Friday, September 19, 2008
Whither the Wendys?
Another Friday in Los Angeles.
The fog lifts over the mid afternoon traffic like a Peking opera revealing a dancing Chou. The city sweats like a schizophrenic ferret trapped in a dryer. Set on high.
The people, trapped in their cars on the 405, ranting and raving because traffic sucks. I gaze at the smog. And I chuckle.
I sip some semi-flat Mr. Pibb out of a Big Gulp and contemplate the rare Wendys Hold + 'Bag Hand Gesture that Flippy here is demonstrating for us.
Whither Flippy's trip to Wendys?, I ask myself.
As he pollutes a sweet, soft ball of soft brown hair and large smile that looks cuddly and playful and a bit scratchy, I can't help but wonder.
Was the Wendy's run the pinnacle of the evening? Or an impromptu stop after winning the fuzzy dice at the local fair playing The Whack-a-Mole?
I know not how these formations occur in a society confused by fragment and disjoint. A culture overwashed by odors for sale on every street corner to embody the eros magnified by television and magazine.
But even flat, my Mr. Pibb consoles me.
For it is like Dr. Pepper. Only different.
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"SJ" = Scrote-Jag
"F" = "Fucknut"
Now for her top.....what doth it read? Verily might I needeth an entire eve to unravel the mystery.....and her legs.
"F" = "Fucknut"
Now for her top.....what doth it read? Verily might I needeth an entire eve to unravel the mystery.....and her legs.
My apologies Don't Wheeze.
For that is my seed that has landed safely on her shirt.
...yes, my seed glitters. Not in a Gary Glitter sense, mind you. But in the sense that I ate a box of Pop Rocks® this morning.
For that is my seed that has landed safely on her shirt.
...yes, my seed glitters. Not in a Gary Glitter sense, mind you. But in the sense that I ate a box of Pop Rocks® this morning.
Dear DB1,
Very nice rant BTW. I know this is slightly off topic, but others have raised similar concerns:
On Wednesdays past, you posted limericks
And we all turned in our lyrical tricks
But on one darkened day
Limericks all went away
And forced us instead to fondle our sticks.
Not that waxing my stick is such a bad thing
It’s just that it’s chaff from high volume stroking
But a lyrical salute
Rends my member astute
And closing the rhyme leaves my spine a’ tingling.
Okay, me be quiet now. A Maker's toast to all. See you on Monday!
Very nice rant BTW. I know this is slightly off topic, but others have raised similar concerns:
On Wednesdays past, you posted limericks
And we all turned in our lyrical tricks
But on one darkened day
Limericks all went away
And forced us instead to fondle our sticks.
Not that waxing my stick is such a bad thing
It’s just that it’s chaff from high volume stroking
But a lyrical salute
Rends my member astute
And closing the rhyme leaves my spine a’ tingling.
Okay, me be quiet now. A Maker's toast to all. See you on Monday!
bout time you pulled out a friday thoughts db1. makes my weekend just a little bit more special.
just not enough in me right now to hate this dude. god bless ya kid.
it's friday night, and the cool autumn air is ripe with possibility.
either that or it's poo, i can't tell nowadays.
great weekends to all, may your drinks be stiff and your women loose.
just not enough in me right now to hate this dude. god bless ya kid.
it's friday night, and the cool autumn air is ripe with possibility.
either that or it's poo, i can't tell nowadays.
great weekends to all, may your drinks be stiff and your women loose.
I'm partial to Dr. Thunder, WalMart's generic answer to Dr. Pepper.
It has 200 % more unpronouncable chemicals in it than DP and is probably bottle (canned) in a south of the border cardboard shanty town using sewage runoff from a low wage lead paint toy manufacturing plant up stream in Juarez along with 23 spices grown in the feces of the local goat farm.
All this for $1.89 a twelver. Nice.
It has 200 % more unpronouncable chemicals in it than DP and is probably bottle (canned) in a south of the border cardboard shanty town using sewage runoff from a low wage lead paint toy manufacturing plant up stream in Juarez along with 23 spices grown in the feces of the local goat farm.
All this for $1.89 a twelver. Nice.
wow. she is like a little dream surrounded by a horrible nightmare. i think he's saying that he likes wendy's. when deez nutz are on his lips.
# posted by 
: 3:57 PM
: 3:57 PM
@massengill -
Aw shit, powder blueche "Cheeks" pissed me off with his bastardization of a White Sox cap, and now that? Ugggggh.
Though I have to say you were spot-on in the comparison.....
Aw shit, powder blueche "Cheeks" pissed me off with his bastardization of a White Sox cap, and now that? Ugggggh.
Though I have to say you were spot-on in the comparison.....
