That's hilarious.
 

Am I right in my observation that he has a prostitute on his side, of course only a few inches away from Jesus?

I know that Jesus was into the whole brevity thing, "let he who has not sin cast the first stone," so on and so forth.

But a hooker?

Next to Jesus?

And the hooker is wearing a bleeth hoodie?

And jesus is your gramps?

Something is very very sinister here and I just can't put my finer on it. It's akin to when the creepy music starts playing ever louder in a horror film. And you start to wonder, "How much more fucking tension can they build? Just show me the god damn monster already."

And then the music just stops, and you think, "Oh, false alarm, coast is clear."





Then, "BAM! AAAHHH, face ripped off by mutant gnomes." And you scream at the movie, "You fucking pricks! I felt safe! I showed you my vulnerable side and you stabbed me right in the nuts!"

That's kinda what this pud has done to religious symbols.... And beer... And hats... And skin.
 

@ Sergeant Scrote Stain

Umm, yeah, about being shocked to find Jesus in close proximity to a prostitute...I think, umm, you missed a week or 500 of Sunday school.
 

I don't know, maybe it's because I've had a few long days at work this week, but I can't summon the hate for this dude.

I give a Notta'...
 

This is very scriptual, remember when Jesus turned the water into Budwieser?
 

Jesus was married.

to THE prostitute.

and their descendents ended up in Guido Beach.

it says so somewhere in all of the massive clusterfuck of holy and unholy texts.
 

@ Massengill

What the fuck is Sunday School?

And yes, I understand, Jesus spoke to the poor, healed the weak, washed the feet of prostitutes, praised beggers, and spent his time with those that the upper classes routinely spin upon. And this example is why Mother Teressa devoted her life to helping the prostitutes of Calcutta.

But a tattoo that supposedly commemorates the heavenly resting of your "beloved" grandfather should probably be more than a few inches away from a rendition of that girl your fucked while visiting Chico State on Labor Day as a sophomore at Sacramento State (which was 14 years ago).

But I have been wrong before.
 

If one is to presume that he's religious and honoring his "grandpa" with his torso ink then why is the tat on the left side of his abdomen, which looks to me like a representation of the Virgin Mary, staring towards his groin?

May Sister Millicent Discipline beat him with a yardstick for his blasphemy... and then confine the bleeth in the nunnery.
 

So, so wrong.
 

Is that the Ghostbuster logo tattoed on his arm?
 

I think I’m beginning to understand the dark secret to the appeal this website. Witty banter aside, why is that so many guys flock to this site to trash talk douches and worship the goddesses that hang with them? You don’t need to look any further than your average porno to see hotties with douches and I’ll bet you a grill cheese sandwich that that’s the type of porno you guys are into.
Hate to shine the light of introspection on y’all but why is it that these pictures can simultaneously make you want to gag, punch faces, and hang yourself and yet you keep coming back for more punishment?
My theory ties into evolutionary psychology. Our ancestors pined away for the young fertile hotties that hang from the arms of the alpha douches. Every once in a while one of these proto-douche-enviers would challenge a scrote to a fight. To the victor, the spoils. To the loser, the shame of debasement. Enter the age of the internet. Now modern day douche hater can sit in the safe seclusion of a suburban basement and gleefully mock the same alpha douches without the fear of asskickery. Anonymity has once again thrown a wrench in the gears of social norms.

By the way, even a clever douche related user name is still anonymous.
 

The hott is undressing me with her eyes. But the joke's on her for I am a non-nudist...
 

@Anon 5:37

I can't speak for the rest of the gang but I'm into Hotties with goat-ies...
 

I'm into hotties with grandpa jesus tatts.
 

That's MISTER Jebus to you mofo.
 

Did an anonymous person just rip us for being anonymous?

He should ask the Jesus tatt what he thinks about hypocrisy.

I smell like turkey bacon and the inside of Shaq's sneaker.
 

Ahem, yes, I do love grilled cheese porno. Especially the ones where the two week old grilled cheese falls out of the folds of a large big ol' booty broad. MMMMM....tasty goodness with a side of sweaty penicillin.

...ok I'm back and my balls are empty...allow me to enlighten the psychological musings of our anon friend here.

