Hot Chicks with Douchebags: Friday Haiku

Friday, June 26, 2009

Friday Haiku

Stephen's Hawking 'Mo,
Bethany giggles softly,
Motorbike jumps hair.

Motorcross poser
Has Harley attitude with
tricycle street cred.

-- Douche Wayne

Hair model, spray gel
Ass model in tight blue jeans
Grab it, I would, too

-- Vin Douchal

Mohawking Grab Ass
Pauses his X-box bike game
to mack on Katie

-- JoMama

Playstation on Pause
Hott ass pear grab cant hide shame
how to moto-x on VHS

-- indyhoosier

Sheen on 'bags forehead
Feels like I'm looking at the
Douche In The mirror.

-- Crucial Head

# posted by Douchebag1 @ 7:02 AM

Comments:

Wow that is one douchey 'do!

# posted by

Chris in 'Baghdad : 7:03 AM

Wings upon his shirt
Red crest atop his noggin
This dodo can't fly.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:06 AM

His drink is so stiff -
It gave his hair a hard-on.
Wonder what hers does?

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:06 AM

Mohawking Grab Ass
Pauses his X-box bike game
to mack on Katie

# posted by

Suzy : 7:07 AM

Their hairlines recede
Like boys in M.J.'s presence
Ummm, was that too soon?

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:09 AM

Little Lola Hott
Has 5-head like a billboard
Firm ass pear to match.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:10 AM

A punk should never
Pay this much for such clothing.
Price for hand on arse?

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:11 AM

Swifferhead cops feel
While hott cops swig of Rogaine
Biker jumps off cliff.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:11 AM

Spartan bag,
Sweatered hott,
ass grab,
ends it

# posted by

I R A Darth Aggie : 7:12 AM

Come Monday, the gel
Will be washed out, and he will
Attend spelling bee.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:13 AM

Hawk 'bag shows his hott
Cool DVD collection
But she wants Blue-Ray.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:16 AM

Stereo webcam
Wishes it could look away
He's so not punk rock

# posted by

saulgoode42 : 7:16 AM

If a pretender
Mauls a hott in the forest,
Is he less a bag?

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:18 AM

Mohawk useful for
Fanning cool air into room
To beat summer heat.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:19 AM

Niecy has gifted
An '80's era big screen
House still a "Hott Mess"

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:19 AM

Little Red Rooster
still thinks bigger is better
but not in his pants.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:19 AM

Lookin' good, brah,
Reaching for her sweet ass pear,
Run, Bethany, run.

# posted by

Hong Kong Douchey : 7:20 AM

Hair model, spray gel
Ass model in tight blue jeans
Grab it, I would, too

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:22 AM

Lines shaved into head
Are steps to make lice's climb
To Hawk's peak easy.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:22 AM

Bag has big hawk,
Makes up for his small jock,
Hair gel for all.

# posted by

Matthew Hanlon : 7:23 AM

How the fuck do you
Pluralize lice anyway?
I am at a loss.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:23 AM

Motorcross poser
Has Harley attitude with
tricycle street cred.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:24 AM

X games moniker
roosterdouche signature jump
ass pear la planted

# posted by

let it bleeth : 7:24 AM

@ crucial

The plural of "lice" is "geese."

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:24 AM

Rusty, "The Hacksaw"
Groping arse of tight li'l hott
Mom called, time to go

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:24 AM

Playstation on Pause
Hott ass pear grab cant hide shame
how to moto-x on VHS

# posted by

Indyhoosier : 7:24 AM

Greasy bag rides bikes
Cops feel, wears bling, ugly shirt
still gets Hotts??! So wrong!!!

# posted by

Suzy : 7:25 AM

Hash marks down douche face
Line up perfectly with the
Crosshairs in my site

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 7:28 AM

lauren holly hott
night in the life of jimmy
redhawk. overdose please

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:28 AM

I'd advocate the
regular theme, "boobies", but
Butt makes stronger case.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:29 AM

Little known X-Game
This hawked douche wins hands down, called:
Chodocross event.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:30 AM

Looks up to heroes
Hawk, Margera, Matt Hoffman
They would laugh at him.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:32 AM

Shave lines in temple.
Thought they were "lay lines", but no!
He aint getting laid.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:34 AM

Billie Jean tells 'bag,
"Beat It - your Human Nature
Is Off the Wall, douche.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:34 AM

Failed Motorbike Choad,
Poor scrote-There are no Faux Hawks
Beyond Thunderdome.

