Saturday, December 20, 2008
Quartasian Mia Sara Hott Enjoyed the 2008 Douchie Awards
While her coupling with Deathtongue didn't take the biggest prize, Quartasian Mia Sara Hott is happy to walk off with her 2008 Douchie for Hottest Hott.
And with this pic of QMSH, just submitted by an anon reader, is there any doubt left as to her merit for the award?
I would somersault through a field of rusty tacks in outer Uzbekistan dressed only in a mumu and ringlets of gardenias just for the chance to ride a full speed rickshaw through crowds of Beijing tech workers on the off-chance of seeing the 4th Cousin she never knew get shoved on a train.
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Oh dear God. That picture just made ME pant a little. Too much makeup, but I'm sure she'd be just as gorgeous even without it.
# posted by 
: 1:14 PM
: 1:14 PM 
i would love to be Ebenezer Scrooge if one of the three Christmas spirits is replaced with Quartasian Hott in spooky laptop-in-the-dark glow. oh yeah and the other two Christmas spirits can use some replacements too. Hourglass sounds good, because she definitely has that wind-swept otherworldly quality going on too.
what? a man can never ask for too much.
what? a man can never ask for too much.
her tousled tresses & faint glow of perspiration is how I've imagined her beneath me....
thank you DB1... your a mensch!
thank you DB1... your a mensch!
Yeah, yeah, okay settle down ya pre-pubescent sacks....
As suspected earlier, notice she has her hair pulled over the left side of her face, the side fouled by the toxic oral succus of Deathtongue.
She may have survived the mortal drubbing from his disgusting glossa but I still hold to my theory that she has a permanent scar.
That said, I'd elbow crawl naked slathered in molasses over a mile of red ant hills to open and paper cut my tongue as I re-lick her outgoing monthly bill envelopes while gargling with concentrated lemon juice just to sniff her aunt Mellie's favorite slippers.
As suspected earlier, notice she has her hair pulled over the left side of her face, the side fouled by the toxic oral succus of Deathtongue.
She may have survived the mortal drubbing from his disgusting glossa but I still hold to my theory that she has a permanent scar.
That said, I'd elbow crawl naked slathered in molasses over a mile of red ant hills to open and paper cut my tongue as I re-lick her outgoing monthly bill envelopes while gargling with concentrated lemon juice just to sniff her aunt Mellie's favorite slippers.
If thought bubbles were a reality:
Sara Hott- "Hello mr. belvadouch. would you like me to give you a tongue bath?"
Mr. Belvadouche- "why yes I would Sara Hott. That is most kind of you to offer"
Mr. Belvadouche- "One more thing Sara hott"
Sara Hott- "Yes, my dear?"
Mr. Belvadouche- "My I plant my seed?"
Sara Hott- "Oh Belvadouch! Do you really have to asK!"
Sara Hott- "Hello mr. belvadouch. would you like me to give you a tongue bath?"
Mr. Belvadouche- "why yes I would Sara Hott. That is most kind of you to offer"
Mr. Belvadouche- "One more thing Sara hott"
Sara Hott- "Yes, my dear?"
Mr. Belvadouche- "My I plant my seed?"
Sara Hott- "Oh Belvadouch! Do you really have to asK!"
# posted by : 1:38 PM
: 1:38 PM
She's so sultry and alluring I want to lick... her... face.
Oh! NOW I GET IT!!!
Deathtongue, you genius.
Oh! NOW I GET IT!!!
Deathtongue, you genius.
Oh good god... she's even more lovely in this photo, which I didn't think was possible.
I would water-ski through an ocean of Deathtongue's drool just to get a glimpse of the footprints her childhood pet left in its own poo.
I would water-ski through an ocean of Deathtongue's drool just to get a glimpse of the footprints her childhood pet left in its own poo.
# posted by : 1:45 PM
: 1:45 PM
I would brave the Mardi Gras crowd wearing flip flops and a banana hammock while covered in molasses and whale puke...just to see DB1 in a mumu...
@idahohottpotato
Would you introduce Fung as your fiance, just for the chance to touch her used nair products?
Would you introduce Fung as your fiance, just for the chance to touch her used nair products?
# posted by : 1:50 PM
: 1:50 PM
For any foolish enough to have lingering questions regarding exactly how cool IdahoHottPotato is, that's a Tool album she's peeking through.
And who doesn't love a chick who knows her way around some Tool?
And who doesn't love a chick who knows her way around some Tool?
@ mr. belvadouche -
Maybe, but I would definitely shave DJ Bello's balls just for the opportunity to sniff the gym locker that once belonged to her 7th grade boyfriend.
@ Douche Unto Others -
Since you recognized it, I must complement you on your fine taste in all things musical.
Maybe, but I would definitely shave DJ Bello's balls just for the opportunity to sniff the gym locker that once belonged to her 7th grade boyfriend.
@ Douche Unto Others -
Since you recognized it, I must complement you on your fine taste in all things musical.
# posted by : 1:58 PM
: 1:58 PM
Somewhere in Cleveland a man with the initials B.C.S. just inexplicably ejaculated so forcefully he partially decapitated his wife's beloved cat that lay purring in his lap.
Damn.
DeathTongue's stock just rose.
Damn.
DeathTongue's stock just rose.
