Hot Chicks with Douchebags: Friday Haiku

A flock of seagulls
Leaves its mountain of droppings
On a lovely Hott.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:03 AM

Saphic lesbians
Blonde makes my lil' head happy
Emo chick: hell no!

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:03 AM

Bleethed-out bulldog dyke
Embraces tender blonde hott
Jimmy eats her world.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:06 AM

Is the ankle bracelet
Just a tether to this choad?
Why sky blue Princess?

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:06 AM

I'd nibble that calf
Hell, I'd nibble a cow's calf
to see her boobies

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:07 AM

Jess found her first love
He, she, it is a big star
In roller derby

# posted by

plinky : 7:07 AM

Purple pouty patch -
Your goth club cannot sully
This Hott from Heaven.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:08 AM

Two Dykes in the pic
Not the theme of this site
Is that teal Velvet???

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:09 AM

Bleeth tried a crane kick
Missed fat boy, Miagi pissed
Wax off Daniel-sohn!

# posted by

plinky : 7:09 AM

Kool-Aid-headed choad
Molests a leggy club hot
On warm leatherette

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:09 AM

Den of black magic
Perfect blonde looks enraptured
Shakes me to the core

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:11 AM

Boy George makes return
Groupies backstage love his band
Cultural Decline Club.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:11 AM

It's Billy Corgin
My he's gotten fat and lame
Now Douchebag Pumpkin

# posted by

plinky : 7:11 AM

wrought iron background,
boobies on painting in back,
better than nothing

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:12 AM

Uncertain fingers...
They reek of your confusion
About hers or hims.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:12 AM

Me love her and rub
her and pet her and squeeze her
and I call her George

# posted by

plinky : 7:13 AM

Eyeliner and bald
Leave my future wife alone
Cut yourself instead

# posted by

KeirNotKier : 7:13 AM

what is background art?
Dragon feeding on a Hott
that is groping self?

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:14 AM

consideration:
use it before you lose it
Raspberry Rogain

# posted by

Dimples : 7:14 AM

Androgynous 'bag
Passionately strums blonde lute
At coffee house gig.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:14 AM

To stop perfect leg
from kicking in your face: Tackle!
Hold on for dear life.

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:16 AM

His chin butt was formed
By the steady pounding of
A scrotal raphe.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:16 AM

Blonde asks emo 'bag
"You really want to hurt me?
You like Pet Shop Boys?"

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:19 AM

The mark of the Beast
Isn't 6's on the scalp,
but a blue wristband.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:19 AM

Cosmic Weirdness; If
Ralph were a man, he would black-
en his fingernails.

Maybelline

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:19 AM

Misunderstood Tre'
Blonde Dane just needs needs a girlfriend
Tre' can fill that role...douche.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:21 AM

Emo 'bags forehead
Keeps growing and growing and
Growing and growing...

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:21 AM

His eyebrows rubbed off
On a hobo's rough pelvis.
Patch from bum's wine puke.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:22 AM

Emo 'bag uses
Purple merkin to cover
Massive widow's peak.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:23 AM

Try all you want, choad
Those bird feathers won't hide your
receding hairline

# posted by

plinky : 7:23 AM

this couch is on fire
with their passion's side effects
disease without Cure

# posted by

Dimples : 7:24 AM

@ Damn you Crucial. that's twice now!!

# posted by

plinky : 7:24 AM

This hott could barf her
Cosmo into my hair, too.
With those legs, who cares?

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:24 AM

Eyebrow rivet hooks
To gay biker's wallet chain
For full throat throttle.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:24 AM

Pris from Blade Runner
still alive. I no longer
want to see her nude.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:24 AM

Boatbutter may be
Best haiku artist ever
I have much to learn.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:25 AM

Guy Ladouche
Succeeds with Blade Runner ref
But I'm slow today

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:26 AM

Plinky, the saying
goes, "great minds, yadda yadda..."
Thanks for the BJ.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:27 AM

"Goodbye Horses" plays...
He dances to a mirror
And tucks in his junk.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:27 AM

Tre' cries on fridays
Holly offers up sweet leg
womans touch....no good.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:27 AM

If I were this guy
My right hand would not be seen
Groping under blue

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:28 AM

Bleeth finds comfort in
Man with unique-like talents
Sonar in his head

# posted by

plinky : 7:28 AM

Come on DB1?
Hot Chicks snuggled with Dyke broads?
Switch back to Night Train.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:28 AM

Magenta, pudgy
Is no way to go through life
Drop blue hott, wash face

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:29 AM

Man, will this hott be pissed...
Wakes to find dream of Brad Pitt
replaced with this thing.

