No. No, no, no. Wrong, DB1. The question is this - what the fuck are you doing wearing a hat indoors, you fucking dumb gimp? Didn't your momma teach you any manners?

Indoor hat = mannerless clod/douche

ALWAYS.
 

My dearest and closest friend one day was wearing a titled hat with a very busy design on it. While I could forgive the design on it because he is a graphic artist and bought the hat because he genuinely liked it, the hat tilt was a very unforgivable offense and I proceeded to call him a d-bag until he had enough and wore the hat properly.
 

Q: Who is Bra!'s favorite actor?










A: Matthew Bra-derick
 

If you discover that your hat "accidentallY' tilted while standing in the spray tan booth... then you have real problems.

In regards to the photo. I think it's really cute when gay guys grab at chicks tits. Silly gay guys. BTW the chicks totally don't mind when the gays get all grabby. I try to do that shit... county jail.

- Douchey Smurf
 

My humble opinion, DITCH THE F'INGLY STUPID HAT!

Those things became popular during the Carter administration, and is yet one of the smelly legacies still held over from that era.
 

She looks drugged
 

I agree with Anon 1:42. When you get right down to it "baseball" caps should only be worn by baseball players (maybe) and school children. Take off the fucking cap, pull the slingshot out of your back pocket and the bullfrog in your shirt pocket... set it free. What are you? One of the Little Rascals.

- Douchey Smurf
 

grady, you are a douchebag... & I'm no tigger!
 

btw, she's a stripper & mouth breather & pal are covering up her yobs with a paper placemat
 

...also the Hat Tilt is generally forgivable should you be playing clitoris hockey and accidentally bump into the hotts thigh.
 

If it weren't obviously a lame St. Patty's celebration (check out the green Bud shit everywhere, and even the Douchebag Murphy's poster in the background), they could say that they were ironically rejoicing Grieco's b-day. Damn Grady, ya coulda blamed it on Richie!
 

How do we know that the hat tilt was accidental? Answer: We don't.

Sorry, DOUCHE!

Also, the paid to pose hott looks like she's coming out of her Flunitrazepam-induced trance. (I'm just sayin'!)
 

There is no such thing as an accidental hat tilt.

The hat tilt signifies:
a) a professional rapper
b) any pro athlete "keepin it real"
c) a douche

No other options. And yes options A and B are equally stupid looking (glock or no glock).

If you are prone to "accidental hat tilting" grady you are also prone to:

a) accidentally buying fake dog tags
b) accidentally buying an ed hardy product
c) accidentally buying an affliction product
d) accidentally painting yourself orange
e) accidentally popping your collar
f) accidentally frosting your tips
g) accidentally preferring the Greico 21 Jump Streets to the Depp 21 Jump Street.
 

Accidental? I think not.
 

The woman is wearing a box. A box, I say!

-Ponderonymous
 

as for the pic -- it's cute their hat tilts are symmetrical.

Tragically cute in a queer eye for the douche guy sort of way.
 

i think the guy on the right bowls with obama.
 

"show us how daddy touched you"



As for the hat, I'm a purist. Anything with the bill not front and center is douche-o-matic--and never inside.
 

If there were a cartoon where an elephant talked to his penis, that guy on the right could be used as reference for character design. Just hang him upside down and get out the ole sketchbook and draw away.

- Douchey Smurf
 

Maybe the Hott has some brains - Grabby and Gropey the Must-touch twins come along and she puts a cardboard box over herself to keep their pawing hands off. Mmmm, improvised cardboard breast-defenders...
 

Douchey Smurf, I don't rightly know why, but that pretty much hits the nail on the head. "An elephant the talks to his penis." What dark recess in your mind did that spring forth from?

-Ponderonymous
 

I was just trying to find some use for a human sized, talking dick and a whale that talks to its dick didn't have a good ring to it.

Basically that guy on the right with his fly trap hanging open looks like a big wad. The irony here is that although he looks like a huge dick he probably is the captain of the S.S. Pinky.

- Douchey Smurf
 

The tilt is not comfortable! It is not even neutral and instead it is very uncomfortable. Douche for adopting an uncomfortable posing.
 

Why can't you wear hats inside? Who does this insult? I mean, I can't stand hats, but I've never seen someone wearing one inside and wanted to smack them in the head. This is a very strange custom.
 

Today's hotts have already exhibited a considerable dropoff from last week's absolutely delicious array of bikini clad beauties.