I would defecate on Samurai Scrote's ceremonial altar and write my name in it with my tongue for identification purposes (and address along with directions to my home)for the opportunity to burn the hair off my balls using only a match from a book of matches from the gaybar her estranged brother denied going to, and an almost empty bottle of her Aussie Sprunch Spray from 1985.
@idahohottpotato
I admire your dedication, but would you take brothabag leon for a quickie while Dj bello was frolicing in the background and fish slap was filming? All of this just to get the chance to have 5 minutes alone with her bicycle seat, a tub of astro glide and a blindfold.
I admire your dedication, but would you take brothabag leon for a quickie while Dj bello was frolicing in the background and fish slap was filming? All of this just to get the chance to have 5 minutes alone with her bicycle seat, a tub of astro glide and a blindfold.
# posted by : 2:09 PM
: 2:09 PM
can i get first dibs on using lyrics from Stinkfist as sleazy pickup lines if i ever meet IdahoHottPotato in person?
i was also gonna say something along the lines of "let's throw a fuckin' STINKFIST at Deathtongue!!!" but i don't think the song's actual lyrics jibe well for this purpose. imagine telling Deathtongue "show me that you love me and that we belong together." only if that gets me ten-degrees separated access to Mia Sara Quartasian Hott in any remote form.
i was also gonna say something along the lines of "let's throw a fuckin' STINKFIST at Deathtongue!!!" but i don't think the song's actual lyrics jibe well for this purpose. imagine telling Deathtongue "show me that you love me and that we belong together." only if that gets me ten-degrees separated access to Mia Sara Quartasian Hott in any remote form.
@Steve L.
If you're looking for Tool lyrics to dedicate to Deathtongue, take it old school with "Jerk Off."
If you're looking for Tool lyrics to dedicate to Deathtongue, take it old school with "Jerk Off."
@ mr.belvadouche -
Oooh, it's not a hard limit. We can negotiate... Is the bicycle seat leather or plastic?
And would YOU let Samurai Scrote bind and gag you with his zen neckties, while Joey Porsche peed in your butt under Xenu's supervision, just for a shot at using her discarded toenail clippers to trim your chest hair into a Hooligan-like star pattern?
Oooh, it's not a hard limit. We can negotiate... Is the bicycle seat leather or plastic?
And would YOU let Samurai Scrote bind and gag you with his zen neckties, while Joey Porsche peed in your butt under Xenu's supervision, just for a shot at using her discarded toenail clippers to trim your chest hair into a Hooligan-like star pattern?
# posted by : 2:36 PM
: 2:36 PM
Hell if you wanna use Tool lyrics as pick up lines why not try Crawl Away, or Prison Sex, or if you really want to be romantic you can try Message to Harry Manback. (btw Tool's my all time favorite too)
@idahohottpotato
First things first. the seat is pleather with rhinestone studded ridges(thats right....ribbed)
I would consider it if samuri scrote used a ball gag and ball gag only!!! As for JP peeing in my butt....well...Just how many clippings are we talkin bout?
First things first. the seat is pleather with rhinestone studded ridges(thats right....ribbed)
I would consider it if samuri scrote used a ball gag and ball gag only!!! As for JP peeing in my butt....well...Just how many clippings are we talkin bout?
# posted by : 2:57 PM
: 2:57 PM
She is too hot. There must be a flaw somewhere of which we are unaware.
Perhaps she smells of sour cabbage and garlic.
Even so, I would swim the alligator infested waters of Lake Okeechobee with thirteen raw chickens duct taped to my ass and be kicked in the balls by her third cousin's Karate instructor for the opportunity to be bitten by the bedbugs that beset the sleeping quarters of her eighth grade algebra teacher.
Perhaps she smells of sour cabbage and garlic.
Even so, I would swim the alligator infested waters of Lake Okeechobee with thirteen raw chickens duct taped to my ass and be kicked in the balls by her third cousin's Karate instructor for the opportunity to be bitten by the bedbugs that beset the sleeping quarters of her eighth grade algebra teacher.
If Quartasian Mia Sara Hott and Halo Angel ever got together for some saphic lesbian conoodling; the earth itself would quiver with an orgasm so violent that all the super volcanoes would spontaneously erupt in geysers of molten schmegma that would engulf every last man, woman, child on the planet… who, ironically, would also be shuddering like Plinky’s mom in line at Dunken Donuts as their toes curled in the writhing throes of the vaunted death orgasm…
…it’s all true. I read it in Revelations somewhere.
…it’s all true. I read it in Revelations somewhere.
Now, if you'll excuse me, my hands are beginning to quake like Plinky's mom walking across a raised tongue and groove wood floor.
Hair of the dog... wherefore art thou?
Hair of the dog... wherefore art thou?
If you cover her face from the eyes up and just concentrate on the mouth down, it sorta looks like she’s about to unleash a torrential vaginal thunder gust - yielding a mighty distressful stink. A stink that I would capture with my lungs, and eventually exhaust in the presence of Palsy stricken orphan children, so that their paralyzed limbs would miraculously regain their motor skills…
…Because I’m altruistic like that.
…Because I’m altruistic like that.
Dayum. Come hither, you say with your eyes? Yes. Yes please.
