Is that the All-knowing Trash Heap from Fraggle Rock?

I see Gunge in the middle.

Where's Philo?

Those hots are not hots.

Marjory, can you explain a way for the Fraggles to get Junior Gorg to thump that douche on the head?
 

It's a very rare and special candy: A pooty-tang cluster with a soft poo-ey center.
 

The Vaginal Reactor threatened to reach Critical Ass, so the scientists quickly inserted a douche-rod to bring the core back down to safe levels of hottness.
 

I got nothing...
 

The girls couldn't have made their Jabba the Slut tribute if Lance hadn't volunteered to play the part of Salacious Butt-Crumb.


Damn. I guess I am a shameless nerd.
 

At that moment, the phrase "I feel like I’m being eaten by
a thousand million shivering furry holes" sprang into Robert Smith's mind and he smiled in triumph; the lyrics to "Lullaby" were finished.
 

"No way's all these bitches fitting into my red suitcase..."
 

A muffled barely audible voice suddenly came from below the pile of bodies: "I'm happy for you, and I'ma let you finish, but Ron Jeremy has the best gangbangs ever..."
 

We're seeing more of these choads smiling in these pics, so perhaps we're winning on that front. No, that doesn't really do me any good since the ladies aren't grouping around me, but "oh well."

But his "hair" is bothersome, and I really hope there are an assload of stitches underneath that watch and what looks like a bandage/wristband. And then there's that landing strip on his chin, and the indoors shades. Your future ain't quite that bright, Mr. Stage-2.
 

Not for nothing, but I think those are lutes.
 

Jane of the Jungle on the left has a dress that reminds me of a furry leopard pelt. And his chin pubes remind me of the hair on a monkey tail... specifically the part right under the butt hole.
 

A thousand years later this bedsheet would become known as "The Shroud of Turdin'".
 

Todd smiled; it WAS literally more poon than he could shake his stick at.
 

He is wearing the shades to keep his eyes from bulging out of his sockets. He is smiling and pleased with his fortunate situation. If this is a douche bags natural habitat then I want to be as big a douche as this guy. I am really going to have to step up my game. Thank you DB1 for keeping me posted on all the new d-bag trends. I personally have no imagination for accessories. I can, however, imagine a few scenarios with this group of hotts. Douche on fellow douchers
 

i see you, blondie on the front right, with your sheer black nighty and sweet innocent smile.

you are in the proper calm submissive state for us to make great progress.

i rehabilitate douches, i train hotts.

i am the douche whisperer.
 

how did this guy get to be this lucky. I am jealous.
 

Now that's a douche.

He made a decision long ago that he would go to any length to find out what that "intercourse" thing was that his friends constantly talked about.

He knowingly and willingly paid for those highlights, feminine sunglasses, pointlessly large watch, Mach 12 clippers to attain the perfect chin pubbery, and stupidly vibrant T-shirt. He would stop at nothing.

He WAS going to get laid, damn the pride, damn the expense, and god damn the individuality.

Well Tad, at least you have succeeded in one thing, you have transformed yourself into the choadiest scrote this side of Cal State Dominguez Hills. Rejoice in you accomplishment you festering turd.



I said rejoice god damn it.





You still won't get laid though. Yes, you have attained douchiry, but latent homosexuality is a mother fucker to overcome.
 

And thus Tad the vibrator delivery boy was never seen or heard from again...
 

I can't seem to get my watch fastened over my mandanna. I couldn't find a sweat band. This might work with a leather band watch though.
 

Somewhat off-topic.....

Did anyone else watch the Steelers-Bears game? Renowned douchebag Jeff Reed missed two field goals in the fourth quarter, helping the Bears have a chance to come back and win 17-14 on a late field goal by Robbie Gould. As an added bonus, though it was raining at the game, Troll-Boy seemed to be blubbering a little bit.
 

mixed bag? must be nice to be a famous author with the pussy just raining down.

maybe i've been on the road too long with my job, but i see about six 9s, an 8 and a 7 among the 0.0.