@crucial -
Stuff happens. I guess all that glitters is not choad, unless it's your spunk on a hott's lovely mounds.
But you apparently have a talent for sort of a reversal of the ol' "writing one's name in the snow" thing, huh?
Stuff happens. I guess all that glitters is not choad, unless it's your spunk on a hott's lovely mounds.
But you apparently have a talent for sort of a reversal of the ol' "writing one's name in the snow" thing, huh?
Absolutely - transplant to Cincinnati for 14 years after 2 years in Denver. Not a *Chicagoland* native, mind you - "Da Bears" have training camp in my hometown.
So you are from Lake Forest. I live in Cincinnati, too. I'm originally from NW Indiana though, my dad grew up in Chicago and raised me to be a Sox fan.
# posted by : 4:11 PM
: 4:11 PM
I suspect that she's been date-raped so many times that she's become addicted to GBH. Elsewise, why the smile in the face of douchedom?
# posted by : 4:17 PM
: 4:17 PM
Actually, the Bears have trained in "downstate" Bourbonnais (near Kankakee) for the past couple of years. There's really nothing else there, though. For now, though, it's "the southern side of Cincinnati" for me.
Yeah, being a Sox fan is tough in that area unless you're with others of the same persuasion. It seems a "given" that you're supposed to be a Cubs fan, though no one can ever specify a decent reason. Hanging out in an ivy-covered beer garden isn't enough.
Yeah, being a Sox fan is tough in that area unless you're with others of the same persuasion. It seems a "given" that you're supposed to be a Cubs fan, though no one can ever specify a decent reason. Hanging out in an ivy-covered beer garden isn't enough.
Well, Wrigley is pretty steeped in baseball history. And it's not in the middle of the PJs.
# posted by : 4:22 PM
: 4:22 PM
'Tis true - I guess I would rather be in Wrigleyville at night than near 35th & Shields. Ah well. An "L Series" would be pretty interesting.
Out here in SD there is an infamous bar called "LIPS"
It's a tranny bar and its nice to see that young chap has a souvenir from his last visit.
It's a tranny bar and its nice to see that young chap has a souvenir from his last visit.
Chablis from a mini screw top bottle = classy.
He is merely picking up douche pieces. Not quite there yet. Each paycheck goes to a douche mark. 1) Ear bling, 2) wrist dial and 3) that stupid belt buckle. He's still in his probationary period workin' at Wendy's and she just picked him up from work so he didn't have to bus it.
Keep with it padawan, you can make it.
They are poor. I don't pick on the poor.
He is merely picking up douche pieces. Not quite there yet. Each paycheck goes to a douche mark. 1) Ear bling, 2) wrist dial and 3) that stupid belt buckle. He's still in his probationary period workin' at Wendy's and she just picked him up from work so he didn't have to bus it.
Keep with it padawan, you can make it.
They are poor. I don't pick on the poor.
About the only thing this picture inspires me to do is hang the bananas on a ripening rack, finish my Wendy's Frosty, and ask Monk if he'll kindly solve the mystery on his Friday night show, which will be on not that long from now...
# posted by : 5:21 PM
: 5:21 PM
@ Darksock-
Per your Run to the Hills comment on the last entry:
I went for a jog this afternoon and as you can imagine one of the first tunes I put on my ipod was "run to the hills"
It's kinda funny that the lyrics seem to be about Native Americans whilst being written by a pasty englishman.
Army of Douche-ness
p.s. I raise my URC to all this weekend!
Per your Run to the Hills comment on the last entry:
I went for a jog this afternoon and as you can imagine one of the first tunes I put on my ipod was "run to the hills"
It's kinda funny that the lyrics seem to be about Native Americans whilst being written by a pasty englishman.
Army of Douche-ness
p.s. I raise my URC to all this weekend!
# posted by : 5:46 PM
: 5:46 PM
Sweet, gotta love it when your submission makes the site. As Hedburg says, Mr. Pibb is a replica of Dr. Pepper. . . but it's a bullshit replica becasue the dude didn't even get his degree. Flippy is a bullshit replica.
Also, I wish for the hotte and I to engage in coitus.
Also, I wish for the hotte and I to engage in coitus.
She's the lost jackson sister, with vidilaigo, and a bad breath problem from blowing too many wendys patrons.
@ san juan yankee douche, sprinkling pixie dust on your junk doesn't make it bigger... it just signals twinks you want it groped
@ DB1, the natives still call it the San Diego Fwy
@ hot salsa latina splendor, let me merge my I 95 with your super hwy!
@ DB1, the natives still call it the San Diego Fwy
@ hot salsa latina splendor, let me merge my I 95 with your super hwy!
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# posted by : 6:40 PM
: 6:40 PM << Home