I would stay sober for an entire week if it meant I would be guaranteed able to have sex with her.
What?
I would stay sober for an entire week if it meant I would be guaranteed able to have sex with her.
What?
# posted by : 3:38 PM
: 3:38 PM
The more I look at this pic the more certain I am of this:
She's looking right at me. Not through me. But down in me deep, deep into the part of me where I decipher Tool lyrics. (The human anus is 4 degrees warmer than the rest of the body.) She's looking into the inner reliquary of desires that are supposed to remain hidden and she can see that one about deploying a Benchmade to cut through her $300 belt and removing her sparse and silky body hair using a fifth of Jameson and a Zippo.
She can see all that. And judging by the look in her eyes... She doesn't mind. And that fucking burns me up.
She's looking right at me. Not through me. But down in me deep, deep into the part of me where I decipher Tool lyrics. (The human anus is 4 degrees warmer than the rest of the body.) She's looking into the inner reliquary of desires that are supposed to remain hidden and she can see that one about deploying a Benchmade to cut through her $300 belt and removing her sparse and silky body hair using a fifth of Jameson and a Zippo.
She can see all that. And judging by the look in her eyes... She doesn't mind. And that fucking burns me up.
I would tape live rodents all over by body and sleep in a Mini-Cooper filled with a hundred hungry cobras then tattoo the Arabic translation of 'Death to all Muslims' on my forehead and move to Tehran for 5 years just for the chance to be entered into a lottery with a million people where the lucky winner gets to lick the pee scum off the rancid toilet base of a nasty old gas station men's bathroom where her 350 pound uncle Vinnie took a dump once while driving trucks 10 years ago.
Yes friends; that's what I would do.
-Babagooduche
Yes friends; that's what I would do.
-Babagooduche
# posted by : 4:27 PM
: 4:27 PM
I....I....
*jumps off a building*
[Laundry Gimp sits down and begins typing]
Her last words were, "I love you, Miaaaaaaaaa!!!!!" I just thought you all would want to know that. Uh, oh...I can't get this bronze replica of the Venus of Willendorf, the one with the face like Plinky's mom, out of my anus without Medusa's assistance. I sure hope Mr. White will be here soon.
*jumps off a building*
[Laundry Gimp sits down and begins typing]
Her last words were, "I love you, Miaaaaaaaaa!!!!!" I just thought you all would want to know that. Uh, oh...I can't get this bronze replica of the Venus of Willendorf, the one with the face like Plinky's mom, out of my anus without Medusa's assistance. I sure hope Mr. White will be here soon.
Whoa, whoa, wait a minute...dark room...baleful expression...and what seems to be a heavy chain across her shoulder?
Oh, my God. MR. WHITE, NO!!!
*dashes downstairs to the playpen*
Oh, my God. MR. WHITE, NO!!!
*dashes downstairs to the playpen*
As her boyfriend, I'd let all of you perverts do everything you stated above just to make sure she doesn't leave me.
Oh, and I'd also punch a nun holding an orphan just so I could tell my friends I punched a nun holding an orphan. Cause I'm an asshole like that.
Oh, and I'd also punch a nun holding an orphan just so I could tell my friends I punched a nun holding an orphan. Cause I'm an asshole like that.
# posted by : 6:50 PM
: 6:50 PM
God that looks like my x girlfriend I just dumped...thanks for making me realize my mistake. Shit
# posted by : 7:10 PM
: 7:10 PM
oh my.
she's definitely qualified as a hott. but why is she with Deathtongue?
and that, my friends, is why this website exists.
she's gorgeous. and hopefully she's a smart as she is pretty.
she's definitely qualified as a hott. but why is she with Deathtongue?
and that, my friends, is why this website exists.
she's gorgeous. and hopefully she's a smart as she is pretty.
O, O, I've padlocked in your catsuit all day and I really need to take a dump...where are you O? What in the hell is that damn buzzing noise? O if you are mounting rabbit to QMSH again I'm going to crap all over this lovely blue latex suit to spite you!!
# posted by : 7:38 PM
: 7:38 PM
O, O, I've been padlocked in your catsuit all day and I really need to take a dump...where are you O? What in the hell is that damn buzzing noise? O if you are mounting the rabbit to QMSH again I'm going to crap all over this lovely blue latex suit to spite you!!
# posted by : 7:38 PM
: 7:38 PM
Man oh man I could beat it to her like I could beat a kid who just barfed in to my favorite Kenneth Cole's. I am quite certain that I will develop some sort of permanent nerve damage from repeated action to QSMH but it will sooooh be worth it. I think the person who coughed up the new pic should post her myspace, facebook, whatever address for the rest of us to enjoy. Come one do serial masterbaters every a favor. All your friends are doing it.
And I'm spent!
And I'm spent!
@ vader
Really? Shit that's a heavy fucking price to pay for...damn those eyes and that hair, ok fuck it I promise that I wont drink for 2 nights in a row if it meant I could lick the oder eaters that she threw in trash 3 months ago. Starting tomorrow, cuz I've a had a few already.
Damn it, shedevil! What sort of hex have you placed upon my soul and what have you done to the region of my body around my waist? It seems you've erected some sort of monument to sex in your name. Cast ye out devil, cast ye out. Now if only I knew of a way to cure this stiffness in my pantal area all would be just and right again.
