Why the long face?
 

This comment has been removed by the author.
 

nothing says 'Class' quite like a sink full of dirty dishes at a house party.
 

Well, I'd be miffed too if somebody peed on my new white Air Jordan hat. I wouldn't still put it on, but I'd be mighty miffed.
 

Chia has killed Sir Mystereo (earlier this month) and skinned his glistening pelt for this hott.
 

So I guess the Teri Hatcher hott (July 22nd 2008) fukks her mann (sic) on the same nights as the the hotts who are clearly NOT her.

Paid announcement much?
 

I just feel sorry for this one. Chin up, Chia!
 

Do you have any napkins? No, i'll just use my sleeve.
 

Just got off his late night shift at McDonalds. Time to party!
 

nice sweatshirt douchebag
 

College bag check list: URC - check, Unwashed dishes - check,unwashed hoodie - check, remedial English class - check, keeping it gangster while mom pays the rent - check, Only food in the house is oatmeal - check (you know there is top ramen in the pantry).
Here is what makes him more than just a regular college kid (you know you were just as dirty is college)
Three earrings in one ear! Sticker on the heavily used air jordan hat!
This guy is college gangstar stoner douche!
 

yeah- he is a rather poor excuse for a douchebag. I mean really, Chia, if you're gonna go in for the bag headbutt, at least you could try and repulse the Hott.

generiscrote is hilarious and spot on. he is a JV douche, just like he was a jv staten island "baller"
 

Shiny busomed girl
must come hither and give heed
to my growing scroll
 

her boy is my nut
complexion mixed and hairy
what a scrote licker
 

oops wrong column
 

Bonus points: ASSliction® hoodie.
 

Nice hat, Chia.

Get lots of practice covering the receding hairline, you're going to need it.

In case you don't know what 'receding' means, you can go ask your mother after she gets off work at the 59th Street Sex Palace.

That donkey show she does really draws 'em in...
 

that apartment sort of reminds me of the one in Pulp Fiction, inhabited by the college scrotes. all we need now is Jules Winnfield and Vincent Vega to walk through the door! "Check out the big brain on Brett! You're a smart motherfucker. That's right. The metric system."
 

John C. Quaker scowls down from his bran-fortified tower of Morality upon this debased spectacle.

Well, guys, I'm off to get a 5" needle shoved between my C6 and C7 vertabrae; if you don't hear from me on Monday it's because I'm learning to type through one of those blow-tube things.

In case I don't make it, I was saving the following for Droopy in the monthly:

Q: What does Droopy call a beach towel soaked in gravy?

A: The Patch.
 

HEY NOW DONT B HATTIN CUZH EZ ON HER NOW 3TIMES WITH A GURL U LOOSERS HES ON HERE NOW 3 TIMES WITH AH OT GIRL UR NOT UR UGLY AN FAT AND DUM SI REPERSNET !!!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
 

DB1,

It appears that bag-maturation in post-industrial societies inverts the natural paradigm. Due primarily to socio-economic factors (lack of money and fake ID's), adolescent bags like Tai Chia here - one of your best monikers btw - are domesticated when young: as evidenced by the frequent scrotophoto's of them preening and posing in their mom's hallways or big sisters' low rent apartment kitchens - think of Trainwreck, the Porches, and HJBBAD to name just a few.

The aspiring douchewank is not hatched into the wild until he has acheived full 'baghood'. And once there, there's no going back*: could you imagine Gator, Donkey Douche or Bra! being tagged at a lame house party? No way. Once they've slithered from their holes in the ground, these choadults are found only in clubs or poolside - where only the most wiley and intrepid baghunter dares to tread.

Could the douchebag be a product of its a-natural gestation? Or is it more likely that the inherently douchey are drawn to formica in their formative years? Maybe you cover this in the book – I haven’t gotten that far yet.

*May not apply with respect to Guido douchebags who continue to appear in tawdry apartment party photos well into their thirties.

Axe Weber
 

All the best to you, sock. And by best I of course mean boobies.
 

@darksock

knew you were into some kinky sex stuff, but that really takes the cake..



good luck amigo....
 

It’s Friday and I’m feeling festive, and slightly buzzed, so another limerick I shall compose:

I spy a magnificent young brunette hott,
Dammit! My load’s been blown into my tea pot
But never should she fear
If she brings me my beer
I’ll slurp for hours at her intimate spot.
 

Hey, he likes it! Mikey! You fucking douche!
 

Shit, I'm not feeling so festive if I have to miss The Dark One's musings for a few days.

Oh well, there's always the rest of my Knob Creek bottle to drown the sorrow.
 

This guy is douchey to the point of absurdity.

Straight to the HOS, say I.
 

This has to be one of my favorite hotts ever from the site. Not only is she brunette girl-next-door type, you know she's prime GF material. One of the few girls ever posted that you would want to date instead of just lust after for a night. Although her judgment in the male department does leave something to be desired....

