don't get me wrong here gang...i am a huge fan of boobies. 32,34/C boobies.



these are just stupid. and by 'stupid', i mean 'stupid'.
 

With balloons that big she'd be floating without the douche to her right weighing her down.
 

I agree with omega, he's weighing her down like a ton of poo.
 

she looks like she was created by a sex-starved video game animator. dude doesn't look like he has much more than a slight case of stage 1 Grieco-virus infection. A few hours of the Ludouchovico treatment should cure that.
 

This pic has made me want to masturbate...and i will
 

Perhaps his shirt should say "Drink till you think those are real"
 

What a pile of maggot crap this pud is. I'm not into dudes what so ever but gomer pyle is a better catch then this phucknut
She should be wearing the shirt and a mainline at the budweiser plant still would not be enough.
Turdacious
 

She either has viciously deformed nipples or the most perfect nipples in the history of female breastusisisis...

Also, loving her Platinum-Swedish-Aeon-Flux look.

And the guy is def not a douche. If i were standing next to that angel of modern surgery i would feel to compelled to make a hand gesture as well... a very selfish hand gesture...
 

If any execs from NBC are reading these comments: replace Daphne with this bird.
 

Wow!, are his eyebrows connected to his sideburns?
Phah!, Boobs are Boobs she can slap me stupid with those.

Turdacious
 

Sorry pfah..
Turdacious
 

i would love to curl up and take a nap in her bra
 

But I'd like to crush my jaws between those things.
 

This reminds me of the zoo scene from An American Werewolf in London (sic):

"A douchebag American man is counting my balloons!"
 

@rubbery -

Nap away - she doesn't need a bra!! these days.
 

shitty, shes actually naturally pretty, at least get a sensible, classy boobjob, i mean wtf are those things
 

@pfah -

So you're telling us you can measure Mrs. Pfah by hand?

Attaboy.....
 

Such is the sorry state of our "culture of celebrity / everyone can be a celebrity" world that these two seem vaguely familiar even though they almost certainly are not. Perhaps she's really a guy and appeared on Springer while someone hit him in the nuts with a fairway wood.
 

She's like a Circus Freak and I wanna be the Ring Master. Mmmmm Mmmm let me direct your attention to the center ring!
 

Is it just me or do most of the items in the definition involve the word "bag"?

Odd coincidence?
 

@Wheezer

#5...'sac'.
 

such a welcome view after seeing the shamwow douche....

i'd hit it.
 

i mean i'd hit her, not shamwow.

just clarifying.

not that there's anything wrong with that.
 

@JCVD -

Oh yeah, I saw that. Now, had there been specific mentions of "scrote" or "choad," I'd be suspicious that DB1 culled that from someplace other than his Webster's or Funk & Wagnall's.
 

File this under: "Average Joe with Douchebagette".
 

Ms. Balloon would probably be a finalist in this year's Golden Globes competition. but she probably won't win the award itself, because i can already think of which boobs i would vote for over hers, and it's not even halfway into 2009 yet.

that doesn't mean i won't nuzzle in her suspiciously silicone-like canyon of heaven, but i'm totally fair and objective like that in my assessments.

and naturally, Brinkturd would be totally ignored.
 

I think that's Carnie Wilson

Her boobs are huge.

"Drink 'till she's hot" is the equivalent of saying "I can't get laid by good looking girls."
 

Nothing says "sexy" as a couple of ruptured silicone implants in a woman's chest.
 

Those are some rather large Milk Cisterns
 

"Hey Chuck, the dairy load just got in."
 

not a douche. Maybe a "bra" at best.
 

Isn't there something just... wrong... with women who do this to themselves?

She needs a quiet session on the couch for maybe an hour or so, and my rates are fairly reasonable...
 

He deserves a pass. He's actually an undercover DEA agent trying to win the confidence of the infamous international drug mule, Bubbles McNippleSpigot.
 

^exactly...
 

I guess he's back on the wagon now..............
 