Damn deserving choice for Hott of the year IMO! Glad I voted for her 37 times. Yeah that's right bitches I cheated and voted and voted and voted but who here can look at this pic and not reach for the zipper? Who? Homo's maybe and I'll bet some of them are pulling pork right now so fuck you!
Really? Shit that's a heavy fucking price to pay for...damn those eyes and that hair, ok fuck it I promise that I wont drink for 2 nights in a row if it meant I could lick the oder eaters that she threw in trash 3 months ago. Starting tomorrow, cuz I've a had a few already.
Damn it, shedevil! What sort of hex have you placed upon my soul and what have you done to the region of my body around my waist? It seems you've erected some sort of monument to sex in your name. Cast ye out devil, cast ye out. Now if only I knew of a way to cure this stiffness in my pantal area all would be just and right again.
Damn deserving choice for Hott of the year IMO! Glad I voted for her 37 times. Yeah that's right bitches I cheated and voted and voted and voted but who here can look at this pic and not reach for the zipper? Who? Homo's maybe and I'll bet some of them are pulling pork right now so fuck you!
@ IdahoHott
Are you a hilarious dyke, or just hilarious? It seems you would be willing to go to great humiliating lengths just to make an insignificant connection to QMSH.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Are you a hilarious dyke, or just hilarious? It seems you would be willing to go to great humiliating lengths just to make an insignificant connection to QMSH.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
# posted by : 8:06 PM
: 8:06 PM
Ok from the other pics I couldn't see it. This one though, holy shit she is gorgeous... thats it no filthy innuendo, or lame jokes... wow, just wow.
@medusa
Don't interfere. You know you want this as much as I do. And I'm using the smooth, soft chains, anyway.
@laundry gimp
Don't get too excited, buddy. As the Who sang, "Meet the new boss, same as the old boss."
Don't interfere. You know you want this as much as I do. And I'm using the smooth, soft chains, anyway.
@laundry gimp
Don't get too excited, buddy. As the Who sang, "Meet the new boss, same as the old boss."
I would ride around on a moped in assless chaps with yellowtail just for the opportunity for her to staple my scrotum to my inner thigh.
# posted by : 8:20 PM
: 8:20 PM
@Baggins
As heavy as it is unrealistic. You're gonna be with a woman like QMSH, you will be drinking like a FISH in no time, for a myriad of reasons, hence the paradox.
And you know what really does it for me about her? I didn't realize it before, but it is that neck. Dunno about the rest of you, but I'm a biter (styles, rhymes, Plinky's mom), and something about that long, slender neck makes me want to taste blood. It can be said with certainty that I'd give her a hickey the likes of which this world had never seen. That's right, we're talkin' full body hickey here. By the time I'd finish, she'd be black.
That said, Let There Be Bourbon! God bless Beverage Warehouse for filling my trunk with quality brown liquors and IPAs, for now, we go blind. And why? Because it's my house. And if you don't like it, you can get the fuck out.
As heavy as it is unrealistic. You're gonna be with a woman like QMSH, you will be drinking like a FISH in no time, for a myriad of reasons, hence the paradox.
And you know what really does it for me about her? I didn't realize it before, but it is that neck. Dunno about the rest of you, but I'm a biter (styles, rhymes, Plinky's mom), and something about that long, slender neck makes me want to taste blood. It can be said with certainty that I'd give her a hickey the likes of which this world had never seen. That's right, we're talkin' full body hickey here. By the time I'd finish, she'd be black.
That said, Let There Be Bourbon! God bless Beverage Warehouse for filling my trunk with quality brown liquors and IPAs, for now, we go blind. And why? Because it's my house. And if you don't like it, you can get the fuck out.
# posted by : 8:29 PM
: 8:29 PM
@ vader
Bourbon is for white trash, us sophisticated baghunters drink Scotch! Single Malts, neat. Hunkering down with a bit o Lagavulin 16 year right now and it is almost as tasty as QMSH.
Bourbon is for white trash, us sophisticated baghunters drink Scotch! Single Malts, neat. Hunkering down with a bit o Lagavulin 16 year right now and it is almost as tasty as QMSH.
@Baggins
Blah blah blah blah blah blah. I suppose it is my bad for expecting anything other than an overblown sense of superiority here at HCwDB. Not that it isn't deserved, mind you. But blah blah blah blah blah. Two of the bottles I bought yesterday were scotch, two rye, and three bourbon. Different tastes for different times.
And another thing! I'm about as sophisticated as Pfah's mom is attractive. Besides, getting blind drunk off fine scotch seems wrong. And fuck you for having Laga16. That stuff takes like used bandaids, and I envy you for it.
Blah blah blah blah blah blah. I suppose it is my bad for expecting anything other than an overblown sense of superiority here at HCwDB. Not that it isn't deserved, mind you. But blah blah blah blah blah. Two of the bottles I bought yesterday were scotch, two rye, and three bourbon. Different tastes for different times.
And another thing! I'm about as sophisticated as Pfah's mom is attractive. Besides, getting blind drunk off fine scotch seems wrong. And fuck you for having Laga16. That stuff takes like used bandaids, and I envy you for it.