Coiffed, drunk and douchey is no way to go through life, son.
 

This comment thread had more wins than.....than.....Damnit. This thread was so awesome, I can't even think of anything awesome to say how awesome it is.
 

Them's not ukuleles.

Them's lutes.
 

@ Medusa

In a thread of such awesomeness, you say, "I want to pilfer leopard dressed hott's erotic cravasses like Crucial dives for rectally located boxes of nerds."

Or something of the like.

Time to get blunted and watch Sunday Night Football. Go in peace baghunters.
 

I had an epiphany once, but I really can't remember why.


I vaguely recall it having something to do with some bad acid, a loaf of raisin bread and a parking meter.
 

This thread has more WIN than this douche has glitter makeup.
 

@ Medusa 5:07 PM

y'know, last time we had a douchebag crushed by a gaggle of hotts on a fucking bed, it nearly caused a meltdown in baghunter morale (read the first 2 or 3 comments).

so i'm glad we've come a long way since then.

the world needs more ukulele whackings of douchebags. and more hotties dressed in sheer black nighties (damnit Douche Whisperer laid first claim to her).
 

"That night the sorority gathered to celebrate Todds' coming out of the closet. However, Todd's repeated attempts to "get into Kelly's leopard print dress" were finally interpreted correctly. With his latent heterosexuality laid bare, he was quickly subdued and forced into a mid-sized piece of luggage and thrown onto a local freeway."
 

It's MANDARINS, people.

Mandarins.


And someone call fuckin' Orkin.

We got a shitload of crabs again.
 

@ Squash - Mandolins?

Upon closer inspection, I think it is a depiction of a variety of stringed instruments. The first appears to be a mandolin, the second a viola, and the one on the far right is a lute. I could be wrong though. I'm no Martin-certified Luthier.








Wow. that pun came outta nowhere...
 

This is Samürai Scrøte's version of Turducken.
 

"Is it Live, or is it Mammarex?"



heh
 

The only reason the girls swarmed around Max was because he had a lot of Lute.










sorry....
 

As the sole warlock in this group of witches, Phaedrus was responsible for putting a lot of buns in the Coven...
 

The new 9-seater Sybian was a smash success.
 

Why is it so hard to get the number of hot dogs and buns to match up?
 

The audio portion of tonight's episode of HCwDB is presented in Dolby 9.1 Poon-Around (9 channels of mono with 1 sub-fluffer channel).
 

Arthur's Momma told him if he ever got in bed with loose women he'd turn to stone....and he could feel it starting to happen already.

Luckily he'd thought ahead and wore his steel chastity underwear.

The next morning's headlines read "9 LOCAL GIRLS MAIMED BY SHRAPNEL!"**



**apologies to Bud Fletcher
 

As they all settled in to sit, watch and wait to see who would be the first to lose the bet, Todd immediately regretted selecting "Cinnamon Red Hots" as his flavor of Nerds to insert rectally.
 

Yo Dawg, we herd you like bitches so we put girls in yo girls so you can fuck when you fuck.
 

I meant "Xzibit" not Xhibit

damn that's more wack than the chess club president saying he's down with Doctor Dray and Snoopie Dog...

stupid ambien
 

When the Hotel's Concierge called up from the lobby to see if his newly arrived V.I.P. from Berlin desired any call girls for female companionship that night, Günther (who was gay) shouted "Nein, nein!".

The Concierge muttered to himself "greedy kraut bastard" and then sent their asses on up...
 

And Sock brings the anal nerds at 9:21.








Exaclty 128 minutes after I excepted it. Suppose you're going to blame that on Ambien too?
 

I figured this would be a "where's waldouche" picture.
 

^ "Where's Waldo-Closetbag" is probably more appropriate.
 

