i think Madeline wears a bit too much makeup. but it's all fitting with the season and so on.

not that i would turn her away if she emerged out of my stockings.

somewhere in my subconscious something is forcing me to contemplate whether HCwDB is living proof that Santa doesn't really keep track of who's naughty or nice. shit better not think about it or else.
 

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Careful Madeline. You don't want to know where he put that candy cane first.
 

having is for the conformist masses. So is flat hair. Nothing says social rebellion like failing to groom one's face, but spending hours meticulously fucking with your hair.

I hope she clamps down and drives the business end of that candy cane through his soft palette.
 

@Steve-

I'd like it better if she was coming out of her own stockings than mine.

mine would be droopy on her sweet lithe figure.

i've used the word lithe in like 8 posts this week....you'd think I just learned it or something.
 

She's tired...tired of being admired...let's face it...he's douche.

-Honey bunches of scrotes
 

Assuming that she's wearing a Scheinhardt Sultry Blonde Bonita #26, a cheaper model to be sure, but you have to love the way the tresses caress the breasts.

Aside from the possibilities of that peppermint choker, that little tiny triangle of the beginnings of sideboob where the red halter and the xmas print converge makes me want to write a porno version of A Christmas Carol. I don't know why. (But there must be a couple dozen titles for it.)

And Goober GrabAss here should know that raising the height of his widow's peak doesn't stop us from noticing that he's otherwise bald.

He got that electrocuted jackass look down, though.
 

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And, DB1, it wouldn't be Christmas without a bottle of Manischewitz Concord Grape.

Merry Christmas, bro!
 

@The Donger

The only way this Douche got her there long enough for a picture was by first applying super glue to the candy cane. You'll note that her lips are pulled back not in a smile but in a desperate attempt to not have them stuck to the candy cane as well.

Hopefully Madeline has learned her lesson. ;)
 

Homeless Hawk, your anemic mohawk isn't fooling anyone. We all know you are going bald! There is no shame in going/being bald. There is shame in thinking that we are so dumb that your skinny spikes will distract us from your bald patches. They don't. Embrace your bald.

DB1, way to work in a Madeline Kahn reference. She is my personal hero. Funny, classy, and hot. No one today can touch her.

"Oh, you men are all alike. Seven or eight quick ones and then you're out with the boys to boast and brag. YOU BETTER KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. Oh... I think I love him."

Merry Christmas, everyone!
 

Owh... a wed candy cane. How womantic. And by womantic, I mean wevolting.

Still though, I'd blaze her saddle.
 

He's a hobo & she's a Britney Spears cheerleader wannabe in lieterhausen...

may the spacestation MIR fall upon both for a joyous holiday!
 

At birth we are red-faced, semi-round, screaming, and pure. The crimson fire of universal consciousness burns within us. Except for Keanu Reeves little known twin brother here who runs on lithium batteries and Steel Reserve. Though it was nice of Keanu to give him a "Santa's Little Helper" RealDoll for Christmas this year. Most excellent dude! And a non-heinous New year to you too Homeless Hawk!
 

If the undigested pimentos in my shit could pose for a photo, it would look exactly this.
 

Wow, shes lovely. She could use a little less makeup but I understand wanting to look dressed up for whatever event they're at. He makes visions of jabbing that candy cane into his eye dance in my head. Slightly different effect than Christmas Eve night dreams.

We could set his hair on fire and celebrate Chanukah too. It would probably take eight days to burn all that oil shit off his hair.
 

Morning, noon, and night, it's dwink and dancing. Some quick womancing... and then a shower!
 

[Madeline Kahn Elf offers Homeless Hawk a gigantic sausage]
Madeline Kahn Elf: Would you like another schnitzengruben?
Homeless Hawk: No, thank you. Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.
Lili Von Shtupp: Well how about a little... [whispers in his ear]
Homeless Hawk: [shocked] Baby. I guess I've had bigger things up there...
 

If his coke nose was any more red or drippy ~ ~
 

Douchelexic knows the meaning of "lithe"
and from his salary offers hotts a tithe.
But ignore the need for sutures
as the Ghost of Christmas Future
doffs Hawk's head with his scythe.
 

~ ~ a male baboon would mistake it for the twat of a of an ovulating female baboon, jump this guy's face, dig it's claws into his eyeballs, fuck his brain's out (literally) while flashing it's fangs skyward in some primeval conquest.
 

That's HEDLEY!
 

She looks like she knows how to make a guys Christmas a little more merry, and by a little more merry I mean she looks like she can straighten out the ol' yule log, and by yule log I mean...oops I have to go check with NORAD to see where Santa is.
 

As Marv and Shirley horsed around for the camera her roommate Lydia groused around in the background searching for her cat's missing red and white striped rectal de-worming stick.
 

I find her hair...perplexing.
 

I find her hair... to resemble a stringy bundt cake.
 

I find her hair...in my groin sector
 

Amy Winehouse, fresh out of rehab and with a fresh new haircolor, mistakes a candy cane for a crack pipe and ends up playing tug-of-war with a vagrant who made the same mistake.
 

I flossed her hair outta my teeth this morning... I was fresh of the wagon, hung over... then I puked blood!
 

I also used her bundt cake head as a midsection coaster
 

Santa left stink in my stocking.
 

Santa left stink in my stocking.
 

Charles Schulz would roll over in his grave if he could see Peppermint Patty today.
 

bundt cake head = awesome band name