# posted by : 8:54 PM
: 8:54 PM
@ vader
mmmmmm bandaids and plinkys moms ass. Nothing like a little Lav, of course when I feel like slumming I'll hit up Laphroaig. Yeah I like em smokey as hell but hey who doesn't? And fishy I like me somw fishy, like a half chewed salmon left out on a rock for a few days by a bear. Yum reminds me of plink's mom's love hole. Well you know what I'm talking about.
Superiority? Naw, just don't like bourbon. Whatchoogot? Recommend something and I'll hit it up. I've always said my favorite drink is the next one.
mmmmmm bandaids and plinkys moms ass. Nothing like a little Lav, of course when I feel like slumming I'll hit up Laphroaig. Yeah I like em smokey as hell but hey who doesn't? And fishy I like me somw fishy, like a half chewed salmon left out on a rock for a few days by a bear. Yum reminds me of plink's mom's love hole. Well you know what I'm talking about.
Superiority? Naw, just don't like bourbon. Whatchoogot? Recommend something and I'll hit it up. I've always said my favorite drink is the next one.
@ Anon 8:06 -
Sure, I'm a dyke... if by dyke, you mean mostly straight girl who would partake of a salacious coupling with the right hott.
Also, I am drunk.
Sure, I'm a dyke... if by dyke, you mean mostly straight girl who would partake of a salacious coupling with the right hott.
Also, I am drunk.
# posted by : 9:26 PM
: 9:26 PM
Why does she have a chain link fence strapped on like a bikini? Actually, it doesn't matter. Me likey.
# posted by : 9:42 PM
: 9:42 PM
@ idaho
I'll be your huckleberry. Marry me and then cheat with your yoga instructor, take half my internet fortune please.
Ooop!... ring on your left hand. Sorry! How about an illicit affair instead? I've got a strapon vagina and I'm ready to go.
I'll be your huckleberry. Marry me and then cheat with your yoga instructor, take half my internet fortune please.
Ooop!... ring on your left hand. Sorry! How about an illicit affair instead? I've got a strapon vagina and I'm ready to go.
@ Douche Vader
love me some Beverage Warehouse... can stock up on some Irish, Scotch & that's right D. Baggins some goddamned Bourbon! price is right brother & they gots all my favorite brands Red Hawk, Bushmills, McCallan, Makers & Woodfords!
I'm salivating now as I haven't had a drink since Thanksgiving! Lord Bring Christmas Day & Santa bring Creatch a fresh liver!
love me some Beverage Warehouse... can stock up on some Irish, Scotch & that's right D. Baggins some goddamned Bourbon! price is right brother & they gots all my favorite brands Red Hawk, Bushmills, McCallan, Makers & Woodfords!
I'm salivating now as I haven't had a drink since Thanksgiving! Lord Bring Christmas Day & Santa bring Creatch a fresh liver!
@ creature
Damn glad you didn't say Walkers cuz that shit tastes like plinky's moms ass. Not saying I wouldn't drink it but damn!
Yeah Woodford is decent, downed a fifth with a friend and I certainly enjoyed it.
Thanksgiving? Boy lemme splain something to you. There are only two things in this life worth living for and the first plinky's mom gives away like it was a Jerry Lewis telethon and the second is alcohol. Listen here youngin! Drinking is the only way to deal with the fact that the bags have corned the market on all of the finest kitty on the market, just look at QMSH.
Now if you will excuse me I'm going to simultaneously make myself throw up while making my member throw up to QMSH.
Damn glad you didn't say Walkers cuz that shit tastes like plinky's moms ass. Not saying I wouldn't drink it but damn!
Yeah Woodford is decent, downed a fifth with a friend and I certainly enjoyed it.
Thanksgiving? Boy lemme splain something to you. There are only two things in this life worth living for and the first plinky's mom gives away like it was a Jerry Lewis telethon and the second is alcohol. Listen here youngin! Drinking is the only way to deal with the fact that the bags have corned the market on all of the finest kitty on the market, just look at QMSH.
Now if you will excuse me I'm going to simultaneously make myself throw up while making my member throw up to QMSH.
@Creatch:
I'll sell you my pristine liver for a case o' Knob Creek...
... and I'll sell you X-Mas day Laker tix against the Celts for Quartasian Sara's used teeth whitening strips...
Help a greaser out homie.
I'll sell you my pristine liver for a case o' Knob Creek...
... and I'll sell you X-Mas day Laker tix against the Celts for Quartasian Sara's used teeth whitening strips...
Help a greaser out homie.
@ creature
And last time I checked McCallan was a single malt. The 10 year is heavily sherried and not to my taste but still good swill.
And last time I checked McCallan was a single malt. The 10 year is heavily sherried and not to my taste but still good swill.
while we're on the subject of alcohol, i likes me a woman who would drink 155-proof rum. i've only met one such woman (a former co-worker who i still want to bang).
here's to fantasizing on Quartasian Hott.
here's to fantasizing on Quartasian Hott.
She's an eyefull.
An earfull.
A hottie suckle-thighfull.
A neck-hickeyfull.
A flat little boobie-full.
Happy Hannukah, DB1 and may dreams come true in your fantasies with the littel sabra Quartasian Sara.
An earfull.
A hottie suckle-thighfull.
A neck-hickeyfull.
