Monday, November 24, 2008
Being DJ Bellovich
You're invited. Step into the portal, enter the brain and see through the eyes of Bello. Aka Bobby Batz. DJ to the stars. MTV Real World hopeful.
Check. Check.
What's that? You never wondered what it's like to be Bello? Then click not, adventurer. For horrors await.
WARNING: Watching this video causes uncontrollable diarrhea in lab rats. It is the Ringu of douche videos. One week after watching, a phone will ring, and you will have an uncontrollable urge to step-dance.
WARNING #2: No, I'm serious. Watch this at your own risk.
WARNING #3: As with most Bello videos, there are no hotts.
WARNING #4: There is a surprise ending. It is uber-poo.
WARNING #5: If you complain after viewing that you're now sterile, hate life and beat up a small orphan boy on the streets of Bangledesh as a result of subsequent video-rage, HCwDB reminds you that you were warned.
WARNING #6: No seriously. It's that bad.
Comments:
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That is the saddest excuse for living quarters I have seen in a long time. And when was the last time those assholes cleaned that bathroom mirror? It looks like the window of the microwave after the gremlin exploded in it in the first Gremlins movie.
# posted by 
: 7:12 AM
: 7:12 AM
"Step into the portal, enter the brain....."
Hey, wait a minute!
At least he hasn't shut the comments off yet. ; )
Hey, wait a minute!
At least he hasn't shut the comments off yet. ; )
WHAT THE FUCK,WHAT A HONKER ON THAT GUY.NO WAY HE GETS ON MTV REAL WORLD.WHAT A DOUCHE.MUST BE A FRIEND OF fung
# posted by : 7:15 AM
: 7:15 AM
Guess I am going to have to bypass my company's YouTube block to check this out...IF it is that bad.
here's a tip Bobby Batz:
clean your fucking bathroom mirror.
man, this video is just terrible.
thanks for starting off a short week like this DB1. i'm going to go pour hot coffee into my eyes now.
clean your fucking bathroom mirror.
man, this video is just terrible.
thanks for starting off a short week like this DB1. i'm going to go pour hot coffee into my eyes now.
Where the hell is the furniture in that house? Spend less on axe and shitty jeans and buy some furniture you douchie puss pocket.
I feel bad for the dog on the patio/porch.
-asshat
I feel bad for the dog on the patio/porch.
-asshat
# posted by : 7:32 AM
: 7:32 AM
What the hell is with the towel bars hung at forehead height? doubling as f'n hat racks?
These fucking mold spores are the reason America sucks right now. Everyone has to be so god damned self important. Cum bubbles like these guys are living off the fat of America. Now that times are getting tougher - these no talent ass clowns will know what it's like to be uneducated and unemployable.
Jesus - somebody shoot me.
-asshat
p.s. clean the broken mirror in the bathroom. f'n dirty animals.
These fucking mold spores are the reason America sucks right now. Everyone has to be so god damned self important. Cum bubbles like these guys are living off the fat of America. Now that times are getting tougher - these no talent ass clowns will know what it's like to be uneducated and unemployable.
Jesus - somebody shoot me.
-asshat
p.s. clean the broken mirror in the bathroom. f'n dirty animals.
# posted by : 7:37 AM
: 7:37 AM
i would love to watch this kid get beheaded like nick berg. the screaming, gurgling mix of jugular blood and saliva shooting forth from his slowly sliced throat as he screamed in terror for the last 30 agonizing seconds of his life would warm my soul like a hot cup of spicy chai.
Does he call himself Dj Bello or Dj Swallow?!?!
Because the last time I saw something that gay it was curled up on an oversized couch with a cup of camoimille tea in his hand and talking about interior design theory.
Because the last time I saw something that gay it was curled up on an oversized couch with a cup of camoimille tea in his hand and talking about interior design theory.
who wears white fucking flip-flops? really? who does that?
and what guy goes around recording his boys with their shirts off dancing around the apartment before going out? be a man; have a a jack and coke and get your ass out of the house.
and what guy goes around recording his boys with their shirts off dancing around the apartment before going out? be a man; have a a jack and coke and get your ass out of the house.
At the end of the video, it looks like he's wearing his mommies shoes?!
Someone should ice this clown!
Someone should ice this clown!
# posted by : 8:01 AM
: 8:01 AM
Flip flops.
FLIP FLOPS!
And the outfit's stolen, he sez. Classy.
This contained more homo-eroticism that "Brokeback Mountain: The Musical on Ice", featuring Chase Crawford and Zac Efron.