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:29 AM

Boy george and blonde hott
Troubled by fading hairline
Pink rogaine not found

# posted by

Will "Wellen" Dowd : 7:31 AM

Hott's leg transparent?
Emo doc checks her cervix
Looks away in shame.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:31 AM

intentions flaming
seething desires are burning
hemorrhoids flaring

# posted by

Dimples : 7:31 AM

Emo is his life
Maybe he should cut deeper
Holly will move on.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:32 AM

Chick on left, portly.
On right, fills me with delight.
Rogaine for girls too.

Legs in air, beware.
Amerigo catches whiff.
Sends fatty crying.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:32 AM

Nude chick in painting
Gropes herself, thinking of blonde
Hello IOB!

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:33 AM

Newlyweds unite
Meg and Peg just got married
Only in Cali!

# posted by

plinky : 7:34 AM

Purple haired bag muggs,
In basement gothic lair.
Mom yells, "Dinner, Ralph!"

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:34 AM

Wah Wah goes his song
Hollys puss can cure sadness
Tre' opts for raincheck.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:35 AM

Looks like trailer for
Curious Case of Fat Choad
Market is trannies

# posted by

plinky : 7:35 AM

I would tie her legs
In a knot around my waist
Leave her there for days

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:37 AM

F**k F**k F**k F**k F**k
What is this world coming to?
Punch face this douche poo

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:37 AM

Crucial Head too kind.
Fridays are my favorite
Days for bag hunting.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:38 AM

Fire woman grabs crotch
Sky blue beauty with milky skin
Just creamed my pants

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:38 AM

Douchebag shopping list:
candle spires, pleather couch,
hair dye... and roofies

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:38 AM

Performance Art:
Has hip audience stymied
crap on plate better

# posted by

plinky : 7:39 AM

As much as I hate
Aerosmith I must say: Dude
Looks like a lady

# posted by

jeff g. : 7:39 AM

We know the reason
Emo 'bag has holes at knees
Blonde likes to strap on.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:39 AM

Secrets in his head
Holly knows the truth of Tre'
Likes bags over broads.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:40 AM

I'll reiterate
What CC said long ago:
Fat douche - not the hott.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:42 AM

it's Perez Hilton
in an awkward hetero
moment in da club.

that's all i've got this morning. i am really busy, dammit.

# posted by

the pfahmily : 7:43 AM

One thing worries me
Emo 'bag appears to be
Peeing in her butt.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:44 AM

Fat fuck in high school
dye hair,makeup,lost ten pounds
still unsure of self.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:46 AM

(Fixing 7:11 haiku)

Boy George makes return
Groupies backstage love his band
Culture Decline Club.

(Dammit!)

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:46 AM

A young Cat Deneuve...
Be "The Hunger" vampire
And kill this douchebag.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:46 AM

Inferno shows her
an unoriginal sin
as Dante dances

# posted by

Dimples : 7:46 AM

Expect shit like this
in what I assume must be
waiting room to Hell

# posted by

Douche Unto Others : 7:46 AM

Naugahyde allows
My yellow magic to sluice
Right down to the tarp

# posted by

Justin C. : 7:47 AM

"I love 'Cuts You Up'"
She says to this emo-wank.
"Peter Murphy's great!"

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:50 AM

Couch has seen action
If it had mouth it would say:
Fucking kill me now!

# posted by

plinky : 7:50 AM

Blood seeps from his scalp
After blonde takes hungry bite
Decayed brains taste great.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:50 AM

He's not excited
You can almost see his thoughts
'Bathhouse down the street?'

# posted by

plinky : 7:52 AM

They cuddle in love
Two bodies merging to one
Yes, Two Girls One Couch

# posted by

Frodouche Baggins : 7:53 AM

Large, sloping forehead.
Almond shaped eyes, retard strength.
Down Syndrome fauxhawk.

