Yes!
 

She's the stripper girlfriend from my depraved teenage fantasies made real. It's like on Weird Science, but I never played with dolls with Anthony Micheal Hall.
 

I know Shiyen! Aren't these two bloated sacks of sh*t just the sweetest?
 

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I also like Asian chicks' butts. Wok this way.
 

Wow this chick is HOT and these 'bags are the real deal.
 

Gucci gloves, so thuggish.
 

Oddjob was never the same after that run in with 007.
 

Nithing says bad ass like an Ove' Glove.
 

Is turd stain on the right the schmuck from the Cartoonbags post?

And the last time we saw Tony, wasn't he throwing shoes at Austin Powers?
 

Personally, I prefer Bucky's welding glove.
 

The line outside the 'Swimming With Tilikum' exhibit grew restless, as they could hear the anguished moans coming from the creature's hungry belly.
 

^ The bad news is I've been virtually out of work since last November.
The good news?
There's a job opening in Orlando.
 

What the hell is up with T-Bone Chang's hand? Is this a Photoshop tutorial on textures?
 

The Buddha-Bag is draped in Fake Designer Gear is ridiculous
 

This just in--Scott Boras: Baseball Super Agent, has a smokin' hot daughter. Light douchebag activity in the link as well.
 

I know that guy! He went pee-pee in my Coke the other day! He thought it was funny.
 

Shiyen is really growing on me. And by "growing on me", I mean "giving me a turgid erection". I thought the first pic of her showed a bit of a fat ass, but this pic is much more flattering.

These two choads really inspire the ire. Especially tatted up douchewank on the right. I long to feel the hotness of my backhand after it contacts his face sharply.
 

she's a stripper!
 

I shall attack them with my Pikachu!
 

My oven mitts are way more bad ass than this. Medusa knows. I used them during our last session of "Hell's Kitchen" in the playpen. I still have grill marks on my ass from that one. And you wouldn't guess it, but Medusa can do a spot-on impression of Gordon Ramsay. Just with more leather and boobs.
 

"Just like Father Pat told me back when I was an altar boy," Tony continues.

Meanwhile, Oddjob's great grand nephew shows off his Louis Vuitton-clad Hamburger Helper sock puppet and his most ferocious hillbilly face. He looks like an Asian version of the guy who did Ned Beatty in Deliverance.

Shiyen is the aggressor here and all of Shin-Lii's incense can do nothing to staunch the stench of her shame.

How y'all bitches been doing?
 

Hey BVD! What a long strange trip it's been.

Mr. White is correct. It took months to get that throbbing vein in my forehead just right.

Holy crap, this guy is like an Oni in girl's clothes. Hard to get scared of that.
 

(snicker) You said "throbbing vein". That makes me think of mama, but then, so does your postage stamp, Medusa.
 

First Post here, long time reader.

She reminds me of my roommate in college in the late 90s. The douchebags remind me of the assholes she would "date". I spent a year in a dorm with her. Miserable bitch. This isn't her, my roommate had a smaller nose, but otherwise looked the same.

Spoke in a chinese accent, and say stupid stuff like "So I go Ratkeller and meet guys. They gimme drinks. They try to kiss, but I run away. Ha ha. They are stupid guys." And about once a month she would drag one of these morons back with her, and I would have to deal with them fucking in the next room.

"No come on face - no in eyes."

God I hated her. Now, me and my boyfriends would at least have the decency to not do it within earshot of anyone. And the bitch would give me shit about it.

"So you no fuck boys? You lezzee?"

"No, you stupid whore - I just do it when no one is around."

Good god she was miserable, and she wore WAY too much perfume. Stank like a Revlon factory.

Bitch got pregnant middle of second semester. Got an abortion, of course. didn't slow her shit down. Week later she was back at the Rat picking up shitheads.

She was an awful person.
 

After a satisfying fisting session with a blank Photoshop screen Oddjob celebrates by heading to the bar to boast with the gang over a round of Appletinis
 

@ Karen E.

I remember you...sorry about the racket.

I still can't believe your roommate terminated Little Sock...the cruel sow...
 

But to be fair who knew you could get pregnant through anal? I blame myself...I never should have let her use that strap-on on me.
 

I think I dated Karen Elliot's roommate.
 

I wish I dated Karen's roommate...my kinda girl :|
 

I wish I dated Karen's roommate's roommate. I got a boner right at "miserable bitch" and kept it 'til the very end. And by end I mean "spoke".
 

hows the lawsuit. hahahaha
 

She's a nottahot, and thats coming from a guy with full blown yellow fever.
 