And latina gang members everywhere are watching this clip over and over to admire his eyebrows.
I don't know whether to call the ASPCA to rescue that dog or Blackwater Cleaning Services to cleanse that apartment. And by cleanse I mean "make everything disappear forever".
Cause you know that landlord's totally keeping that security deposit.
This little buttloaf just leapfrogged to the top running slot in every category of the Douchies. Damn, that's impressive.
GAHHH!!!
FLIP FLOPS!
And the outfit's stolen, he sez. Classy.
This contained more homo-eroticism that "Brokeback Mountain: The Musical on Ice", featuring Chase Crawford and Zac Efron.
And latina gang members everywhere are watching this clip over and over to admire his eyebrows.
I don't know whether to call the ASPCA to rescue that dog or Blackwater Cleaning Services to cleanse that apartment. And by cleanse I mean "make everything disappear forever".
Cause you know that landlord's totally keeping that security deposit.
This little buttloaf just leapfrogged to the top running slot in every category of the Douchies. Damn, that's impressive.
GAHHH!!!
Great.
I had nothing to lose, so I checked out the "Bobby Batz" video.
That apartment must carry the stench of soiled boxers, dog pee, three weeks' worth of Little Caesar's pizza boxes and Taco bell trash, feet, and douchepoo.
Yeah, that'll bring the chicks home.
I had nothing to lose, so I checked out the "Bobby Batz" video.
That apartment must carry the stench of soiled boxers, dog pee, three weeks' worth of Little Caesar's pizza boxes and Taco bell trash, feet, and douchepoo.
Yeah, that'll bring the chicks home.
Did he call his friend a nigga? The only black friend he has is the bouncer. And he wants to punch him in the fuckin face
# posted by : 8:42 AM
: 8:42 AM
@Senor Squash-
Buttloaf... I love that. My goal for today is to work the word "buttloaf" into polite conversation. Wish me luck!
I hope those little boys stop fawning over each other long enough to occasionally give that poor dog food and clean water.
Buttloaf... I love that. My goal for today is to work the word "buttloaf" into polite conversation. Wish me luck!
I hope those little boys stop fawning over each other long enough to occasionally give that poor dog food and clean water.
# posted by : 9:05 AM
: 9:05 AM
His little universe has it's own gravitational pull. You have to fight from being sucked in.
Also, this video had some surprising homoerotic undertones.
Also, this video had some surprising homoerotic undertones.
# posted by : 9:15 AM
: 9:15 AM
Couldn't make it through the video, started shaking and got nauseous. I'm serious.
# posted by : 9:26 AM
: 9:26 AM
DB1 just give him every fucking douchie award except any award having to do with a Hott. They should be a new award for the biggest homo douche.
# posted by : 9:27 AM
: 9:27 AM
It just hit me.
These guys truly have no idea that they are gay. Each and every one of them.
"Look at that body..."
There is more sexual tension in that molded hovel than a gay scoutmaster judging a male skating competition.
These guys truly have no idea that they are gay. Each and every one of them.
"Look at that body..."
There is more sexual tension in that molded hovel than a gay scoutmaster judging a male skating competition.
HA HA, i wish this video were an hour long. the indigenous douchebags in their natural stupid habitat. awesome. you couldn't have fewer brain cells than these choads if you did acid every day for thirty years!
That wasn't nearly as bad as the "Brokencyde" video from yesterday. I'm still not over the jibblies I got from that one.
# posted by : 9:49 AM
: 9:49 AM
This was just atrocious. I hope he gets on Real World. And then some black guy beats him to near death for calling him his nigga.
Later that evening they all put on sweat bands, stood in a circle, and jerked each other off while staring at each others abs.
"Come on dogs, we gotta get the pressure out. D'y'all see those hotts in da club tonight. And that one guy...man he was so jacked up. I bet he could bench like 300 lbs. He could lift me like nothing...not that I'm thinking about it or nothin'. Heh Heh I ain't no gay...ugh Jerry can you spit on your hand a little?"
End Scene.
"Come on dogs, we gotta get the pressure out. D'y'all see those hotts in da club tonight. And that one guy...man he was so jacked up. I bet he could bench like 300 lbs. He could lift me like nothing...not that I'm thinking about it or nothin'. Heh Heh I ain't no gay...ugh Jerry can you spit on your hand a little?"
End Scene.