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:53 AM

He's emotional
Thoughtful and compassionate
And into male scat.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 7:54 AM

Running Man's Fireball
has lost the weight and the lights
still Biggest Loser

# posted by

Dimples : 7:54 AM

Creepy in the daylight
Waits for roofies to kick in
she sleeps....Jesus weeps.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:55 AM

Emo pleasure pad
The home of horrific Choad
Burn it to the ground!

# posted by

Frodouche Baggins : 7:55 AM

Egad those long legs
Would that they were around me
Instead of on poo.

# posted by

Matthew ~ RN : 7:57 AM

"Theven & theven"
He lisps with German accent.
Bartender chuckles.

# posted by

boatbutter : 7:57 AM

REVISION on 7:55

Creepy in the day
Waits for roofies to kick in
she sleeps....jesus weeps.

# posted by

Arch Douche of Bagbury : 7:57 AM

Yes! Front page success
But I wish I had thought of
“Raspberry Rogain.”

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:00 AM

Ok kids fun's over!
Bleeth, back to eleventh grade,
Dude, back to Sea World!

# posted by

plinky : 8:01 AM

Fantasy abounds
Emo for you, bag hunter
Hott for not Emo

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:04 AM

@boatbutter 7:27 AM - FTW!

tucking his sack back
is a nightly occurrence
in Elmer's Dungeon

# posted by

Dimples : 8:07 AM

Between Crucial and
Boatbutter, figured frontpage
unattainable

# posted by

Dimples : 8:10 AM

Dude's in big trouble
rigamortis has set in
Must now chop bleeth up

# posted by

plinky : 8:13 AM

Glenn or Glenda? Don't
Care, either case requires
Blue disinfectant.

# posted by

Captain Bringdown : 8:14 AM

No longer the clown,
Pierrot dons his corduroy
For a good night out.

Between Boatbutter's front page Haiku and Vinnie Scumbaglia's sporadic rantings today/yesterday, I now have sore cheeks and jaw. Most. I. Have. Laughed.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:14 AM

Gender is unclear.
Pants are tight but hands are large.
That's really a dude?

# posted by

'Bagnum, P.I. : 8:17 AM

The Emo disdain
feigns disinterest in cooing
hott, here's 20 bucks.

# posted by

Captain Bringdown : 8:18 AM

This is a woman?
And now I touch her like this?
Wow, I feel awkard.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:19 AM

Dear sleeping cutie,
Dreaming of better future:
Wake into nightmare.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:22 AM

None of this matters;
We are all naught but decay;
For
Poowalks the Earth.

Poo.

Poo
Poo.

PPPPPPPOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:23 AM

Dont stare at my girl!
I cannot eat any meat
That's been drooled upon.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:25 AM

Sidehair combed forward
Emobag! Think quick, catch hott!
Uh oh, he looks pissed.

--VS

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:28 AM

We've lost our DarkSock
He will never be the same
All because of this:
http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/uploaded_images/tan-711231.jpg

# posted by

plinky : 8:28 AM

OK band, now I
Have aquamarine bagpipes.
Blow into boobies?

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:32 AM

Maintain deadpan stare.
Goths deny themselves pleasure
For morose pussy.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:36 AM

'Don't worry Donnie
This choad is a nihilist'*
And he bangs marmots

*partial credit to Holbrooks Douchestershire

# posted by

plinky : 8:42 AM

Damnit.. I'm late.. heres mine:

O Dyke with hair spike
Your bleeth smell made the hott faint
Go back to Dykeland

# posted by

Johri : 8:45 AM

Good looking, references to Q Lazzarus and Peter Murphy, AND he's poetic?...Boatbutter, will you marry me?

Oh, uh, haiku, sorry.

The long luscious stems
of beautiful blue flower
are rooted in poo.

# posted by

Medusa Oblongata : 8:48 AM

Of course he is gay
smothered in pretty blonde girl
and still wants to die

# posted by

Medusa Oblongata : 8:49 AM

BB @ 10:27 ...Seriously, Boatbutter. I deduce that you like fishing. I will tie your flies. And then unzip them.

Uh, eh, Haiku, right. Sorry.

