"How would you like to shovel this shit?????"
 

little known fact- joey actually had the inside of his glasses mirrored so he could stare at his baby blues. all. day. long....

which naturally made him impervious to Hott hand gestured insults
 

Gotta hand it to the ladies here - they're not all hotts, but judging by their expressions and "L" gestures, I think this might be a bagtag.

Carry on, wise ladies! Find and expose more for us! (And more douchebags, too.)

I'd like to see the cutie that shoulder in the middle is hiding.
 

Yeah, definitely a who let the douches out moment for the ladies.
 

Well, since I apparently fucked up the first line, I guess it's time to find some source material (IMDB OK?), though this one struck my fancy:

==================================
Ellen Brody: In Amity, you say "yahd".
Brody: [starting out of the bedroom, speaking with a bad New-England accent] They're in the "yahd", not too "fah" from the "cah".
[looks back at Ellen]
==================================
 

blondies' "loser gesture" on her forehead is priceless.
 

I that a Dallas Mavericks game on in the background?

Mark Cuban is the richest douche in the world. Fuck him.

The ladies in this pic, although not overpowering in their hottness, are delcetably smooth and soft looking. Especially short haired cutie making the international symbol for "fuck this guy" on her forehead.

Popped collars in both shirt and sport coat bring a raging fire to my brain. I wish this guy were burning in a trash can like the man on the far right in Picasso's Guerníca.

Verisimilitude.

Fuck Fish Slap.
 

Dibs on the Wimbledon-watching, blue-scarf-wearing, croquet champion heiress. Her coke habit would break me and I'd be OK with that.
 

Just looking at this whole group gave me herpes.
 

Ahhhh....the dreaded Scheiderbag....never before seen in it's natural environs.
 

Why is Rachel Dratch hanging out with this choad?
 

Left side Sharkface would've made more of an impression if she'd used her right hand to make what I presume is an "L", so it didn't look like she was carving initials in her face in the mirror.

Right chick, who looks like she's getting a Hillshire Farms summer sausage rammed up her ass, gets props for the Lynndie England pistol point.

Rock all around ladies, excellent 'Bag Tag!
 

Cage goes in the water.

Axe goes in the water.

Hott goes in the cage.

Douchebag in the club.

Big Douchebag.






Sometimes that douchebag he looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a douchebag... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he takes a picture with ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The club turns red, and despite all the poundin' and the hollerin', they all come in and they... rip you to pieces. You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred hotts. I don't know how many douchebags, maybe a thousand. I know how many hotts, they averaged six an hour.
 

Fellows, let's be reasonable, huh? This is not the time or the place to perform some kind of a half-assed autopsy on a douchebag... And I'm not going to stand here and see that thing cut open and see that little hott from the club spill out all over the dock!
 

Martin, it's all psychological. You yell "barracuda", everybody says, "Huh? What?" You yell "Douchebag!", we've got a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.
 

uhhhhh....average-looking pudgy girls from the suburbs with douchebags?
 

Brody: It doesn't make any sense when you pay a guy like you to watch douchebags.

Hooper: Well, uh, it doesn't make much sense for a guy who hates douchebags to live in a club either.

Brody: It's only a club if you look at it from civilization.

Hooper: That makes a lot of sense.
 

All fucking day. "Jaws" works exceedingly well with this.
 

smile you son of a bitch!

BOOM!
 

They may not be the hott-est, but they are decent, and more importantly, they are 'taggin...I'll take a decent looking gal with zero bleethe over hott bleethe myself anyday...ok, sometimes. These ladies need to be better valued so that other women with higher bleethe factors learn the way of the non-bleethe. So I ask you all to grant them a bonus of +3 or +4 on the 1-10 scale for maintaining the required bleethe status...and pray more learn from them...
 

Ellen Brody:You told me the Douche was caught. And I, I heard it on the news... I heard it on the Cape station.

Hooper:They caught A Douche, not THE Douche. Big difference.
 

They may not be the hott-est, but they are decent, and more importantly, they are 'taggin...I'll take a decent looking gal with zero bleethe over hott bleethe myself anyday

Seconded. A lack of bleeth goes a long way with me.
 

The two on the left need Jenny Craig. The two on the right need a plastic surgeon. The one in the middle needs a shovel to the face.

...I mean this in the nicest possible way...

...I'm just saying'...
 

They are all 'cute' at worst.

Just saying.

Someday you all will grow up and what your friends tell you is hot or what some bullshit TV show or magazine tells you is hot will not matter, and you will recognize that what your biology tells you conflicts with what culture tells you, and you will find beauty and worth in places you never realized.