... or is that off the wagon? Jerry?
 

Boobs.

But I digress.

Boobs.
 

Well, it's pretty obvious what Jon Favreau did with his first "Iron Man" royalty check...
 

The back of this turd's t-shirt should read:

"But all the alcohol in the world won't make me hot."
 

jesus christ it looks like she hasnt been able to fart in a long time. i hope she's around if i start to drown.
 

I think these qualify as definition 4.

ps. Fake boobs are gross! As a girl who likes girls, I'd have to say that I prefer small, real titties over big fake ones. Fake boobs are hard and uncomfortable. And they make me sad wondering how low your self-esteem needs to be to risk your life in surgery to have ridiculous fun bags
 

Irony of all this is that a lot of women with the generous real thing up front would be too modest to reveal so much flesh like this. But get a pair of fakers and the blouse must be pulled back and way down to show off the merchandise like a fake Rolex wristwatch.

Oh, exCUSE ME! Those are real fakes, nothing artificial about the genuine silicone implants. Folks, find the medical firm that manufactures these and invest your dollars there, because it appears women are not going to stop the full frontal frenzy. Even if it is trashy-looking.

I give him a nottadouche pass, but he'd better lighten up with that hand signal.
 

He's not making a 'bag hand-gesture - he is indicating how widely stretched her nipples are. Areolae the size of saucers...

I agree with a previous poster - she'd look quite good if t weren't for those two adverts on her chest just screaming "Esteem issues - Please stand clear of the self-destruct at 30"
 

With economic hard times ahead of us, it's obvious she's a harbinger of....inflation.

He's gonna get arthritis if he keeps holding his hand in that position.

Trust me.
 

She is the extremely beautiful Marie-Claude Bourbonnais.
The photographer is the douchebag here, as he managed to make her look this bad.
Google is your friend.
 

I would injure myself motorboating those bags. then i would have to sue her...but she is very very suckle worthy...boobalicious indeed, boobalicious indeed
 

@Whoop-di-douche 3:11
two reasons: one, they don't show that kinda skin because if they're real....they're worth the wait.
two, its pretty damn hard to find a bra that REALLY makes natural boobs look amazing in a top like this. it would probably require duct tape.

and yes i would know. my boyfriend nags me to go out with my cleavite showing so he can brag [about the REAL rolex watch] and it's hard to do.

btw, DB1 never really said this guy was a douche, he was just pointing out these absurdly huge tits. i bet they're hard as a rock. gross. whats the fun in having boobs if they dont bounce?
 

@ shawkin

Don't blame the photographer for showing what she looks like pre-Photoshop.

I had no idea who Marie-Claude Bourbonnais and googled her.

29 MY ASS. Maybe six years ago it was possibly true. If she told me her jugs were real, I'd believe that before I believed she was 29.
 

I can google a pig raping a raccoon as well, but that doesn't make it more appealing to me.

Daddy did not love her.
 

God I'd love to use her boobs for sleeping.
 

She's on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/people/Marie-Claude-Bourbonnais/1134728406
 

If she told me her jugs were real, I'd believe that before I believed she was 29.
Well, maybe if you add up the age of the different bits of her body and weighted them by mass then maybe she is 29 on average? So 58kg of woman, 10kg of that being breasts is 18% by weight boobies. To get 29 when she was 35... We are solving Nx + (1-N)(x-y) = 29 where N is proportion of her mass that is not booby, x is her age and y is the age she had them done at. Plugging in x=35, N=0.82 we get y=31. Hmm, not sure about that. I had to fudge her percentage-booby up to get that as well. If we say she is 12% by weight breast then to avoid unrealistic scenarios we know that Nx < 29. This implies that she is less than 33. And her augments are pretty much brand new.

Mr White - any ideas? I'm not a statistician. Would you be able to count stuff liposuctioned out as negatively weighted age? Or would you be double accounting because it already has an effect on body mass?
 

I don't think those boobs are real. I think they are breast implants.
 

cougar with tooomaaaz!
 