Poor Herman Munster
Cousin Marilyn is drunk
must put her to bed

# posted by

Medusa Oblongata : 8:54 AM

Those hot luscious legs
Not meant for the Dyke fondle
Go play with candle

# posted by

Johri : 8:56 AM

Frank Herbert's Novel
"Dune" had giant sandworms that
Looked less dick than you.

# posted by

Rage and Lust in the times of Holbrooks : 8:58 AM

@ Holbrooks 8:32

ROFLMFAO

"If I turn my head
and squint my eyes a little
she'll pass for tranny..."

# posted by

Medusa Oblongata : 9:02 AM

Emo ex-linebacker
Pulls down hotties like a jock,
but tortured within.

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:03 AM

The velvet dress comes off
When Holly sees the rouge on the schlong
It's barf-and-run time
Emo-up douchewad.

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:12 AM

I do say that's not a Ralph
It's Sam Ronson and
Lindsay keeps losing her boobs

# posted by

Anonymous : 9:40 AM

Gustav Klimt cries
at the 'bag in his artwork
how did it get there?

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:49 AM

Is that a chick, man?
I cannot tell either way.
Raspberry hair sucks

# posted by

Anonymous : 1:54 PM

Blonde hott in pale blue
Sits on wrong lap, gets sleepy
Mannish chick dreams big

# posted by

Anonymous : 1:56 PM

"That's a man, baby!"
Cried Austin Powers last night
Blue dress cries inside

# posted by

Anonymous : 1:57 PM

A bulldyke does not
a douchebag make, although the
chick in blue is hott.

# posted by

Anonymous : 2:29 PM

Some chicks will go to
any lengths to show off Daddy- longlegs. Chick-a-boom!

# posted by

Anonymous : 2:33 PM

oops

Some chicks will go to
any lengths to show of daddy
longlegs. Chick-a-boom!

# posted by

Anonymous : 2:35 PM

Oh screw it.

Show OFF

# posted by

Anonymous : 2:37 PM

This comment has been removed by the author.

# posted by

stlfarmchick : 4:23 PM

Medusa @ 8:48

Upon your right arm -
If you'll tattoo me braining
ScroTep, then I'm yours.

(see ScroTep @ 5:01)

# posted by

boatbutter : 4:25 PM

Emo 'bag, huggy hott.
He wears more makeup than her.
And grape Kool Aid, too.

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:04 PM

Crap, too many syllables.

Purple Kool Aid Hair,
Deserves not the huggy hott.
None cry out: "Oh YEAH!"

# posted by

Anonymous : 8:06 PM

I am drunk yes, yes
Oh so drunk am I, oh yeah
alchoholl is good.

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:57 PM

Sweat fermentasion
ignorance is bliss, oh yeah
Burbon so fuck you!

# posted by

Crucial Head : 8:58 PM

spooky picture in
the background. otherworldly
peacock hair. my eyes!

hottie bleethed on, like
how Zeus raped some girl as a
swan. sickening myth.

# posted by

Steve L. : 10:22 PM

"It puts the lotion
in the basket" he mutters
Hotts everywhere swoon

# posted by

Unknown : 10:25 PM

Hot chick with lesbag?

# posted by

Mr. Biggs : 10:39 AM

Frail blue blossom hott
Gets fatherly attention
From lesbo douchebag

# posted by

Mr. Biggs : 10:40 AM

the sad thing is that this douchebag gets more pussy than all of you losers combined.

# posted by

Anonymous : 4:49 PM

That was the worst haiku ever anon

A little late to the game but here goes:

Deep in the night club
Lurks his progeny and shame;
Rush Limbaugh Junior

# posted by

DarkSock : 7:26 AM

Melanie's closed eyes,
Her touch to Purple Bag's neck,
Oh, the fucking rage.

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:23 PM

That photo is just creepy...

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:59 AM

Friday, February 27, 2009

Friday Haiku

Hot Chicks with Douchebags Google Search:

About Me

Hot Chicks with Douchebags FAQ

Hall of Scrote

Hall of Hott

Ass Pear La Plante

Hall of Pear

Closet of Poo

Purg Hottie

The Future Ex-Mrs. DB1

Pumpy

Samuräì Scrötę

Hall of Mock

archives

Links