Nice Fletch reference, DB1!!!

I'd like to borrow her towel, my car just hit a water buffalo.
 

No doubt he drives an Oldsmobuick.
 

Very nice Fletch reference. He is more like a poo-filled buffalo. She has very nice underhills.
 

Put it on the Underhill's bill.

Choad the Douche Sprocket
 

two portions of caviar for miss stanwyck at 80 dollars a pop. she is that hott.
but i'm not sure this scotch-romanian gut sucking wannabe tennis pro is a douche of any real consequence.

-haberdouchery
 

"that things got my blood to boiling."
 

Side boob. She needs to touch up her roots though. Methinks the carpet is dark...
 

She's avoiding him to make eye contact with me. Do you sense that? I do. I'm going to break his shadow's finger though.

Honey bunches of Scrotes
 

He's not beyond hope, though he reeks of smug. Get him a Real Beer and the rehabilitaion could begin today.

She is wonderful.
 

This is the age of Dis-Enlightenment, where Uber-Scrotes are able to pass their germs through the aural cavity while the victim smiles totally oblivious of the transfer.

See also: Necrotizing ulcerative gingivitis.

Where the rich bleeth encourages leopard poaching, and where I insist on showing her exactly where her pubococcygeus muscles are located.
 

I actually like those shorts.

I like the cheetah bikini better, for a very different reason.
 

I just finished dry humping my chimney flue after witnessing that side boob and cleavite. She’s top shelf even if that dolphin’s fleeing her Discovery Cove.


Oh, and sporting your teeny cock ring on your necklace for all to see may need to be rethought next time, brahski!
 

@crucial head

I believe that's actually the famous 'Foreskin of Jesus' hanging there...
 

Head chew + ab flex + hand signal/ (holding drink) = Douchebag Multitasking.
 

JCVD -

Makes sense. It couldn't be mine. I left it halfway up my chimney.

Santa's in for one hell of a surprise this year.
 

The Milky Way is the discarded foreskin of Xenu.
 

oh, and bring me the head of alfredo garcia.
 

Wait, if Santa felates my foreskin on his way down my chimney, does that make me...

Naw...

No way...

It couldn't...
 

@crucial head

hahahaha...

I hope Santa's been hitting the gym this year for your sake...and for mine too I've been (semi)good all year and he agreed to give me a Lolo Jones Real Doll.
 

":She needs to touch up her roots though. Methinks the carpet is dark..."

From the looks of that bikini bottom, there ain't much carpet at ALL going on...
 

He is a douche, but I don't hate hime that badly. He's no Fish Slap by any means.

What is he drinking? Scrote-light,
The beer of choice for douches of any level? Oy vey...

Buffy the Scrotebag Slayer
 

I appreciate a good Fletch reference to start my day. It was subtle and effective.
 

"You usin' your whole fist, douche?"
 

"No, that's 'Douche Bag'."
"Two B's?"
"Just one."
 

Mr. Babar would be proud to take this douche out. I would make her sing Moon River whilest I pummel him with the tennis racket belonging to John Cocktoastin.
 

Good Lord she is amazing.. Too bad she is tainted by this bleached mess..
He's so cool he's drinking fucking ketchup.
 

She makes me wonder, "What kind of a name is poon?"

Comanche indian.
 

Hey, anonymous, you took my line, indeed, a bottle of ketchup.

Wouldn't we both like to dump it on his head, and maybe in another place. Or two.
 

I beleeth she is far gone


...wouldn't stop me from being her Shari if she was my Lambchop!
 

A pair of black and green knickers, two leopardskin knockers, and a couple of neckers.

Sweet nectarine of golden honey-comb-be-my-baby Hott...

Is that a come-hither tatt on your hernia-spott?
 

bring me a cup of hot fat, and the head of Alfredo Garcia.
 

Oh my god! That guy's not a douche! It's this guy!!!

This guy
 

"Buffalo girls, gonna come out tonight,
Come out tonight, come out tonight..."
 

is her name katie?
 

My avatar makes the world a better place.
 

I like them trunks he's sporting.

There. I said it.

Carpet? No, I believe she has a heart of pine hardwood floor in her foyer. And I got her buffer riiight here, all sticky with Pine-Sol.

No, literally. I have a Braun electric floor buffer she's welcome to borrow. For her foyer.

And by 'foyer' I mean bacon louge. And by 'buffer' I mean two round ball-shaped winter olympians ready to pilot their turgid meat sled to a champagne-spewing victory at the base of her louge, by which I mean a map of the Florida Keys across her dolphin tatt.

Uhhh, I lost my trail of breadcrumbs through the Black Forest of Metaphor. Which is a metaphor for metaphor. And by 'metaphor' I mean sideboob.
 

My car just hit a water buffalo, can I borrow her swim suit?
 

I'd almost give him a pass, and her an unwanted pregnancy, if not for the fact that I forget what I'm trying to say here.
 

The sooner this douchebag is shot in the face the better.

Hottie.
 

Excellent reverse bagcessorization on the part of the hott: her body language says it all-- "Great White Douchealo? What Great White Douchalo."

Although, not sure why such a hottie with such beautiful blond hair would want to dye her roots black.

--VS
 

Hey whoop-di-douche, that was me that stole your line haha.

But I totally agree with you, the day will come when we find him and eliminate him from this planet. Thus, making the world tolerable once again..
i don't know what the hell i'm talking about..
god she's hot.

-LS
 

Doctors, I'm calling it. The Hott is P-to-P. Time of douche: 11:35pm EST.

We did all we could.
 

He is obviously a high level douche, note:
ab flex, finger point, plastic coated beer bottle, and spiky hair.

Maybe not the uber-douche he could be, but I think the bleethness of the hott increases my ire enough to bump him up the douche hierarchy.

I would def give her a double dom double steak combo whilst eating caviar off of her pure white cleavite.