A flat little boobie-full.
Happy Hannukah, DB1 and may dreams come true in your fantasies with the littel sabra Quartasian Sara.
# posted by : 10:19 PM
: 10:19 PM
Uh, Croosh, ya mean pickled... right
& @ D. Baggins, I always fancied the 12 yr old McCallan for it's oak barrel flavour. however don't scotch it up so much anymore, prefer the bight of Irish or the smooth of bourbon... gimme some sour mash... there I go droolin' again, right now want whiskey more than Mia Sara... come on Christmas, so this self imposed wagon ride can go up in an alcohol haze & blaze!
I could never make it muslim (don't look good in burkas)
& @ D. Baggins, I always fancied the 12 yr old McCallan for it's oak barrel flavour. however don't scotch it up so much anymore, prefer the bight of Irish or the smooth of bourbon... gimme some sour mash... there I go droolin' again, right now want whiskey more than Mia Sara... come on Christmas, so this self imposed wagon ride can go up in an alcohol haze & blaze!
I could never make it muslim (don't look good in burkas)
@Crucial Head, 3:34pm: Ye GODS, man! -You are KILLING me!!! -dying laughing!!!
--
On a side note: I Actually Met Mia Sara's Sister. -True Story.
+Yes. She's cute just like Mia; -maybe cuter.
--
On a side note: I Actually Met Mia Sara's Sister. -True Story.
+Yes. She's cute just like Mia; -maybe cuter.
# posted by : 11:51 PM
: 11:51 PM
Nat King Cole sings to QSMH:
Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa, men have named you
You're so like the lady with the mystic smile
Is it only 'cause you're lonely they have blamed you?
For that Mona Lisa strangeness in your smile?
Do you smile to tempt a lover, Mona Lisa?
Or is this your way to hide a broken heart?
Many dreams have been brought to your doorstep
They just lie there and they die there
Are you warm, are you real, Mona Lisa?
Or just a cold and lonely lovely work of art?
Do you smile to tempt a lover, Mona Lisa?
Or is this your way to hide a broken heart?
Many dreams have been brought to your doorstep
They just lie there and they die there
Are you warm, are you real, Mona Lisa?
Or just a cold and lonely lovely work of art?
Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa
Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa, men have named you
You're so like the lady with the mystic smile
Is it only 'cause you're lonely they have blamed you?
For that Mona Lisa strangeness in your smile?
Do you smile to tempt a lover, Mona Lisa?
Or is this your way to hide a broken heart?
Many dreams have been brought to your doorstep
They just lie there and they die there
Are you warm, are you real, Mona Lisa?
Or just a cold and lonely lovely work of art?
Do you smile to tempt a lover, Mona Lisa?
Or is this your way to hide a broken heart?
Many dreams have been brought to your doorstep
They just lie there and they die there
Are you warm, are you real, Mona Lisa?
Or just a cold and lonely lovely work of art?
Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa
Disappointing, actually, she wasn't even close to the hottest hot...still, hot and all, but hottest against some of the competition this year...not even close if you really page thru the year...
# posted by : 5:51 AM
: 5:51 AM
Sorry, but the high school cheerleader with the fake ID, mommies makeup, and big sisters clothes, all in an attempt to look early 20's just doesn't do it for me. The phrase "16 will get you 20" fits her to a "T".
I accept the decision the of voters of course. But the second pic just confirms to me that doesn't belong in my top ten, let alone the Hott of the year.
I accept the decision the of voters of course. But the second pic just confirms to me that doesn't belong in my top ten, let alone the Hott of the year.
# posted by : 7:08 AM
: 7:08 AM
Somewhere deep in this girl's vagina, like all the Who's in Whoville, in a time where war and hate was never known, a small community of munchkins hold hands and work together, building a city made of shortcake, subsisting on lollipops and a peach scented syrup, rich in vitamins and minerals furnished by the God Notascrote, who rains Quartasian genetic goodness on their candy crops every spring, bringing forth a Delta's worth of life nourishment. The rumor of the phallic invasion of the Douche-devil Deathtongue is known to HCwDB readers only and we must do whatever it is within our power to hunt, kill, or mock this tainter of sacred nectar-village within Mia's body. Mine eyes have seen the power and the glory of the hott! Freedom comrades! Viva la Quartasian! Death to the douche!
# posted by : 9:16 AM
: 9:16 AM
hi, im here for the hott and the clever commenting.
also, nice to see some love for tool. carry on
also, nice to see some love for tool. carry on
# posted by : 9:45 AM
: 9:45 AM
@ bcs 10:02
No. They absolutely do not.
@ idahohott
Does it make me gay if I would hit myself in the head with a telephone repeatedly until the random punching of buttons eventually dialed your number and I could hear you say "Hello" right after you had an impure thought about QHMS?
No. They absolutely do not.
@ idahohott
Does it make me gay if I would hit myself in the head with a telephone repeatedly until the random punching of buttons eventually dialed your number and I could hear you say "Hello" right after you had an impure thought about QHMS?
@ QMSH
My dear, please allow me to apologize for not congratulating you on your historic win. What with all the drink baggery last night it seems I've forgotten my manners. So here's to you, I salute your victory. Of course I'm saluting with my third arm but it's a tribute none the less.