Ginormuss Boobies.

Ur doin it rong.
 

A Slap-Chop to the larynx of the unscrupulous prick that performed this surgery.
 

No doubt her boobs are attention grabbers. Maybe it's my age showing, but when I see a set like that nowadays, it reads more as a warning than as a source of pleasure.

Two reasons. First, because of Tea Bag's thoughts @ 2:15: "...they make me sad wondering how low your self-esteem needs to be..."

Tea Bag, as a boy who likes girls, I'd have to say that I too prefer small, real titties over big fake ones, precisely because of the self-esteem assumptions (plus I'm more of an 'ass man' as far as that goes).

The second, and for me the most critical, reason can be summed up perfectly by Scrotius Maximus @ 7:48... "Daddy did not love her."

Friends, take it from the wise old sage Reader Mike: There ain't NO rack in the world worth the trouble a girl with daddy issues will put you through!
 

She shall hence be known as Chesty DDD McTitterson. I believe it's Norwegian.
 

Her surgeon appears to have had a former career as a float plane pilot- ie., he's familiar with pontoons.
 

Holy Fuck. I'll take it.

That is all.
 

Marie-Claude Booby-ais, eh?

Lookit all her sad booby baby friends on Facebook as well, this thing is a hidden epidemic! Lowselfesteemus trapamanus boobyitis... fixed with these easy-to-use inflatable self-esteem bags... also usable as extra shelf space -- take them in the car, on the bus!
 

And by hidden, I mean right out there, in your face.

Too late, but I'm getting better at this...
 

You know, a nasty kind of guy would step right up to Marie-Claude Bourbonnais here, unzip his fly, and proceed to use her cleavite as a urinal, just to mock the fake tits.

It's called a French piss.
 

I can think of better things to be doing with her cleavite, if I got as far as Step 2.

db on the left would just have to look on, awestruck and powerless, wishing he'd had the idea first.
 

This guy is a bigger douche:
http://img001.lazygirls.info/people/marie_claude_bourbonnais/marie_claude_bourbonnais_n1134728406_59614_1362_TPke0OK.sized.jpg
 

and this guy:
http://img001.lazygirls.info/people/marie_claude_bourbonnais/marie_claude_bourbonnais_n1134728406_59607_9867_AJ1K5w9.sized.jpg
 

and by the way, google her... you'll find some awesome and creative pictures.
 

In the event of a water landing, the blonde sitting in seat 38D can be used as a floatation device.
 

I'd bang her doggy style while hanging on to those luscious silicone mammals.

As for that loser next to her..., "Keep on your sign language classes. You'll eventually graduate to signing with both hands!"
 

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOTORBOAT!!!

(I can't believe I'm the first to say it!)
 

To 'expose' them one has to 'pose' them. NSFW!

http://tinyurl.com/df6gtf
or
http://preview.tinyurl.com/df6gtf
 

She's 40, but I'd still motorboat her. He looks like that bag who played Gutter in PCU, circa 1993.
 

hey shes actually a model from this latex photography site, check it out if you dig the balloons

http://www.pbase.com/gilp/latex_fashion
 

Yup. I knew it. She's the chick from the New York Fries ad. If you read the ad copy, you'll see that she was picked specifically because her boobs look so fake.

http://www.newyorkfries.com/
 

http://www.pbase.com/gilp/image/95616960

look under her "breast". wtf is that??
 

@ Anonymous 1:03
her boobs make me nauseated. they're absolutely disgusting

that ad's so harsh! all the other people were dressed up as characters, she was just being herself ahaha

ps. I don't think breasts are supposed to stand at a 90 degree angle. That aint right!
 

that's a fantastic mountain range, however, that guy is not even close to being a douchebag.

..although i'll let it slide this once because of those sweet sweet melons
 

*walks to podium*
*taps microphone*
*quietly surveys gathering crowd*

"Brrrrrumpski!!!!"


"That is all."
 

my boobs are bigger than my head and about as smart!