We live in a different world now. Where Alpha males can no longer just engage in "asskickery" to obtain the hott. Because then they will be thrown in jail, and the loser will get the spoils, as well as the Alpha's house, car, and depending on the severity of the beating, his entire worldy goods. Also, the Alpha male will most likely lose his hott to the "loser" of said "asskickery".

And most likely it will be videotaped and used as evidence against the Alpha as indisputable proof that he indeed assaulted the "loser".

So, the Alpha, in order to regain his dominance, has resorted to such obnoxious buffoonery as wearing a giant faux hawk, unearned dog tags, wearing ridiculously expensive t-shirts, popping his collar, mandanas, wristdanas, and copious amounts of perfumed body sprays..etc.

This peacockery is now being mocked and regarded as totally fucking douchey...and again, the Alpha bags must reinvent themselves. We are here to help the 'bag realize the scrotologicality of his ways, and perhaps enlighten the hotts to turn away such choadwanks and go after the "losers" who do things like read books and shit.

We are the future. Deal with it, or fuck off.
 

I'm into plucking the sand out of Holly Hott's biznooch, with my tongue
 

I'm into plucking the pubes from Holly Hott's biznooch out from betwixt my teef,
with Frank Zappa Brand Montana Dennil Floss, Picked From Union-Only Bushes! ©
 

What JCVD said. Yeah. What he said.
 

@jcvd

Well said, and I add this further facet: Modern society almost forces the douche, when you think about it. Technology has progressed to the point of all but eliminating any physical advantage the former alpha douche might have over the "loser." Having biceps that are 3" larger in diameter does little to stop a crossbow bolt, a bullet, or the nail on a board with a nail in it. So now that all of the time the Alpha Douche spent in the Caveman Gym trying to perfect his Neandrath-abs was wasted, as it is of no practical use, what to do? How can one maintain one's alpha status?

This is where things go horribly wrong: For lack of a better idea--and mostly due to stupidity--the Alpha Douche puts that energy into the plumage that JCVD already described. It's an evolutionary side street in a Darwinian Williamsburg, i.e., pointless, misguided, and soon to fall into disrepair and, ultimately, oblivion.



An alternate theory: The motherfuckas on this site make me laugh, and I try to add my own small contribution. So perhaps asshat anons shouldn't take shit so seriously.
 

Everyone's getting too existential for my.

Back to basics. We've got a guy with multiple tatfs, the most significant one of "Grandpa". And don't forget the 3 foot long tatt under his left arm.

We are looking at a douchebag. Plain and simple.
 

me, not my.
 

tatfs? is my keyboard hosed?
 

From the First Book of Anonymous, Chapter 60, Verse 9, and it was written:

"Enter the age of the internet. Now modern day douche hater can sit in the safe seclusion of a suburban basement and gleefully mock the same alpha douches without the fear of asskickery."

Hallelujah! Is it coincidence that Anonymous would deign to preach to us on the very thread dedicated to our savior?

I say nay, nay I say! For this truly must be the Second Coming of the tattoo of Christ. Rise Terry and puff out our great savior. From your nipple will sound the trumpets heralding the End Days, the great Crapture and Crapocolypse! The Day of the Douche Hater is now!


Sweet, right?
 

Fuck! I've been drunk so long I forgot the pass to my blogger account! Tarmal!

Anyhoo this his and his bud pair aren't fooling me one bit! That has got to be one of the hottest up-tucking, dong tapers I've ever seen in my life! So Granpa83 suck down a couple o more frothy barley sodas and double wrap it before you stuff it in to m-butterfly's um er hershey vagina k?

Oh and fuck you k? I'm drunk
 

now playing : Zum Tier Machen by Einsturzende Neubauten. So, like, what he said. I just finished my second vodka tomic. So, like wow. All the samall glasses were in the machine, so all I had wer ethese British pint glasses and now I'm fucking hammere.d

Now Im listening to Glenn Gould play Bach.

This fuckwit sporting the Jesus tatt is a moron.