Let me be at least the third person to say that is a framed picture of lutes, and some other stringed instruments, at least one being a viol, violin or viola. I'm thinking: antique instruments.

That stated, who'd bother framing and then HANGING such a picture in just any old hotel room? It must be a place where classical musicians frequent.

That said, he must be a soloist star of sorts, and they the adoring female posse in possession of the moment.

That, or sorority rush has gotten more complicated than ever. And say,what's Amanda Overmeyer doin' at the top middle of this pic?
 

I blame it on Dirk Benedict.
 

drakscok @9:24 & 9:28 = street cred fail.
 

Orgies. Who hasn't fantasized about being in an orgy? Not the porno two guys-three girls orgy, but the "You and more vaginas than you can count" orgy. The kind where you have to step up to the plate and represent every man that has ever had a hardon. And in your fantasy you give it everything you've got. Dick, tongue, hands, Hell even your feet. You are the maestro conducting a symphony of pussy and it is Beethoven's F*cking Ninth in all its "Alex Delarge" glory. Because, if and when the fates align and you find yourself surrounded by beautiful women, about to experience the penultimate in sexual gratification, you will not waste that moment, you will not let it pass you by. You will rise up, all five-and-a-half inches of you, and make it an evening these women will look back on and long to repeat until the day they die.

So when that moment comes, as it has for our douchebag, will he too be ready?

Of course not. Dumbass douche is too busy thinking about how he looks with nine ladies that he isn't thinking about f*cking said nine ladies. Encased in sweet succulant punani, his hands lie empty upon the beautiful thighs offered to him as a taste of what could be if only he would man up and take charge.

Instead, he'll end up in his hotel alone, replacing a woman's thigh with his dick, fantasizing about what the orgy WOULD have been like, if only he'd had the nerve to make it happen.

Way to go Scrotey. While others were out BEING men, you were perfecting how you would look as a man. Is it any wonder that, when opportunity knocked, you were still staring at the mirror?








And for those of you who've actually been in an orgy, well I hate you.







Unless you have pictures.
 

8 reasons to jerk off in this pic. I'm not fond of that blonde in the middle, but that ukulele art would probably be enough to rub the first one out.
 

With all 8 of their vibrators buzzing under the box springs no one had to waste a quarter on the Motel 6's vibra-bed.
 

**reads anon 10:25's post; hangs head, removes gold tooth and do rag; pops in Coldplay CD and turns on History Channel**
 

When frightened the turdle retreats back into it's smell
 

Indeed.

But I feel we must also respek the organ. Especially the one on the left's.
 

@'Sock, 10:51 p.m. -

Only 8? Which sorority gal forgot hers at home?
 

Lemme hear some of those balalaikas ringing out.
 

Word has it that Dirk Benedict has a boll weevil tattoo on his right ankle.
 

I also like the ubiquitous white hotel cup that white, map-of-Africa shirt has in her hand.

I think I see Zambia.
 

^ Lesbo Ernie,

Zambia, indeed. If you look really close you can see the tip of Batswana.

I think that's the ubiquitous White Castle cup, meaning our boy is reveling in the sweet aroma of hottie flatulance,(hence, the smile and shades.)
 

kinda funny
 

Word has it that Dirk Benedict brushes his teeth with Ben-Gay and has the legs of a pony.
 

Word has it that Dirk Benedict plays strip Yahtzee with Kathy Bates and Powdered Toast Man while Celine Dion mocks them all in Yiddish in the background.
 

A rotting pile of unused brain cells and one soul patch douche with shades on inside.
 

@Darksock,

but what to do with the spent douche-rod once it has served its purpose?

"...The spent douche rods are usually stored in water or boric acid, which provides cooling...the spent douche continues to generate decay heat as a result of residual radioactive decay..."

I say we skip the boric acid, chain the douchebag to a tree, and firehose him with hydrofluoric acid.
 

So how much do 8 hookers cost on a Sunday night in Phoenix, Arizona?

Obviously Chase brought enough.