If that is the bomb, then I volunteer for bomb squad duty!
 

Bombs Away! Somehow I can't see Slim Pickens riding those two down to oblivion.
 

Inarguably indeed, DB1. If the United States were Ash, in this scene please let the offending hand be New Jersey.
 

On this memorial day, may all fake dog tags inexplicably heat up to approximate 700 degrees and savagely burn their wearers.

And may boobies bounce in celebration. Then attach themselves to a girl with a less autistic-looking face.
 

She looks like she's either missing four ribs or her naval has inexplicably sprouted out of her solar plexis.

Good for you honey, you're a specimen. And by specimen I mean sperm sample. And by sperm sample I mean mine all over your pink hearts. And by pink hearts I mean Lucky Charms. And by Lucky Charms I mean Life cereal as in get a life ChandlerBag.
 

That bandana she's trying to pass off as a bikini top looks like it's trying to escape. Perhaps all the orange frightened it.
 

@ Vin Douchal

Weirdly high belly buttons are usually the sign of a tummy tuck.


I love how he has the fauxhawk going on, but has brushed the sides of sides of his hair foward to cover his balding areas.

The only person you are fooling, Chandlerbag, is you.
 

so, can you diffuse bombs with a motorboat? at least tow them out of the shipping channel and drop them with a dismounted anchor....

i wanted to be kind to the scrote

but the cucci earbling, the dogtags, the dippity do and windscreen from a 80s harley(the lean years) just won't let me
 

@vin

Maybe the navel style is like what chicks used to do to their eyebrows: Remove them completely and then draw them on in a different place.

Or maybe she pierced her sternum.
 

Ahhh thanks for that DB1. Bruce Cambell is fantastic, and Sam Raimi is a god. I'm a bit apprehensive about "Drag Me to Hell" but I have faith in Mr. Raimi. This helps wash away the sadness from reading the paper today and seeing the 4 page memorial one of the papers did to all of our fallen soldiers. Yeah, that's a depressing way to start the day. Coupled with the fact that the average age of them was barely 25 it hasn't been a good morning.

She has a short torso. I am sorry cute bikini top. It sucks, I know, but thems the breaks. You have a nice rack to make up for it so it evens everything out. I'm still baffled by the physics of those tops. Perhaps they know something I don't about how to wear them. Or perhaps actually having fun is out of the question with those sorts of tops.

I think today all snipers should be given a free pass to take out all who wear fake dog tags. Head shot FTW. Double points for a head shot and one through the tag.
 

This comment has been removed by the author.
 

Rapunzio (Rapunzel in Jersey)
 

Sorry. While those two minutes are indeed like the first sip of a truly fine wine after sufficient airing, I have to argue that *this* is indeed the finest 2 minutes of cinema history:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfkHkdu5IEI

=)
 

Happy Memorial Day, everyone.

@ Ashfish: Are you saying you do or do not have a nice rack? Because it looks really good in your picture.

Clip from "Evil Dead II"- Believe it or not, years ago I watched that movie with a girl on our FIRST DATE, and I ended up getting laid... TWICE! :)
I, too, have an enchanted hand that magically finds it's way down my pants everyday.
 

@Reader Mike

Thanks for the compliment, but I was just stating that those tops and I do not get along. I think it has to do with me being the dork who likes to do flips and stupid shit into the pool. Coupled with the fact that I'm Italian, and very animated when I talk, that shit just ends up around my waist at the end of the day. I have learned from inadvertent nipslips that straps are my friends. And even then there is no guarantee.

Also, fuck my boss, in the ear, for not telling me we have today off.
 

It's a shame when you have to tie your boobs down like that. Let them go free, I say! "Free the Jersey 2"
 

This Jackass has a grin on his face like he knows what happened to Hotts Gerbil "Mr Fits"

And yes Ash does look like she could give a good run on any of these hotts in the chesticle area
 

First you wanna kill me, now you wanna kiss me, Blow Baby!

This here is called my boom stick
One of my fav movies
 

When we were dating, Mrs Tempest took me to see Armies of Darkness. She figured if I liked it, that would be a good sign. I liked it, and it was a good sign.

"Good Ash, Bad Ash, I'm the one with the gun..."
 

@ ttrenka

Excellent choice. If you liked "Brain Dead", you should check Jackson's first (and arguably best) movie "Bad Taste"
 

@ Ashfish

Unfortunately, I'm having a hard time visualizing some of the problems you say you've had with your swimsuit tops. Probably best to give me some visuals so that I could get a clearer understanding of the troubles you've experienced.

This may seem like a pathetic play to see your boobs, but it's really about clarity... Communication... That "a HA!" moment when I can say with confidence, "Yes, Ashfish, now I know what you're talking about."
 

Can I second that Reader Mike?

Come on Ashfish, enquiring minds would like to know.
 

Pathetic...
 

LOL,,,,Geeeez
Baghunters getting desperate
 

I wanna play with those big fun bag boobies all night
 

Fortune favors the bold.
 

Boobs
 

Lol, where's Darksack posting dane Cook joke's?
 

Chandlerbag kinda reminds me of Douchestral Cycle (I and II). except that i didn't expect Chandler to bag hotter hotts than DC, because DC looks like the kinda guy who knows some evil sinister techniques to douche up the hotties. Chandlerbag just looks kinda... dumb.

i think the lesson we can learn from all this is that we should never judge a scrote by his douche.

whoa. that was so deep i crapped my pants.
 