That's horrid. It's worse than my dog's ass after getting into a bowl of five alarm chili. How does your bathroom mirror get that dirty? I refuse to believe any girl would actually take off her shoes, let alone her clothes, in this living space. There's probably a colony of wall people that will kidnap them as soon as they walk in.
@Senor Squash - I second the closet case motion. Maybe if some good samaritan were to drop a note to Blackwater advising them that the terrorist group Bell Qaedo's (my translators tell me this means "kisses of poo") headquarters is in this building they would do the clean up for free.
@Senor Squash - I second the closet case motion. Maybe if some good samaritan were to drop a note to Blackwater advising them that the terrorist group Bell Qaedo's (my translators tell me this means "kisses of poo") headquarters is in this building they would do the clean up for free.
Welcome to Turd Town, population 3.
(Alternatively, Scrote City, Doucheville, etc.)
(Alternatively, Scrote City, Doucheville, etc.)
# posted by : 10:10 AM
: 10:10 AM
At least the dog admits the fact that he would hump other male dogs in the face if he got the chance. (I'm guessing.)
# posted by : 10:17 AM
: 10:17 AM
so, like the idiot i am, i watched the video again.
the furniture, general uncleanliness, and decor would lead me to believe these 3 are all roommates living on the bottom floor of an apartment complex that was built in the late 80's in Arizona.
but, i could be wrong.
the furniture, general uncleanliness, and decor would lead me to believe these 3 are all roommates living on the bottom floor of an apartment complex that was built in the late 80's in Arizona.
but, i could be wrong.
the general pooiness is all encompassing. and to think this is the apex of their development. we will continue to pay for this perhaps indefinitely. send this fine lads on a peace keeping mission in the congo with the u.n. stat!
Aw MAN - the video stops before the best part. The Hills Have Eyes mutants bust in and gang rape the lot of 'em.
At least that's what happens when I go to my happy place. Don't rent it at Blockbuster, though, cuz they cut out the part where the power auger is "in da howz."
At least that's what happens when I go to my happy place. Don't rent it at Blockbuster, though, cuz they cut out the part where the power auger is "in da howz."
This kid is a turd. Flat out. Quetion. If your so "pimp" and "fly" then why is your condo/house furnished with such exquisit and classy furniture ?! Just a question .... playa .... hahaha. Such a douche !
# posted by : 11:32 AM
: 11:32 AM
That...wow...I...just...lost...the...will..to..live...
Anyone wondering what's wrong with this country? Have them watch this video.
The three of them bu-fu each other regularly and those bitches need to go to Value City & get some furniture.
The last time I saw something this gay, it was dancing to Beyonce's "Single Ladies" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGemjUvafBw
Anyone wondering what's wrong with this country? Have them watch this video.
The three of them bu-fu each other regularly and those bitches need to go to Value City & get some furniture.
The last time I saw something this gay, it was dancing to Beyonce's "Single Ladies" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGemjUvafBw
Bobby Batz and bobbing for bats...
DJ Bello and BJs below....
Not a coincidence. And they should really stop jacking off to themselves in the mirror. Or at least clean the damn thing. Well I guess that's how you savor the flavor. Most of all I feel sorry for the dog. They come home drunk and horny and alone, and then the peanut butter comes out.... That dog must really be tired of them making a candy apple out of his red rocket.
DJ Bello and BJs below....
Not a coincidence. And they should really stop jacking off to themselves in the mirror. Or at least clean the damn thing. Well I guess that's how you savor the flavor. Most of all I feel sorry for the dog. They come home drunk and horny and alone, and then the peanut butter comes out.... That dog must really be tired of them making a candy apple out of his red rocket.
Those guys just ned to jump on out of the closet. I haven't seen gayer in a loooonnnng time.
- Douchey Smurf
- Douchey Smurf
# posted by : 11:39 AM
: 11:39 AM
After techno dancing practice, and ab work out the DJ Bello crew relax with blow jobs from each other
# posted by : 11:54 AM
: 11:54 AM
A key indicator that you are NOT a baller: You've removed the speakerbox out of the trunk of the '98 Chevy Cavalier your parents handed down to you and put it in your otherwise empty living room so you could do a little warm-up dancing with your male topless roommate.
Hey Bello, I fucking dare you to show this video to your stepdad.
Hey Bello, I fucking dare you to show this video to your stepdad.
# posted by : 12:30 PM
: 12:30 PM
Holy flaming porcupine shit. That mirror. How does he tweeze his eyebrows so meticulously while staring into what seems to be a stucco wall? Well, maybe that protective coating of toothpaste crud and rocket-pimple pop would soften the cuts from when I smash him face-first into the glass.