Die screaming,
Mr. Pompous

# posted by

J-Pompous : 7:34 AM

Silly-ass peacock
Hopes to attract female mate
Plumage leads to shame

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:38 AM

Dirty Diana
Makes Another Part of Me
Want to Beat It good.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:38 AM

its human nature
pretty young thing starts with men
always in mirrors.

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:41 AM

The angel of death
Became a bug, hit windscreen.
This is that t-shirt.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 7:41 AM

Tiki glass contains
Final mohawk solution
O'Douls and Naire.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:41 AM

Red Crested sh*tbird
left hand busy but later
right hand busier

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:41 AM

douchebag didn't think
a. b.c. was easy. held
back grades 1 2 3

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:44 AM

Expensive flat screen
Pricey ugly clothing, yet
lives with Mom and Dad.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:44 AM

Sheen on 'bags forehead
Feels like I'm looking at the
Douche In The mirror.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:45 AM

hawk's hand on hott's ass
find me a jaegerbomb now
are those V H S

# posted by

douchewalker : 7:45 AM

show them how funky
strong is your mowhawk, poor hot
who's douche and who's not

# posted by

vibrant douche : 7:49 AM

Wall-E watches them
Waits for chance to do his job
Throw them in garbage.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:49 AM

These two demonstrate
The worst disguises ever
devised by Coneheads

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:50 AM

her butt is fine, too
good for you,because you're bag
you're bag, you know it.

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:51 AM

Crucial refs Wall-E
A secret pedophile?
Takes place of MJ.

But I know ref, too.
I think it's possible that
I have said too much.

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:52 AM

To pee in her butt?
Or, launch my motorcycle
Into her butt? Hmmm.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:52 AM

O damn u Crucial
I had my Wall-E reference
All cued up to go...

# posted by

DarkSock : 7:53 AM

Most disturbing thing?
This dude's rocking a crew cut.
Dorsal fin on skull...

# posted by

DarkSock : 7:55 AM

If a traintrack breaks
Douchebag's hair could bridge the gap
much like Superman.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:55 AM

throw bag off the wall
won't stop til he's had enough
she's out of his life

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:56 AM

It's all fun and games
But beware of ceiling fans
things could get messy.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:56 AM

Broke-ass douche pours drink
For Katie in his "chalice"...
Mom's candle votive.

# posted by

DarkSock : 7:56 AM

Banned from Metal shows;
Douchebag's front row head banging
Blows the drum kit down.

# posted by

DarkSock : 7:58 AM

charley tells angels;
secret mission, viral ass
cancer, wipe out douche

# posted by

M_Shale : 7:59 AM

Carefully coifed head
But dip in hottub reveals
male pattern baldness.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 7:59 AM

Will Wall-E probe Eve
With his little shovel hands?
Wish I was robot.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:00 AM

Douchebag converted
Doorways in house to arches
So he can walk through.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:02 AM

New breed of dino
Ridge-skulled Doucheasaurous Rex
will be extinct soon.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 8:05 AM

douchebag reads more words
on t-shirts than from books, still
fascinates young bleeth

# posted by

M_Shale : 8:06 AM

Lines shaved into skull
one for each Playstation game;
unsatisfied hott.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 8:07 AM

I can't deny it:
I'd bang Eve in spite of the
high-voltage danger.

# posted by

Justin C. : 8:09 AM

Is not his lover,
Just a girl, claims I'm the one.
Kid is not my son.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:10 AM

No M.J. Haiku?
I had this stashed for front page:
"Little Bleached Urkel"...

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:10 AM

Rooster's rad mohawk
Is a negative image
Of Plinky's Mom's poon.

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:11 AM

A hairstyle like this
might be handy if used as
some type of foreplay.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 8:12 AM

She's only in it
to bring Bryce to thanksgiving
and get back at Mom.

anon Gee Bee

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:12 AM

There in the background
Wall-E fucks the shit out of
His plasma TV.