So, if his Gramps was Jebus, then this tool was probably bor n in 45AD, which makes him almost 2000 fucking years old. I know this because they didn't wear baseball caps at 45 degree tilt back then, so this had to have been taken recently, historically speaking.

Now playing: Under the Milky WAy by The Church

Fuck - is she the Messalina to his Claudius or is he Gaius Silius cuckolding some other douchie claudius outside the picture.

Fuck - why would I remember that crap? I just went to pee and I fuckig nbumped into the damn door, but I can remember the wives of Claudius? Too much PBS ot a brain filed with too much crap?

Fuck I can't even type straight...

Let the viewers decide...

He's drimking budweiser because he's a man's man.

She's drinking Bud Lite to keep her girlish figure.

They both smell like chicken souop.

Now playing: One More Trauma by Slow Children.

And that's what these two fucks are - slow children. denizens of the short bus.

People who if said Claudius would think you're talking about some new STD. Talk to them about the economic collapse of the thrid century, and they're like " What?"

Stupid fucks.

The sky is barely lit
It's too dark to decipher it
And I don;t think anythin g can change that.

The place is moving...
One more trauma
one more or one less
What is that?

These two fcuks are trauma. They are an open ooozing sore on the ankle of humanity.

They are the palliative of of nausea - the world excretes poison through their existence, they are like infected pimples. And it's not like they're the worlst Like Metaphyiscal hoolicgan and carly or evern what's his face - Droopy - these fucks are jsut dreary boring thrid rate pieces of shit floating in the toilet bowels of modern idiocy we call "culture". They think they have lives, but they don't. They are the automatons of a denatured and collapsing holocaust, the thoughtless beneficiaries of ecocide.

Right now I am listening to Elephants play the first movemt of Beethoven's Pastorale Symphnoy...

Yes, fucking elephants. Elephonic rhapsodies. Deal.

Who needs von Karajan, when I can hear ELEPHANTS play BEETHOVEN!!!!

Man I need another drink... back in a fwew..


Damn I am totoallyl trashed. Yum. With Pletnev banging away at Scarlatti's keyboard sonata in Dmaj 214. Talk to these two about Scarlaatti they think it's a fucking fever. These fuckers wouldn't know Tarkovsky if he rose fro mthe fucking grave and fucked them both in the ass at the same time. Hec ould do that because he was greater than Samurai scrote.

oh - phone call... aqua... gotta go.
 

this pairing isn't bad at all compared to what our retinas are usually raped with....

but TT thunderously answers anon's query for our reason for being....

"these fucks are jsut dreary boring thrid rate pieces of shit floating in the toilet bowels of modern idiocy we call "culture".....They are the automatons of a denatured and collapsing holocaust, the thoughtless beneficiaries of ecocide."

wow. well played sir. it's the brilliant insights of the regs that help me feel some sanity and solidarity in these, the last days.
 

That's just plain funny, and I'm an old school Irish Catholic.

How awkward is it when you are screwing some broad and she's reminded constantly that not only is the baby Jesus watching her sin her hot little butt off, but she's watching him back.

Creepy.
 

@ anon 5:37 PM

yeah, what JCVD & Mr. White said. I come here for laughs, with like-minded folk, at the expense of muscle bound twits with Kanye-size egos and tic-tac sized dicks. It's a common presumption that the comments on this site are spawned by envy; I assure you that all of us except DB1 and ŁŁAMMAHH are very successful "losers" that survived nerd status in High School only to wind up marrying the head cheerleader (literally in my case); I wouldn't trade anything with these goobers.

But having said that, THANK YOU for being the rare anon that poses a serious well written challenge to our raison d'être instead of saying we live in our mother's basements, which is only true in Vin's, Croosh's and White's cases. Maybe Wheezer as well. Not me though; I got the guest room.

Lighten up,get a blogger account and handle, and let's enjoy a cruel laugh at the expense of a random peacock with a room tempurature IQ.
 

(((((((BŁÆāHhh!!!)))))))€

THÄT ŠÜMBÏTÇH ÆTË Å DÃMN HÏPPĮĘ!!!!!11!!
 

Ahhhh, I am sorry but I just can't get over Pamela's abs. They are like crack and I need help.
 