A platinum core set of knockers AND Bruce Campbell? DB1...are you hitting on me?

Evil Dead II vs Braindead (aka Dead Alive), eh? HA! O, you scamps are ADORABLE!

And by "adorable" I mean a decade and a half behind the times:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bNuHJmtTpQ

Trust daddy.
 

Boobage on an epic scale
 

My, that Baron Von Gooloo sure expresses his COCKiness.

I may be a decade and a half behind YOUR crusty old times, but maybe we aren't all sitting in rocking chairs grandpaw!!
 

Look at me! I'm Baron von Goolooo and I'm a scary white man! I wear a small-pox infested coat. Boo!!!!! Me so scary.

Fuck you and your entitled attitude.
 

Yeah, I remember my first beer, too.
 

rnd one = me.

rnd two = goolo planting a nazi flag in his own startled throat.

racist fuckwit.
 

rnd three = me, feeling slightly sad that your mother couldn't stop drinking while she was pregnant with you.

I refuse to get into a battle of wits with someone that thinks there's a "w" in "grandpa." It would be like punting a kitten. It's fun for a minute or two, but then you still have to clean the fur off your wingtips. Ultimately, tedious.

Here's an "entitled attitude" for you, chuckles - you haven't EARNED a flame war with me here. Go get a blogger handle, work on your material and maybe - MAYBE - later I'll get into it with you about how you're just angry at the world because your scoutmaster stopped calling after your fourteenth birthday.

Good luck with that.
 

folks folks all due respect here, those are not clips, this is a clip

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzVV9CwGkLQ&feature=related
 

NJ Sleestak attack!
 

I heard a bigtime bitchslap
 

I didn't know that the standard issue haircut in our military forces was a fauxhawk. Maybe he's in the French marines? Check for silver earclips on his nutsack.

She has gravity-defying chesticles.
 

That series of sonic booms was Baron Von Goolo's pimp hand re-entering the atmosphere.

Day-Yamm.
 

@ euripidouche

Outstanding choice, sir. My personal favorite scene involved a rottweiler and some serious comeuppance.

Excellent choices all around. Everyone should have four more movies in their Netflix queue now.
 

@ Baron Von Goolo, 1:01 AM


Fuuuuuck me! That was great!
 

Trollin', trollin', trollin',
Goolo plumbed your colon,
Keep those anons trollin'
So snide!
 

This is a wannabe douche. He is with a level 9 bleeth. She has probably infected him. She is orange, his tan looks like he actually got it from the sun. She has the more ridiculous 'accessories', note headband as bikini top and silly wrist thingies. Oh, and the ridiculous doodad hanging from her bellybutton.
He looks genuinely proud to be seen with her. She is his first hott captured as part of his initiation into the brotherhood of 'bag.
Sadly, he is already to infected to be saved. Notice his faux hawk, fake dog tag with a cross punched out of it ("Verily, verily I say unto ye that there is nothing douchier than combining Jesus bling with fake dog tags." Song of Douche 3:14), gay-ass mega sunglasses and lack of a shirt indoors.
I am willing to give him a pity pass as his hott has nothing going for her other than her fake boobies. He just has to promise not to reproduce.
I'd say the hott is a butter face but the orange is a major turnoff. She is so bleeth she is no longer a hott.
 

@ Scrotewalker



But... BOOBIES!



Mmmmmmmmmmmotorboat!
 

I keep reaching to adjust the color on my monitor. Is jaundice somehow in this year? WTF? You don't need to make yourself look like one of the missing Fruit-of-the-Loom guys wandered off set during a commercial shoot to get guys, sweetie: You have massive jumblies on your chest.

Seriously, who finds that attractive? It's like someone came up and spraypainted a massive penis on a Rembrandt or something.

I'd mock him, but I don't have the strength left. Just let him look that way. He'll figure it out on his own. Maybe.
 

Batou:

BOOBIES!

I can always bag her head.
 

I have a large penis I would love to use on her.
 

back in my day, the sun turned you brown when you went outside. we called this "tan".

has a massive epidemic of colorblindness taken over our world to allow this recent outbreak of intentional orangeness?

I must have missed the memo, but as far as I know, orange is still the color of fire, oompa loompas and an astronauts powdered juice, while tan is that attractive skin tone people wish they had and which I seem unable to get on anything but my neck and forearms.

If she didn't look so horribly off-color and wasn't making the worlds most braindead look, I might be tempted to pee in her butt.

till then, you gotta piss on yourself hon.
 

Really? Orange is a dealbreaker for you guys?

I gotta vote with Capt. James T. Kirk on this one. Color schmolor. Slap a Klingon headpiece on her and pretend that you're the luckiest guy in the history of the Comicon.
 

@Scrotewalker

Sorry. He is a massive douche and she is but a garden variety Vegas cum-dumpster. With boobies and therefore the more innocent of the two (unless you count the churning cauldron of Chlamydia between her legs as a bad thing). Granted, she likely thinks that she won't get HPV because she "don't sleep with queer" --but again, I say she and her boobies are innocent (just like the step-daddy who paid for them).
 

you guys sure have a funny definition of the "greatest scene in cinematic history" . . . I AM AN F-B-I AGENT!!!
 

Ryan Scrotecrest?