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:15 AM

Little Bleached Urkel
Would be awesome cover band
Like The Wacksome Five.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:17 AM

Drew the shortest straw,
then had to mould his hair in
Rosanne Barr's arsecrack.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:19 AM

the jacko sitcom
never picked up, pilot
eight is too late

# posted by

M_Shale : 8:22 AM

Not only does he
Reek of AX, his head could be
Used as a hair axe.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:25 AM

Lego Hair snaps on
during the week, helmet head,
ridge/lines for weekend.

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 8:37 AM

@Crucial Head...

Excellent use of today's current event in your Haiku.

# posted by

MC 900 Foot Douchebag : 8:37 AM

All windows covered,
Not even light can escape
Lair of the douchebag

# posted by

End the Haberdouchery : 8:40 AM

This f*cker's hair grows
each time he tells a lie, like
"The blood test was clean."

# posted by

Douche Wayne : 8:40 AM

Yay! Front Page again
Print it out and tape it on
The old cranky Norge

# posted by

Vin Douchal : 8:40 AM

Her tight little ass makes up for her bad hair style. He has nothing to offset his moronhawk.

# posted by

Brian : 8:41 AM

she is so lovely
despite douche proximity
I would tap that ass!

# posted by

creature : 9:04 AM

grip that glass baby
it's size & circumference
is like my gap plug

# posted by

creature : 9:07 AM

I'm still chortling
Over Baron Von Goolo's
"Who's the gay caveman...?"

# posted by

DarkSock : 9:07 AM

spikey hair farmer
he is from Iowa
can plow fields with 'hawk

# posted by

creature : 9:16 AM

when Homer is bad
Pa beats him hanging by heels
then bastes in hog fat

# posted by

creature : 9:19 AM

Last time Ped Douchie's
gonna grab my ass.
Poison in his chai.

# posted by

Et douche, brute? : 9:41 AM

when mohawk was punk,
this was never intended.
maim douchebags indeed.

# posted by

g0dluvsugly : 10:07 AM

This turd spends way too
much time in the poultry barn
at Iowa State Fair.

# posted by

whoop-di-douche : 10:51 AM

His cock-a-doodle
hair does what his cock-a-doo-
dle won't: stiff salute.

# posted by

whoop-di-douche : 10:54 AM

Gang symbols for cock-
fighting have taken a three-
dimensional edge.

# posted by

whoop-di-douche : 10:59 AM

Charlie Sheen resents
His name being used to describe...
Wait, he's a douche, too!

# posted by

The Dude : 12:11 PM

For utter brilliance,
put Douche Wayne's work on front page
next Friday as well.

# posted by

Wheezer : 1:24 PM

I would beat Douche Wayne
but seven a.m. is an
ungodly hour.

(Next week afternoon posting?)

# posted by

Jean Claude Van Douche : 2:01 PM

Buster Poindexter
Bastard lovechild the butt
of his half sister.

Gee LeDouche

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:25 PM

Buster Poindexter's
Bastard lovechild grabs the butt
of his half sister.

Gee LeDouche

(Gotta get a new keyboard...)

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:26 PM

Gravity defied.
Rooster sports the latest look
From Babylon 5.

# posted by

Baron Von Goolo : 12:09 AM

54 inch screen
And an old bed spread for drapes.
12K millionaire.

# posted by

Baron Von Goolo : 12:12 AM

100!!

Eat my ass you shuttlecock eating ego-whores!!!

# posted by

Yes, THAT Mutha Fucka : 12:33 AM

Spanking shuttlecocks
is CADMAN's favorite game,
played with Arthur Kade.

# posted by

Wheezer : 6:57 AM

Rooster Cogburn bends
cause doo always touches roof
shirt shows her vomit

# posted by

Anonymous : 1:42 PM

turbohawk must be
mocked, even if i have to
travel back in time!

(i counted "mocked" as having one syllable)

# posted by

Steve L. : 3:55 PM

@ Anon at 12:33

One hundred nothing
This is haiku you fucktard
Learn the fucking rules

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:53 AM

Friday, June 26, 2009

Friday Haiku

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