She's a ninth-degree black belt in the Martial Art known as Nerducken.
 

I just watched the Olympic ladies' figure skating. She scored herself a double yutz.
 

@ Karen Elliot

What a delightful anecdote! I do hope you will submit it to the "Life In These United States" section of Reader's Digest.

But yeah, I know the male counterpart of this, and the best part is having to use the bathroom in the morning after the roommate has used it for a night shower-based 'passion' with whomever or whatever got picked up last night. Made me wish for a firehose connected to a truck full of bleach.
 

Karen gives me an feature idea for the new site, Douche Reports: Confessions of a Bleeth. We could have little missives like this as seen from the other side...
 

They got the roid rage. The hemorrhoid rage.
 

Good lord, it's that short arm guy again. And what's with the Michael Jackson prop glove?
 

Good lord, it's that short arm guy again. And what's with the Michael Jackson prop glove?
 

Good lord, it's that short arm guy again. And what's with the Michael Jackson prop glove?
 

Good lord, it's that short arm guy again. And what's with the Michael Jackson prop glove?
 

Good lord, it's that short arm guy again. And what's with the Michael Jackson prop glove?
 

Yep, that's definitely the douche from "Cartoonbags".

There's really nothing else to say, just ask Mack DaNozzle, tattooing your face gets you an immediate pass to the monthly.

And a lifetime gig fixing cars.
 

Dammit Whoop-Di take your
seizure medicine!
 

^ You take your medicine you sumbitch!




Wait.

What?

I blacked out, what happened?
 

Shiyen for Harr of Hott.
 

I want Shiren to tuts my barreh like a tropical priest. And how could anyone NOT want to rape those thighs??

I apologize to my friend Troy, but dude, it's a medical fact.
 

Smoove man, smoove.
 

As long as you don't flagoyan her asbestos.

Because that's just over the line.
 

Is it me or do the female curling contestants have a MILF thing going on?
 

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if there's anything i can say about how well Asian cougars grow into their age, it's this: Shiyen's mother could be hotter than Shiyen herself.
 

The BuddhaBag looks like a broke-down Asian Rick Ross.
 

Is the Tatt/MMA/URC douche holding a pink carnation or is it on his sister's t-shirt that he borrowed to wear to asian whore night at the club? How did his hair grow so fast since the last picture he was in with Cartoonbags?

Can you qualify for DB of the week by being a supporting character in a picture? Is that a tear tatted under his eye or yet another stray section of facial hair?
 

its the little bit of cellulite on her inner thigh that makes it look that mugh more revealing...if chicks learn that type of stuff drives us nuts, we are dead...but with a hard-on so it won't be all bad
 

@Crucial:

You wrote:

And how could anyone NOT want to rape those thighs??

Arooo? Why think forcible when mutual play is so much better. She's into it, and you get to go all animal. Everyone's happy.

Rape? Bad and Evil.

Have crazy monkey sex with crazy monkey girl? Good. Very good. Been there, done that, we both had (a little too much) fun.

Remember, the flesh is weak and the bleeth is willing - no need for being mean. Fun is where the fair's at, companero.
 

@Karen Elliot -

Lucky you didn't spend half your time at a "band house".

Now THAT was a scene of bacchanalia and debauchery that would make Dionysius himself flip out and go into rehab.
 

^^ What Troy said. Especially about using force.

At my college, being in band meant that you graduated a virgin, even if you didn't enter that way. They saved their drinking for game days. During the week they had White Castle eating contests. I don't know what's worse: roommate keeping you with inconsiderate loud fucking or or roommate keeping you up with inconsiderate loud farting.

Of course, for some, it's the same thing.
 

@Spiny:

I was talking about a Rock 'n' Roll band house. You know where the band memebers all live together and you can party and sleep o nthe floor and get the crabs and not mind because you...you will be stoned off your ass and maintain a psychedelic gleam in your eye at all times, and if you hang out enough you can be a roady or something and pick up the also rans the guitarist (it's ALWAYS the guitarist who scores the babes) didn't want, which is fine because skeezy chix who are ready and willing are better than none at all.

At least, that's how it worked at every band house I ever knew...
 

Oops.... I was on an uber-geek campus

Whaddya expect in Jersey?
 

It's uncanny how this fellow on the right resembles...wait a minute...is that...Mayor Tony Roswarski of Lafayette, Indiana?
 

the second bag is the same guy from the cartoonbags