And GL darksock, hope everythig goes well man.

gradbag
 

Good Luck Darksock.

Keep an eye out for unattended to narcotics. Nothing wrong with nicking a party favor or five while no one is looking right?

- Douchey Smurf
 

A clear case of Marfan Syndrome.

Might want to keep an eye on that stretch.

- Douchey Smurf
 

what a bleak looking kitchen. kinda like this guy's personality.

darksock, i hope your spinal tap goes well. and by well i mean i hope they give you lots of narcotics to take home.
 

good luck today 'Sock. we'll miss you around here for a few days. i'll be thinking of you. naked. in a vat of Nutella. or....not.

nevertheless, a VERY quick recovery out to you good sir.
 

Hopefully C6 and C7 won't sink your battleship.

Get well soon, darksock.
 

Gawd,I hate this douche.I want to slap that look off of his face.He is trying to look hard with a straight face,but it looks like he is fighting a goofy "I scored some hot tail" smirk.He is the Mona Lisa of douche.
 

I guess horse-faced people do like their oats.

Take off that silly ass hat.
 

Mikey,

You're more popular than a rusty syringe at a Tenderloin methadone clinic.

Mackin' the hotts, crashin' the spots
porcupine doo, thrownin' g's to your crew
should'a stayed in school, 'course Mikey's no fool
when will you learn, there are "TWO" O's in goose?

Word, am I fresh?

Peace.
 

darksock - good luck. My only word of advice, speaking from experience is when you are awake enough after this experience, the first words from your mouth should be:




DEMEROL - DAMN IT!!!!
 

Best of luck to you Darksock. I hope you make a speedy recovery.

Chia-douche's girl is certainly hot, but she doesn't look in to him at all. Hence why she's looking away.

That's also the worst hat I've ever seen. I wonder if there's a resemblance between his pubes and the hair on his head.
 

whatever's in the omnipresent red cup appears to have spilled onto doucheface's affliction hoody.

for shame, mr chia, for shame.
 

@darksock...

may you be spongebathed by the hottest of hott nurses.


with a happy ending!


good luck man! speedy recovery!
 

Just remember, Darksock, Chia's hat doubles as a bedpan. All the cool kids are pissing on each other these days.

Yep.
 

This must be the half of the club you own. What's the name of it, "Busted"?

Looks like the URC (ubiquitous red cup) afterparty for the TJ Maxx fashion show is in full-swing. You are the "blue-light special in aisle 5."

Nice work D-nozzle!
 

Like zoinks! I think the cable guy just gave us all the finger.
 

@darksock -

I don't envy you for your procedure, bub. Be good to the nurses and recover quickly!

And does that "blow-tube thing" comment mean you're taking guitar lessons from Peter Frampton? Just curious.
 

Definitely a weekly contender.

HOS? Maybe. I have to agree with Sinfonian, in that he's got a great shot.
 

this chick isnt that hot.looks like flimsy lohan. is she showin the muff to everyone
 

ladies and gentleman thank you for taking the time to put all my girls i get with on this computer up i appreciate it that your all posting stuff about me WOW 3 TIMES NOW THIS THING WITH HOT GIRLS hmmmmm doesnt that tel u sum i guess im a hot douche who gets hot girls
 

Duck...Duck...Douche! You're it!
 

What's up brazhilla? Glad you made it.

WELCOME TO CLUB BUSTED! We just opened, but man...we got all kinds of crazy meth'd-out psycho bogine up in this piece.

Grab yourself a URC -on me! Yeah, that's how I roll brohiem. Pretty sweet, huh? Fuck yeah, it is!

Brah, you meet Keighleigh yet? $20 for her to slob your knob like corn on the cob. Daddy needs some new CZ, so c'mon and book some love.
 

hes sexy!
 

He's not just sexy - he's douchetastic!
 

Chia, you look like Lurches shit!
 

Chia = My First Douchebag by Fisher-Price.

Darksock: Be sure to ask for the Jerry Lewis-strength Percoset.
 

Aw, shit, guys; it was just an epidural injection into my spine for neck and back pain; I popped a couple of Lortab, slept it off last night and went out fishing all day today in the Gulf. We caught 20 reds, 4 shark, 1 king mackerel and a bunch a spanish macks.

Is my neck sore? Yes. Did I fish? FUCK YES.

I'm about to have another Lortab and fire that grill up.

But thanks for the thoughts. Sounds like Plinky had it worse. Mom musta sat on him.
 

my name is not stacey, and i'm not from staten island.

the pic is from facebook.

"the Teri Hatcher hott (July 22nd 2008) fukks her mann" i did not bang him and i dont look like teri hatcher!!!

Anonymous at 10:11am: that is one of the sweetest things a guy has ever said... XOXO
 

I got the feeling that I could easily push that guy away with 2 lame jokes with sous-entendus... He should definitaly give back his double-sized cap to charity...
 

Quaker Scroats.