Tilting your hat is only cool if you're black.

I'm not a racist.
 

In the days of knight errantry, every one meeting a stranger had to
suppose him an enemy; ten to one he was. And the sign and proof of
friendly intention was raising the right hand without a weapon in it.
The hand was raised high, to be seen as far as they could shoot with a bow, and a further proof was added when they raised the vizor and
exposed the face. The danger of the highway continued long after
knights ceased to wear armour; so, with the same meaning, the same
gesture was used, but with a lifting of the hat. If a man did not do it, he was either showing contempt or hostility for the other, or proving himself an ignorant brute. So, in all civilized countries, lifting the hat is a sign of mutual confidence and respect.
 

Oh.
 

Or perhaps a young knave such as yourself does not see such things have meaning. A good lashing would teach a lesson not soon forgotten.

Now where's my cat 'o nine tails . . . (rummages through his saddle bag)

AhA! Hey . . . where'd that young Shakespeare run off too?

I should expect as much from a playwright. No matter.

Off to vanquish more of these scrotes!
 

Who would run away from a good lashing? Mmmmmm
 

The Dropkick Murphys are a shitty band.
 

I like Sir Slaysabag. He's silly.

-Ponderonymous
 

A hat may be more comfy tilted a little, sure. Why not pop them collars a little also; free up the pressure 'round the neck? And while you're at it, stuff entire families screaming into the ovens.

Damned Nazi Fuck.
 

Some folks are born with crooked skulls and as a consequence have a ten-degree hat tilt anyway.

There are many, many more people populating the world now, so more crooked skulls and hence, crooked hat tilts.

Whatcha gonna do 'bout them doofi?
Slap 'em silly?
 

When I go skulking about my brother's woods, I get small woodland creatures in my pants known as "chiggers."

(His tiger cat gets "tiggers.")

True story. Every time. And ticks, too. And sometimes, nervous tics.
 

So...

It's muffin-tongue day then, is it?

Maybe it's a demo of the new Tempur-PediTits®.
 

@The Observation Specialist

I must disagree on two of your observations my good man:

1. It was douchey when the Fresh Prince of Bel Air did it, and it's still one of the douchiest moves to make (the hat tilt) no matter if you're black or white.

2. Al Barr is a friend of mine from NYC and though you might not dig their tunes, they're the nicest coolest bunch of guys you'll ever meet.

;)
 

^^...they didn't even get pissed when me and Jake from the Casualties drank most of their beer backstage...
 

I never said the Dropkick Murphys were douches. I just said they were a shitty band.

Sometimes even black guys look like douchebags when they tilt their hats.

All the times white guys look like douches when they tilt their hats.
 

She looks absolutely thrilled.
 

My butt-sniffing biddy Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog, says that all hat tilts are douchey-poo-on-you, and the only non-douchey hat is a beret, which he wears.

He also says Tigger is Pooh-on-you.
 

"Hi Mom, I had a fun St Pattys. No...just out to this local bar. A couple of guys. Yes mom. Yes. My appointment is tomorrow. Yes...herpes AND warts."

-Parker Lewis Cant Douche
 

grady clearly suffers from latent douche syndrome. Note the manner in which he indicates an unconscious hat adjustment. The TDHT is not something that comes naturally, it is not a mere tipping up of the bill for comfort, which is not scrote-esque but goober-esque.

Clearly, he manifested douchey behavior because of his so called 'quest' for the hott and his inner douche surfaced, taking control of his physical body. In this he evidences the programming that the douche 'brand' of behavior will aid him in his quest.

As such, he should find a really big book, like one of those huge dictionaries on the stand at the library, and slam it shut on his nethers as hard as he can muster.

For only then might he find the help he needs. Or, better yet, an unusually empathetic librarian hott.

--VS
 

You know..... if the hat is not comfortable, it can be taken off.

The hat indoors after dark is approaching sunglasses at night for wardrobe stupidity - it serves no practical purpose but to hide the sex machine's solar panel - and if that is required, you care too much, and for that are a douche.
 

okay Grady's buddy must be an HCwDB regular. the question now is just identifying him.

or he should be. really really should be.
 

@ Rapetime 1:34

Wow, for a rapist, you have excellent working knowledge of ettiquete. Do you thank the women after tossing them out the back of your windowless cargo van? LOLLL!