Speaking of I haven't seen this many pricks standing at attention since Hitler invaded Poland. Damn you're hot one girl!
Um Medusa shouldn't you be in church repenting for the weeks sins or collect bong water from the chapel sisterns or something?
My dear, please allow me to apologize for not congratulating you on your historic win. What with all the drink baggery last night it seems I've forgotten my manners. So here's to you, I salute your victory. Of course I'm saluting with my third arm but it's a tribute none the less.
Speaking of I haven't seen this many pricks standing at attention since Hitler invaded Poland. Damn you're hot one girl!
Um Medusa shouldn't you be in church repenting for the weeks sins or collect bong water from the chapel sisterns or something?
@ Laundry Gimp 7:38
Oh, you filthy little man-slut, you BETTER hold it in. Or I swear on your spleen I will scourge you with truck-tire blowout chunks from I-57. And what the hell are you doing on my computer? I survived the fall and I am watching you! When I get back I am going to trample you with rusty metal golf cleats and then pour gasoline into your gaping wounds. And then I will take said rabbit, which you mock, although a sorry worm like you could never do its job, and earfuck you until you bleed to death out your nose!!!
I'm struggling to decide which one of you regs is poating as Laundry Gimp. I guess the first clue would be which one of you is now furiously jerking off.
Oh, you filthy little man-slut, you BETTER hold it in. Or I swear on your spleen I will scourge you with truck-tire blowout chunks from I-57. And what the hell are you doing on my computer? I survived the fall and I am watching you! When I get back I am going to trample you with rusty metal golf cleats and then pour gasoline into your gaping wounds. And then I will take said rabbit, which you mock, although a sorry worm like you could never do its job, and earfuck you until you bleed to death out your nose!!!
I'm struggling to decide which one of you regs is poating as Laundry Gimp. I guess the first clue would be which one of you is now furiously jerking off.
@ d.baggins v.2.0 10:32
It probably wouldn't hurt if I did. Although I was forced to keep the no-goodery to a minimum this week as the blistering cold over Chicago keeps me out of heels and in the house. Which is a good a place as any to make mischief, but I legitimately suffered a semi-serious foot injury on Thursday night. It's left me stuck sitting on my ass and in rather foul spirits. Do pray for my tortured soul, though, if you make it to church yourself today. I hear that Holy Water makes for some wicked smooth bong hits.
It probably wouldn't hurt if I did. Although I was forced to keep the no-goodery to a minimum this week as the blistering cold over Chicago keeps me out of heels and in the house. Which is a good a place as any to make mischief, but I legitimately suffered a semi-serious foot injury on Thursday night. It's left me stuck sitting on my ass and in rather foul spirits. Do pray for my tortured soul, though, if you make it to church yourself today. I hear that Holy Water makes for some wicked smooth bong hits.
@ d. baggins v2.0 -
You say the sweetest things!
@ Medusa -
No, I don't think that makes you gay. As long as you don't think it makes ME gay if I'd disguise myself as a door-to-door saleswoman, knocking on every address in a 1000-mile radius looking for your home, just for a shot at trading places with your laundry gimp, so I can feel your cat o'nine tails while you fantasize that you're really whipping her.
You say the sweetest things!
@ Medusa -
No, I don't think that makes you gay. As long as you don't think it makes ME gay if I'd disguise myself as a door-to-door saleswoman, knocking on every address in a 1000-mile radius looking for your home, just for a shot at trading places with your laundry gimp, so I can feel your cat o'nine tails while you fantasize that you're really whipping her.
# posted by : 1:16 PM
: 1:16 PM
@Troy T.
I fail to see the problem with her hypothetical lack of teeth.
Sorry. Somebody had to go there. As long as I'm here: I'd pee in her butt.
I fail to see the problem with her hypothetical lack of teeth.
Sorry. Somebody had to go there. As long as I'm here: I'd pee in her butt.
@medusa, Mr. White
Fuck you both. It's time for this sub to become a dom. And it's gonna get real ugly around here.
Fuck you both. It's time for this sub to become a dom. And it's gonna get real ugly around here.
# posted by : 1:22 PM
: 1:22 PM
@ Idaho Hott
No, nothing gay about that. Stop by. I made meatloaf.
@ "Laundry Gimp"
Yeah, that's what I thought. I had my suspicions for while there. Ugly, huh? I won't disrespect DB1 and this forum by airing my personal grievances. However, were I to announce that I had some funny shit on my page, I'm sure the other hunters would be glad to check it out. Want your name, date of birth, mugshot, and a few amusing anecdotes about my dealings with you on my Blogger page? I can and will make that happen. Ask Scroteboy Slim how he liked it. Remember, I'm still smarter than you ever will be, and my memory is much, much longer. You know what I'm talking about.
No, nothing gay about that. Stop by. I made meatloaf.
@ "Laundry Gimp"
Yeah, that's what I thought. I had my suspicions for while there. Ugly, huh? I won't disrespect DB1 and this forum by airing my personal grievances. However, were I to announce that I had some funny shit on my page, I'm sure the other hunters would be glad to check it out. Want your name, date of birth, mugshot, and a few amusing anecdotes about my dealings with you on my Blogger page? I can and will make that happen. Ask Scroteboy Slim how he liked it. Remember, I'm still smarter than you ever will be, and my memory is much, much longer. You know what I'm talking about.