@ Darksock^

He didn't say "mother's basements". But he did say "Now modern day douche hater can sit in the safe seclusion of a suburban basement and gleefully mock the same alpha douches without the fear of asskickery."

For the record, I am typing this on the second floor of a building in an area that has enough population to legally be called a city.

For the B-side of same record, that's me in the photo avatar. I get horny looking at myself, or chicks who look like me. No, not really. I just have no shame. A good portion of the regs, through no major detective work, have been able to find me as I pretty much link to myself from here. so it really isn't hard to find me.

So, I'm not really hiding behind much of anything. I'm here for tow reasons:

1. It's funny
2. I'm waiting for something else to happen (some work to come in for me, dryer to finish, cake to bake, etc.)

So, as you can see, I'm a chick, and about the only one on here these days. So I'm not here to ogle hot chicks, there are sites for that which cater more to my tastes. Orange women with plastic fingernails make me gag. And, I feel the same way about the douchebags on here. Therefore, my dole intention is to laugh, and then to mock.

No, I don't fear asskickery. I have been threatened numerous times with ass-kickings from dudes for various things, and not one of them actually followed through. Even if Donkey Douche himself was standing here threatening me with a pounding, I wouldn't bat an eye until he actually did something. And I by then, I would have told him the same thing I told the others: "Go ahead and hit me, you have my permission. But you better make it a good one. You better knock me out cold and then run for the hills. Because if I see you when I wake up, I will shoot you so many times, you'll have to have a closed casket. And I'll be happy to go to prison. 'Cause a woman who goes to prison for killing a man who beat her is treated like a fucking GOD in gen-pop."


Maybe that's why I never actually got hit after I got threatened.
 

Forgot to proofread. Sorry.
 

Hey Medusa! I also get horny looking at you. Go figure, who knew we had so much in common?
 

I missed the basement reference....stupid Lortab...

...mmmmm Lortab.
 

i say "notta"... though i put a lot of emphasis on facial expressions and adouchements.

This dude just seems like a normal guy from South Jersey or Philly with a few bad tats.
 

@ DarkSock.


I married the queen of the jocks not the head cheerleader ( the old lady lettered in softball, tennis and basketball).

I only banged a cheerleader while in high school. Without a rubber, too, fuckers. It was the '70's and they handed out birth control pills like they were M&M's.




mmmmmmm .... M&M's
 

Also there is not, so far as I am aware, another site on the intertubes that addresses the issue of peeing in the butts of others/horses.

I've not bothered to Google it, but still.
 

I don't think that even Jack Kirby could come up with a design to cover up that tattoo when Terry's embarassment reaches a crisis point
 

I'm calling nottadouche on this one... he really doesn't show any outright signs, save the sideways hat, and that's not that extreme anyway.
 

So, Stone Temple Pilots playing here in October...

Do I see them locally , here at the casino in San Bernardino or go to Stateline and see them in Vegas?


Local show would mean minimal partying and having to wake up to the family the next day..



Nevada means getting fucked up before, during and after the show with the dudes in my band, playing craps until the sun comes up and waking up at the pool, covered in creasote, tree bark, lemming droppings and M&M wrappers with pockets full of green and black chips and a hangover the size of Hourglass' hips...


A perplexing conundrum ..
 

Awe c'mon guys, you're all married to big fat pigs and you know it; I know it; and "Lesbian Thermos" damn well knows it.

Let's all just drink another beer and continue mocking.

Thank you.
 

If you're really bored, or hammered on vodka (Troy) then for shits and giggles type in google "I peed in a horse once" (with quotation marks) and you'll see where darksock's been haunting recently...

Vin: I got 4 VIP tix to the Biloxi Hard Rock STP show December 29th; are you willing to fuck up to the point of waking up in jail/stranded on an island with a smashed boat?

4 tix were $1,000; I'd better be sitting on stage handing Scott his smack syringes.
 

Except for me... though she's had two kids, my ol' lady be tighter than a mole's ear stretched over Neil Peart's bass drum.
 

