24 AM

'Fraid not, Scrotato;
I see only more tunnel
Beyond this tunnel.

# posted by

DarkSock : 10:35 AM

Stimulus package
Made highway contractors rich;
The rest of us: Fucked.

Shovel ready? Peh.
Should have said "shovel worthy";
Because Haste Makes Waste.

# posted by

DarkSock : 10:37 AM

girls' short track reject
back to the short bus for you
methinks i smell poo

# posted by

Billy Jag : 10:51 AM

I hear you DarkSock
The shovels are better used
Bitch slapping congress

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:04 AM

Darksock is correct
Reidential homebuilders
Haven't worked in months.

# posted by

Unknown : 11:43 AM

no foul on this play,
roughness is necessary,
stafford douche gets sacked

# posted by

condouchious say... : 12:04 PM

Head of Stimulus
Package visits a classroom
Clothes and package FAIL

# posted by

Anonymous : 12:07 PM

Blair blights her future in academia after the whole world sees her molesting this 'tardbag. Where is this fags fixed gear bike? I'm calling hipsterbag.

# posted by

Douchamongus : 2:26 PM

A laughing woman
Wild eyed with voracious mouth
She cups his scrotum.

--VS

# posted by

Vinny Scumbaglia : 3:48 PM

Such is the reason
superintendents close schools
in bad economy.

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 7:59 PM

Unitard Onesie
acts the retard while Bunsy
gets lotsa funsie.

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:03 PM

Kindergarten was
never so colorful, nor
bad to the boner.

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:06 PM

"Pituitary
giantism in kids is
just in long bones, ma'am."

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:10 PM

Student teachers to-
day are on the short-end of
the economy.

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:14 PM

Pumpy's female al-
ter-ego is hard at work
in kindergarten.

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:25 PM

"Can you color the
blackboard pink, white and blue just
like his stretchy? YES!!"

# posted by

WhoopingCraneLover : 8:33 PM

"Susie" was their poor
victim. of what i'm not sure.
i don't want to know.

# posted by

Steve L. : 12:06 AM

wait

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:29 AM

for

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:29 AM

it.......

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:30 AM

100 BITCHES

# posted by

This mo'fo' : 6:31 AM

Ms. Blair shows us how
Prodding the perimeter
Is done on douchetards.

# posted by

Douche Mengia : 12:36 PM

First!!

# posted by

YES, THAT MUTHUFUCKA!!! : 3:08 PM

Friday, March 05, 2010

Friday Haiku

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