I looked up "Takin' it to yhe next level" in the dictionary, and there was your comment on Mia Sara.
# posted by : 2:38 PM
: 2:38 PM
100% no doubt about her worthiness.....but then there's mine, and by that, I mean my worthiness of licking her toes after she walked through a field of.....well, it doesn't matter, really.
Call me skeptical, but the new photo looks an awful lot like Valentina Vaughn.
# posted by : 5:34 PM
: 5:34 PM
If my wife wasn't sitting in the chair next to me I'd mention what I'd do to Quartasian... SPLLOOOOSH!
# posted by : 6:43 PM
: 6:43 PM
@medusa
Oh yeah, Medusa? Wanna reveal my identity? Go for it. I think a Mr. and Mrs. McCormick in Terre Haute, Indiana, would be very interested to hear that their son is still alive. In fact, I bet the FBI would be interested, too. We'll see how you like kidnapping and child endangerment charges!
Oh yeah, Medusa? Wanna reveal my identity? Go for it. I think a Mr. and Mrs. McCormick in Terre Haute, Indiana, would be very interested to hear that their son is still alive. In fact, I bet the FBI would be interested, too. We'll see how you like kidnapping and child endangerment charges!
# posted by : 1:17 AM
: 1:17 AM
You sons of bitches and your hackneyed mother jokes. You're bringing this website down.
dark sock's mom is so old she had to wait for the BIG BANG for her existence to start counting.
dark sock's mom is so old she had to wait for the BIG BANG for her existence to start counting.
@ laundry Gimp
Oh, shut up and finish the sheets. Don't forget the fabric softener this time, you drooling idiot. And go get some meds, fer chrissakes, how many times to I have to tell you? As if I would even associate with anyone from Terre Haute. Feh.
Oh, shut up and finish the sheets. Don't forget the fabric softener this time, you drooling idiot. And go get some meds, fer chrissakes, how many times to I have to tell you? As if I would even associate with anyone from Terre Haute. Feh.
Yeah medusa, you think you're all hot to trot, but you know you like to slum it in Terre Haute, and now everybody else does, too.
And I'll use fabric softener, all right. But I'm going to use the shitty generic kind instead of Snuggle. Take that!
And I'll use fabric softener, all right. But I'm going to use the shitty generic kind instead of Snuggle. Take that!
# posted by : 10:55 AM
: 10:55 AM
I thought I heard extra heavy breathing on the phone. If you want phone sex with Donk, set up your own time!
# posted by : 11:05 AM
: 11:05 AM
No thanks...between the two of you grunting and trying to figure out how to work the zipper on your pants, I'd get pretty bored.
Oh, medusa, I hate fighting with you. If I'm good, will you use the waffle iron on my ass again?
# posted by : 11:16 AM
: 11:16 AM
What a lousy sub you are. Being good gets you benign neglect. Being bad gets you the punishment you so richly deserve. Besides, Mr. White and Ash hate it when the waffles taste like burnt ass. Maybe the curling iron is more appropriate. It's insertable.
I told you that a little cinnamon covers up the burnt ass taste!
(What does that sass-back get me?)
(What does that sass-back get me?)
# posted by : 11:42 AM
: 11:42 AM
Holy balls, if I had seen this photo during the HCWDBotY voting rounds, I would've voted for Deathtongue many, many times over.
I would gladly dive repeatedly into a baby pool filled with broken glass and coral snakes while listening to Amy Grant at full volume just for the chance to buy her fat friend from high school a steak dinner....I think her name was Debbie.
-Douche Leto Atreides
I would gladly dive repeatedly into a baby pool filled with broken glass and coral snakes while listening to Amy Grant at full volume just for the chance to buy her fat friend from high school a steak dinner....I think her name was Debbie.
-Douche Leto Atreides
# posted by : 2:20 PM
: 2:20 PM
QMSH with a well deserved victory. She has the sensually cold stare of a Peri from Persian mythology. I will do anything for you QMSH to help you complete your penance, allowing you entry into paradise rightfully deserved. QMSH shirts? Anybody got a line on that?
# posted by : 3:04 PM
: 3:04 PM
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# posted by : 5:46 PM
: 5:46 PM
that is...uhm...fla...flawless...i uh...um...uh...wow...i was an awkward and easily flustered kid, i've gotten over that thanks to the magic of beer, but this face, even just on my monitor is making me all mumbly
# posted by : 6:20 PM
: 6:20 PM
I voted for April, even though I normally go for brunettes.
I now repent of that position.
I now repent of that position.
# posted by : 5:57 AM
: 5:57 AM
Can I still punish Laundry Gimp for making my waffles taste like ass even if I'm being a sub? I loves me some waffles, but not ass waffles and I don't take kindly to waffle defilers.
This picture shows me what all of you were talking about during the yearly. It is obvious now she is truly deserving. Perhaps its that the douche has finally detached himself from her face. Now, someone make her stop looking at me cause she's making me feel funny inside...
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This picture shows me what all of you were talking about during the yearly. It is obvious now she is truly deserving. Perhaps its that the douche has finally detached himself from her face. Now, someone make her stop looking at me cause she's making me feel funny inside...
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