@ anon 5:37
that's one thing that i absolutely can not stand about porn.

also, you're betting us sandwiches that something something and we want to use the internet to win over these 'bags hotts and there's a wrench in social norms(?!?) because people are posting anonymously and something something. tell me. how do you type while wearing a straitjacket?

p.s.-what everyone else said, compounded with every other comment ever posted on this site with the exception of the samurai scrote thread. you don't deserve to read that thread, never mind understand it or have it hurled at you by myselfor anyone else. and by hurled i mean with a catapult, and by myself i mean myself's. poop.

sticks. and. stones. douche. bag.
 

Y'all ain't right, not a damn one of u
 

if this was a real fight, then "Lesbian Thermos" Ernie Tubesock would be Evander Holyfield and Anon 5:37 would be Mike Tyson.

if you can't kick ass yourself, biting or posting anonymously doesn't solve anything.

and i actually don't know all that much about boxing.
 

This wanker goes to confession and the priest says that instead of him needing to say 20 Hail Marys and 30 Our Fathers, he can tatt the equivalents onto his torso.

So he gets the Our Father Grandpa tatt, sort of like the Old Testament version of "God the old man in the sky "(and his birth and death dates included) the Jesus tatt for the Son; and in his hand he holds The Holy Spirit of grain alcohol.

And if that IS a Ghostbusters tatt on his right upper arm, we know it's looking for the Holy Ghost himself, and not his yeasty beer-version.

He's got the Hail Holy Mary Mother of God tatt on his side torso.

By his side he also has an anima or she-goddess, who could be equally as definitive as the Holy Mother; holding the Bud Light in the blue can, blue being the symbol of Our Lady as depicted in religious art. Yes, blue is her sacred color.

Which brings me to Blue Laws. Which are sorely needed these days to help us deal with exposed bad tatt art.
 

@ Anon 5:37,

I may be a nerd, but I've done pretty well for myself. I married the head Guard at the Women's Correctional Facility,(eat your heart out Dark Sock), and I have probably the finest double wide in the entire Lazy Acres Mobile Home Court. If one of these alpha-douches wants a piece of me, my old lady will kick his ass.
 

@Pontius Pilates 10:45

I certainly do not know it, for I am dating a mammoth of a woman. She makes a fat pig look like a praying mantis. She makes Rosie O'Donnell look like Natalie Portman.

For the record, I was spawned due to the unconventional pairing of a mystical yak and a lightly slathered in mustard turkey sandwich. With that said, biting my ear Mike Tyson style would probably be "very tasty".

Now on to this picture, that's not Jesus. It's wrestling great Dutch Mantell, who is not dead by the way. That's his grandson, Bobby. That kid has the IQ of a patchwork quilt; once, Dutch sees that, I guarantee that his will piledrive that weasel through dad's coffee table.

Wick

I hate football and the smell of loose change.
 

@Anon @ 5:37,
Nice troll post.

@ everyone who responded to Anon @ 5:37,
don't feed the trolls. If someone feels the need to berate us or call us nerds I think we have to brush that off. By being defensive we simply let the troller/flamer know (s)he touched a nerve. Never forget: mockery begets mockery.

And yes, I do see the irony to responding to a troll post in a post about not responding to a troll post.
 

This photo reminds me of the great tune by Hayes Carll


She Left Me For Jesus
 

i have a headache.
 

So if his grandpa was Jesus does that make this ass clown The Son or The Holy Spirit? Either way, the Apocalypse is about to start. Is that Slayer in the background playing "Raining Blood"? I guess that is why I don't follow any organized religion. Pastafarians unite!
 

@ Troy

That's okay; no pain, no gain.

though I prefer no pain, no pain.
 

Just one of the priests and one of the nuns on a secret holiday at an undisclosed location.

Sort of like Thorn Birds, douche-style.
 

Well, just as a bit of info. I check out this site daily. I live in a cute house in suburbia. I'm an average middle aged, middle class happily married gal. I just hate douchebags.
 

his grandpa is jesus?
 

"Far be it for me to make fun of a memorial tattoo"

Fine, I'll do it. They're lame. If you want to remember someone buy a picture, make a donation to charity, or light a candle.
 

What would grandpa say?
 

Grandpa must be turning over in his grave
 

I'm Terry, and I just shit on Grandpa's grave! I'm a bag!