Wow. Not nice. But again, that's the jet lag talking.
Hi, wheeze, how goes it? Good to see ya.
Wow. Not nice. But again, that's the jet lag talking.
Hi, wheeze, how goes it? Good to see ya.
We only encourage this assclown by watching his poor excuse for a life on you tube. If we don't watch, soon he will cease to exist....or at least cease to make u-tube videos.
# posted by : 1:26 PM
: 1:26 PM
You know in that underrated flick The Arrival starring Charlie Sheen where the aliens have that metallic ball thingy that spins around Zane Zaminsky's garage and destroys all of his stuff like some kind of vacuum? That needs to happen to this shithole.
# posted by : 3:57 PM
: 3:57 PM
Ugh. I lasted through about 0:45.
He's too busy admiring his boys and their packages to "get those bitches every fucking day."
And I feel like he's building up the opaque crust on his mirror so he can avoid having to look himself in the face every morning after he and his boys have a "residents only" orgy in their apartment.
He's too busy admiring his boys and their packages to "get those bitches every fucking day."
And I feel like he's building up the opaque crust on his mirror so he can avoid having to look himself in the face every morning after he and his boys have a "residents only" orgy in their apartment.
# posted by : 4:59 PM
: 4:59 PM
HEY DB1, no more foreplay featured gay porn scenes! In Part 2 of 5, one of the "boyz" wraps his wang between his legs and looks in the full length mirror.
# posted by : 5:01 PM
: 5:01 PM
@ wheeze
Oh, quite. A lifelong dream realized....a delightful social experience, a breathtaking visual feast of arts and architecture, a curious epicurean excursion. And a whole lot of subversive shit.
Oh, quite. A lifelong dream realized....a delightful social experience, a breathtaking visual feast of arts and architecture, a curious epicurean excursion. And a whole lot of subversive shit.
We are the Caninoids from the star system Sirius. No, we're serious. Every 100 of your Earth years we send a representative to your planet to assess your development. To you, we look like your common pet dogs but we possess advanced technology. One of our representatives was pictured in this video. Despite his sickened state at being sequestered with what we believe to be a typical sample of your population he has passed summary judgement. We have viewed your classic film 'The Arrival' and duplicated the vortex device depicted there. We have scaled it from garage to planet strength. Make peace with your various religious icons. rrrgh, Goodbye.
# posted by : 6:27 PM
: 6:27 PM
Of all the planets I have landed
on...I never thought I would land
on planet Gay. These guys are one
step away from "docking" penis
with each other....
on...I never thought I would land
on planet Gay. These guys are one
step away from "docking" penis
with each other....
Guess what, James, they already HAVE docked penis with each other.
Giving asshat an even more vigorous meaning.
Giving asshat an even more vigorous meaning.
# posted by : 7:16 PM
: 7:16 PM
That poor dog, all cuddled up on his blankie-poo...
Now, if DJ were to film this with the lights out, exactly how many roaches and silverfish would come marching from Pretoria?
Or to Peoria?
Or in horror-ia?
Out of his ass-toria?
In a plethor-i-a?
Bobby Batz needs to graduate to hard-core-ia!!!
DB1, Please, NO-MORE-IA!!
Now, if DJ were to film this with the lights out, exactly how many roaches and silverfish would come marching from Pretoria?
Or to Peoria?
Or in horror-ia?
Out of his ass-toria?
In a plethor-i-a?
Bobby Batz needs to graduate to hard-core-ia!!!
DB1, Please, NO-MORE-IA!!
# posted by : 7:30 PM
: 7:30 PM
You know, I have gay friends that I hang out with and we've had some great times.
It's because of that good friendship that I won't share this clip with them.
Because they'd hunt this kid down and wax their truck with him.
It's because of that good friendship that I won't share this clip with them.
Because they'd hunt this kid down and wax their truck with him.
Wow...you couldn't have planned a douche video any better. White belts a-poppin', cocked hats, kissy lips, ab displays, super gay thong shoes, "I like to pretend I'm from the hood" lingo, lame "dance" moves...the list goes on and on. Hopefully that was an anti-douche guard dog outside the door waiting to bite these mega tools in the ass if they actually try leaving their apartment. It's just simply mind-boggling that some people act this way completely sober with nobody coercing them using a pair of vice-grips to the balls. Amazing
# posted by : 9:12 PM
: 9:12 PM
Said it before and I'll say it again. DJ Bello - Douchebag of the Year and Lifetime poster child of Summers Eve Douche!