Now.

Back to Jaws references.
 

Oh, I'd definitely do every one of them. Two, three times, even. Hell, I'd even let them take me home to see if I could score some backdoor action from Mom.
 

Well, maybe not Mako. Unless that's just a bad pic of her. If she's got pointy teeth I'm right the fuck outa there.
 

Mainstream Media Accepts Douchery and makes it front page news.

I just vomited on my computer screen. Now I need a new keyboard.
 

Nicely done. Blonde speaks volumes without saying a word.
 

"Show me the way to go homo
I'm tired and I want to go gay
I had a little cock about an hour ago
And then he went and gave me head
Where ever I may roam
On land or sea or choad
You will always hear me singing this song
Show me the way to go homo."

I'd suggest that the pink shirt, indoor aviator glasses, cum crunch spiked 'do and the collar flip are good starts.
 

I would agree that it's nice to see a natural chick sometimes. I would also agree that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

All that, however, is irrelevant because the name of this site is 'Hot Chicks with Douche bags'. These chicks are definitely not hot.

Therefore, in keeping with the integrity of the name of the site, all must concede this to be true in this specific case.
 

Classic bagtag by all the ladies.

There is hope after all...
 

I just got out of the bathroom and found what i thought was particles of toilet paper from my last wipe. Upon further inspection what I saw was actually a trail of breadcrumbs that plinky and dark sock had left.

They seriously need to come out. im tired of all the giggling
 

i thought Shark Week was over?

boatbutter hit the proverbial nail on the head with his call. blue scarf girl looks like an expensive night of fun. blondie has got her 'L' backwards. and Chum has more hair on his arm than Robin Williams. yeeeeech.
 

Has anyone told him Miami Vice was cancelled?
 

can anyone see what the score of the game was?
 

I've seen that kid out before. I gave him the aids whammy. I believe he goes by the name "Hornado".
 

@ pfah

'bag hunters- 1
Douchbags- 0
 

"Yo Tony! Tell them how many kawks you sucked today!"
 

Left to Right:

Yes, yes, meh, DOUCHEfuckingBAG, yes, pass.
 

Nice job, ladies! You know the douche was way too wrapped up in himself to even notice he was the object of scorn.

Dark-haired girl with the bob's face says it all.
 

Somebody kick Tony with his popped collars and cheapass shades between the fucking eyes !

Then there are the ladies, including the tallest chick in the snap who looks like she takes it in every orifice imaginable.

I wouldn't jab any of those. Female. Douchebags. I hate them all!

Oh, the burning rage !
 

@ Babagoodouche:

Salient and valid points all around, I'll give you that.

In light of this scrutiny, however, I'd still give this pic a pass, if only because it is such a wonderful highlight of bag tagging in it's most pure form.
 

I'd also like to see the two on the right when not making goofy faces, I think they may be hotts, it's just hard to tell. The one on the right is making such an exaggerated face, I can't make a judgment on what it may look like uncontorted.
 

I wonder if we can find a way to mock the douchebags WITHOUT having to resort to homophobia. Because as a gay man, I can assure you that the level of douchebaggery on display here is exclusive to twatfuckers. So don't invoke us. They're *your* kind--own it!
 

@Anon 5:57

I think a certain Mr. TechnoViking would disagree with you on that there ownership issue.
 

OH SHIT!!! SOMEONE INVOKED...


TECHNOVIKING!!!!
 

@Anon 5:57

that is certainly untrue... I myself am straight, but I lived in chueca (the gay area of madrid) You must go out a few nights in chueca in madrid and you'll see that... gay douches exist just the same as straight douches..

http://imgserv.ya.com/galerias2.ya.com/img/3/37cfddb013267ddi3.jpg
 

Great Pic!
-Much more encouraging than another Porsche/Bello/Blaze/Rehab pukefest.

Almost as good as a letter from 'Four Points'.
 

Do your old man a favor, you and the hotts take the douche over to the pond
 

Blondie is demonstrating the "one in the pink, one in my left nostril" handsign.
 

@Darksock (8:15)

fucking genius.

I'll be using that every time someone does that from now on.
 

There are no hot chics with this Ultra-Douche.
 

Dang, I may be getting soft here, not just because I'm not seeing any boobies, I'm thinking Chum should get a pass.

Wait, even if he's kidding around, he's still a giant douchebag.

Phew! Thought I was losing it for a minute there.
 

ummm, no.
 