@ Shamespear

It's true, and Sir Slaysabag is correct on the root of the custom. Unfortunately, and this is not a jab at your age group, rather a jab at your age group's collective parentage, you kids don't know about that stuff anymore. It's not your fault if no one told you, so I ain't mad at ya. But hats indoors, of any sort and for any occasion, ESPECIALLY at the table, was once upon a time considered an uberdouche move.

My pop was in the Navy and Mama Oblongata was a big stickler on making good impressions, so I got taught all those sorts of proper things as a wee gorgon. By that time, most of the social mores that had been in place for decades were beginning to fade away. But I learned a lot of them, and out of habit, I still bristle when I see them violated. Hats indoors is one. Elbows on the table is another. And don't even get me started on cell phones. If there was any one thing that nuked good manners from orbit, it was the cell phone.

Oh....look. The hirsute douche on the left couldn't be arsed to shave his face, but his arm? Baby-smooth. And I don't wanna hear arguments. If you get a 5:00 like that, your forearms are hairy as fuck. Period. End of discussion. What a douchenozzle.

@ Anthony LaBaglia-
I'll be sending my Short Bus over for the one on the right.
 

Only the most brutish of knaves leave their hats upon their heads whilst indoors.Verily they shame themselves and their names with such atrcocities.

Forever shall they be mocked as cockgobblers and cursed by the masses.
 

A lot of weird angles in this picture. It's kind of hard to look at. And by hard, I mean the green bud light grope shield.
 

anyone who wears a baseball cap is a retard/homosexual
 

I was trying to count all the diseases by the three in the picture when my adding machine ran out of ticker tape, and it was a new roll.
 

I think most have hit it on the head, but missed another important point - it was done not only "accidentally", but unconciously. Egads, THTA is the bigger worry here as far as looking at it symptomatically. If it is done unconciously,, it signifies an automatic response to given stimuli, such as being out amongst the hott. This, therefore, indicates that not only has it happened before, but with enough frequency to garner a Pavlovian response to the environment...May God have mercy on your soul. Or not, douchebag.
 

ok gentleman. i must say a few things. The picture accompanying my question is not me. i say again, it is not me. it is a random that DB1 grabbed from somewhere. and what is wrong with wearing a hat indoors? it is nowhere near wearing sunglasses indoors and saying so is beyond absurd. Also, the hat tilt was accidental. this i guarantee. I have since made a conscious effort to avoid adjusting my hat, so I don't accidentally put it in the wrong position.
 

If your head is a little crooked, you may be excused a 2, MAYBE 3 degree hat tilt to conform to your noggin. But a full 10 degree is never ok.

AHT, much like toilet paper on someone's heel, must be pointed out to the accidental offender (or just just laugh at them behind there backs).
 

Sorry, DB1. Grady is a douche. There's no bar in the country that mandates wearing a hat. If it's not comfortable, stop letting your mom cut your hair so you don't need a hat in the first place.
 

I just pooped a squirrel.
 

@Medusa
Once walked into an officer's mess with a hat on. Soon had it explained to me that hats indoors were not the done thing (in the sort of polite and yet vaguely insulting and possibly threatening way only a Naval officer can manage). Maybe that could be added to the list of humanitarian tasks the Navy do? Deliver food aid, disabuse Douchebags of their notions that indoor millinery is OK?
 

Are you people kidding?

"I’ve noticed that wearing my hat slightly tilted and propped up is very comfortable."

23 minutes? Im disappointed DB1. Try a half a second because the instant one makes this choice his status is confirmed. In this case, the pic, coupled with this comment, makes these two Grade A douche.

And let me set one thing straight. Wearing a hat is fine. Wearing it straight is mandatory. Putting it on a tilt reminds me of the little uncoordinated kid I see on my son's baseball team, the kid who is trying his a_s off but just does not get it. But hey, he still tries, and along the way, his hat tilts. Its kinda cute on a kid, in a spaz sense. On an adult, however . . . a 3 degree tilt says to me that you were the little loser that never played any sports, ignored by girls, but now, because some stripper says it makes you look stylish, you go along like a sheep. Douche. Period. Holy Eff people.
 

@ Scrotephobic 11:27

Let people say what they want, our military is terrific. I think,in the phrase "against all enemies, both foreign and domestic", the 'domestic' refers to douchebags.
 

If you lived in the Middle East and this was your daughter, you would legally be allowed to cut off her head and set it on fire. It's true. They have a very strict policy of not fraternizing with douchebags. I'm not saying it's right, I'm just pointing it out.