# posted by : 9:34 PM
: 9:34 PM
The dance steps are priceless!
P.S.
The spelling is Bangladesh I think, with an a.
P.S.
The spelling is Bangladesh I think, with an a.
# posted by : 10:13 PM
: 10:13 PM
Why don't I listen to the warnings...I have a dream, a dream where this choad get his arse beat by an angry Lou Ferenghi, its not a particularly long dream but its satisfying.
Sweet jesus he is poo. Removing my eye balls with a claw hammer heated to 360 degrees celsius would be sweet, sweet heaven compared to watching this guy in action.
Total Dickbag.
And that bathrooms disgusting.
Total Dickbag.
And that bathrooms disgusting.
Holy lol.
I just laughed myself silly, and am left with nothing poignant or sarcastic to say.
DJ Bello, I am laughing AT you. AT you, nobody you see laughing is doing so WITH you.
bwahahahahahahaha
I just laughed myself silly, and am left with nothing poignant or sarcastic to say.
DJ Bello, I am laughing AT you. AT you, nobody you see laughing is doing so WITH you.
bwahahahahahahaha
@ Anon 6:27 PM
That was creative.
I imagine an "Independence Day"-like scenario, where peaceful E. T.s fly into a mindless killing-spree upon witnessing disheartening sights like these.
President: I know there is much to learn from each other. Get a load of this clip. We could teach you DJ Bello dance moves.
Aliens: DIE!!!
That was creative.
I imagine an "Independence Day"-like scenario, where peaceful E. T.s fly into a mindless killing-spree upon witnessing disheartening sights like these.
President: I know there is much to learn from each other. Get a load of this clip. We could teach you DJ Bello dance moves.
Aliens: DIE!!!
# posted by : 5:40 AM
: 5:40 AM
in the immortal words of a baghunter,
"I stand in awe, quivering in a pool of what appears to be my own urine"....because Dj Bello blew a kiss at me. I wish to die now.
"I stand in awe, quivering in a pool of what appears to be my own urine"....because Dj Bello blew a kiss at me. I wish to die now.
I have never commented on this site before....until now. I was sitting here at work and thought "there is no way it can be THAT bad". Oh, was I mistaken. It will take months to get the taste of vomit out of my mouth now. I would rather watch Tim Cappello sing "I still believe" in the Lost Boys a thousnd times than this toolbag
# posted by : 12:39 PM
: 12:39 PM
Correction he just closed his account on youtube....man that sux. I had just commented on how terrible one of the videos was too :(
# posted by : 1:06 PM
: 1:06 PM
I'm sure he'll open another account, we must be wise enough to find it. and by wise, I mean retarded.
# posted by : 8:23 PM
: 8:23 PM
don't be mad men, he is still here:
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.Channel&ChannelID=168429391
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.Channel&ChannelID=168429391
# posted by : 9:25 PM
: 9:25 PM
ahhhh I found one that you may have never seen by IT! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8N99MWUKavU
# posted by : 10:02 PM
: 10:02 PM
Thanks, Huey!!!
And y'all need to check out RobHottie's (that other dude in the McDonald's frolic video) car.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLMHmTS_B7s
A 1993 5point0.
Srsly.
And y'all need to check out RobHottie's (that other dude in the McDonald's frolic video) car.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLMHmTS_B7s
A 1993 5point0.
Srsly.
just to make sure you're all aware of it... as djBello willingly will prove to anyone who is interested or just happens to be online by accident, he's a total douche. fine. but dont underestimate the cultural wave he surfs on when doing his silly dance moves. he's clearly only a beginner and still tries to incorporate some real gangsta elements stemming from his hip-hop-hardy dresscode. anyway, the inventors of douche, namely the dutch and belgians have enjoyed this kind of riverdance on pills for a couple of years. just look for jumpstyle on youtube, or follow this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyAvaLsLFl8
but i warn you, this kids are serious.
but i warn you, this kids are serious.
# posted by : 6:13 AM
: 6:13 AM
never mind the video above, this one is it, IT!
i think this may be a whole new species of euroscrote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4bX5LyC6vw&NR=1
i think this may be a whole new species of euroscrote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4bX5LyC6vw&NR=1
# posted by : 6:17 AM
: 6:17 AM
Is it true? Is he really gone? I don't know if I should be happy or sad. On one hand I feel like a major scrote influence is now gone, other the other hand He was freaken hilarious.
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# posted by : 4:31 AM
: 4:31 AM << Home