Is the cutie with the blue scarf making the 'small dick' gesture with her finger?
Priceless all around ladies, you know drinks with these girls would be quality times just laughing at douches and then walking home and hoping they'd churn my butter!
 

@Captain Bringdown 6:09

Oh, man...you really know how to bring the pain, don't you. All hail the TechnoViking!!!

And excellent bag tag to the ladies. I'm wondering what this tool was thinking when these chicks asked to crowd around him and take this obviously mocking photo.

Chum: "Don't worry ladies, there's plenty for everyone."

--FLASH--

"So, what are you ladies doing later? I'm having a little soirre back at...wait, was there a joke I missed? Why's everyone laughing? Hey, where are you going? Don't you want my digits?"
 

A bigger boat, DB1?

Howsa 'bout a shrimp boat, for Miss Shrimp-pink-finger-twink:

Shrimp boat's are a comin'
We're dancin' tonight.
Shrimp boat's are a comin'
We're dancin' tonight.
We gotta hurry, hurry, hurry home,
We gotta hurry, hurry, hurry home.
Cuz the shrimp boat's are a comin'
We're dancin' tonight.
 

OOPS, I used apostrophes where they didn't belong... boat's should be simply plural boats...I had used it as singular with an apostrophe as a conjunction for "shrimp boat is a comin'" then changed it when I realized I'd gotten the phraseology wrong. It should be plural boats.

Now go to bed.
 

its all fun and games until you realize one of them, i'm betting big brown, fucked him anyway.
 

HUMBLE AS CAN BE! King Douchuous IV has met his match. that is all i can say about this pic.
 

God Bless these ladies - they have no desire to be around this turd. He kinda looks like a douche I worked with back in '03. He was a real winner in fact he was such a winner he ended up broke and had to move back to his native Italy... dumb ass.
 

I do declare these bitches are fine
 

The chick on the far left was giving the appropriate look for a douche of that maginitude, a look of horror. The hott on the far right, pointed out something we all know, yes he is a giant loser with awful shades.
 

The chick on the far left was giving the appropriate look for a douche of that maginitude, a look of horror. The hott on the far right, pointed out something we all know, yes he is a giant loser with awful shades.
 

Which on is Quint?
 

That line from Jaws is one of my all-time favorite quotes.
 

Hmm, isn't the L supposed to go the other way? The alphabet wasn't this blondes best subject.

Also the girl on the right looks extremely constipated.

This might be the shortest douche of all time. Or perhaps a normal douche surrounded by a WNBA team?
 

Wait, isn't this Tom Cruise from Top Gun behind those aviators?
 

It's the Donnas, with their manager.

Or a box of day-old doughnuts with a cocktail weenie casually tossed in their midst.

Same diff.
 

They're gonna need a bigger boat, allright. Cement bags are really heavy. Capisce?

Well, either way, I give the ladies major props for an excellent bag-tagging. Good on ya! And a major lack of bleethiness to boot. And I think little Katie Holmes-tress on the right is precious. I like to see chicks with an unabashed sense of humor like that.

Now, ladies, do the right thing. Remember to mix the cement indoors in a warm environment and let his feet set in it first. Cement cracks in the cold, and you can't have him floating to the surface come April.
 

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
 

Someone tell the blond hott at the left to stick out her middle finger too, while doing the loozer symbol! The result?

3D LOSER!!!!!!
 

That number of pigs is really overkill if you're just disposing of children.


Hypothetically speaking, of course.
 

They may not be the hottest, but we need more girls like this on the site calling out Douchtastic sights like this guy. His Douchism is magnified by his cluelessness. Very nice work, ladies! My ass was cracking up at your teamwork.
 

Best title and caption in a long time. Now if only we had a nitrous bottle small enough to fit in his mouth and a shotgun. Well, just a shotgun.

The hott expressions are priceless.
 

gaijindouche's comments are slowly driving me away from this site.
 

The guy looks like he's doing an irono-bag - probably nottadouche.

The girls.... I think I've seen them in DP comps on vid-clip sites.

I'd still do the blonde if she showed me a herpes test.
 

I think the Tori Spelling looking hott is signifying this guy's loserhood.
 

Blondie's actually a Special Forces staff sergeant giving the "I'm transmitting under duress" sign. She's been captured by the Cumm-unists.

Gee LeDouche
 

Blondie's actually a Special Forces staff sergeant giving the "I'm transmitting under duress" sign. She's been captured by the Cumm-unists.

Gee LeDouche
 

what a wacky crew. Mr. Douch midget masterson and his lovely tag team of the four whore retard crew