Thursday, May 22, 2008
Zippy
At first, Zippy's deceptively undouchey. Just your average Bennington student after a long round of herb enhanced Ultimate Frisbee.
Then you notice them. The unmistakable signs of douche. Hidden star tatts that summon the ethos of Fish Slap and Bra. Goofy ass hair bandana. Stupid wristband + watch combo.
Total douche? Not at all. But definitely stage 2.
I would slay Corsicans at the Battle of Ponte Novu while beat boxing in Gaelic just for the chance to tongue scrub Princess Hott's linens after a sweaty and sleepless night. Hotts like that start wars.
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Ah Hells Yeah! Back up and running. That's one hot HOTT. And that's one smirky looking bra... bro. But you know what? He's prolly an alright joker. Bet he can play beer pong like nobodies biz. Pong on "White Wrist" pong strong.
- El Doucho Le Smurfizzle
- El Doucho Le Smurfizzle
# posted by 
: 5:44 PM
: 5:44 PM
Yeah, this one's all about the Hott. On the off chance that some of her underwear may have been in them, I would collect all the dryer lint from the laundry nearest to her house and pack it into my poopchute.
# posted by : 5:55 PM
: 5:55 PM
@Anon 5:58 and 59.... Don't let the old screen door tap you on your ass on the way out. You just have ta get into it broski.
- Douchey Smurf
- Douchey Smurf
# posted by : 6:04 PM
: 6:04 PM
You know, I can't hate too much on our friend here, although men should never EVER wear a headband that pulls back his hair. Plus, it's a good thing he has that sweatband on his wrist, he looks like he's really exerting himself puffing out his chest.
Now, I'd like to say some words about this girlie here, nay, this woman... Damn, she is damn near perfect despite her tragic case of Diminished Gluteal Syndrome. If I was going to nail down my perfect girl, I think I'd start with her and build from there. Truly we are in the presence of true beauty, dare I say the most truly beautiful girl who has appeared on this site.
Now, I'd like to say some words about this girlie here, nay, this woman... Damn, she is damn near perfect despite her tragic case of Diminished Gluteal Syndrome. If I was going to nail down my perfect girl, I think I'd start with her and build from there. Truly we are in the presence of true beauty, dare I say the most truly beautiful girl who has appeared on this site.
there is onlt 2 types of tattoos. type 1: an attempt to make yourself look harder than u actually are.
type 2: a symbol that means something to the wearer.
so wat the fuck is the deal with this star tattoo phenom?? only a douche can answer that. or maybe he cant, maybe hes such a douche he doesnt even know why the fuck he got stars tattooed on his shoulder...
on a lighter note, wat a Hott!
type 2: a symbol that means something to the wearer.
so wat the fuck is the deal with this star tattoo phenom?? only a douche can answer that. or maybe he cant, maybe hes such a douche he doesnt even know why the fuck he got stars tattooed on his shoulder...
on a lighter note, wat a Hott!
# posted by : 6:20 PM
: 6:20 PM
i would skin a live rabid badger for a chance to nibble on her lovely hip bone, that curvy area just peeking out from the top of her shorts.
my goddness, she is lovely.
my goddness, she is lovely.
With that goofy cauliflower rubber band in his hair, he looks like Tempest Bledsoe, ca. 1988. Somebody shoot him in the face.
# posted by : 7:03 PM
: 7:03 PM
Gaelic beat boxing...brillian, DB1, simply brilliant. You never run out. On another note, sex-kitten-next-door is amazing. I would change her litter box any time. And by that I mean I would beg her not to call the police after she catches me going through her underwear drawer.
I was going to take a night off...
Nevermind. She changed my mind. Off to get a sock...
Nevermind. She changed my mind. Off to get a sock...
# posted by : 7:10 PM
: 7:10 PM
@Anon, 6:47 p.m. - Using such an extreme to support your argument isn't a good idea. Now, no one would begrudge you a desire to, for instance, be swallowed by a blue whale to find the bikini bottoms this hott abandoned while deciding to skinny dip.
But you never, *ever* want to be a douchebag. That's just going too far.
But you never, *ever* want to be a douchebag. That's just going too far.
Looks like a creolechoad creepin up on a young lovely hott....
Creolechoad....part black....part white.....black guy hair....pulled back.....with a scrunchie....stylin and profilin in yo big ass stunna shades....so nobody sees your lazy eye....
Creolechoad....part black....part white.....black guy hair....pulled back.....with a scrunchie....stylin and profilin in yo big ass stunna shades....so nobody sees your lazy eye....
# posted by : 8:48 PM
: 8:48 PM
I'd gladly start a war with the Spartans in order to steal Helen of Troy hott, even if it made me look queer like Orlando Bloom.
# posted by : 8:55 PM
: 8:55 PM
"Certified Douchebag"
written by Karl Rove
this for all you choads!
Oooohhhh baby...she walks down the street just feelin the beat/
suddenly he creeps upon her/
she looks around and sees this clown/
scrunchie in his hair hold down a cup of Gin & Perrier/
Ohhhh girl you better watch out/
Before he whips out his.....camera/
Because He's a Certifed Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
Girl you messin with a Certified Douchebag/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
His name is Chase and he grabs your waist/
He reeks of Axe body spray/
You want him to go away but he has this strange charm/
Baby don't become a bleeth!
His breath so stank it melts his teeth!/
Because he's a Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certifed Douchebag!/
"Douchebag"
Baby jus run away before its too late!
Because he's a Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
written by Karl Rove
this for all you choads!
Oooohhhh baby...she walks down the street just feelin the beat/
suddenly he creeps upon her/
she looks around and sees this clown/
scrunchie in his hair hold down a cup of Gin & Perrier/
Ohhhh girl you better watch out/
Before he whips out his.....camera/
Because He's a Certifed Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
Girl you messin with a Certified Douchebag/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
His name is Chase and he grabs your waist/
He reeks of Axe body spray/
You want him to go away but he has this strange charm/
Baby don't become a bleeth!
His breath so stank it melts his teeth!/
Because he's a Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certifed Douchebag!/
"Douchebag"
Baby jus run away before its too late!
Because he's a Certified Douchebag!/
"Douchebag!"
A Certified Douchebag!/
# posted by : 9:00 PM
: 9:00 PM
I would gladly be flogged with a jagged stone, stretched until my skin was nearly ripped apart, and then hung out to tan in the arid heat just for a small piece of me to be woven into the front of her leather belt.
He is a mini bra... smaller stars, coke cup in hand... puffed chest... and total choad.
He is a mini bra... smaller stars, coke cup in hand... puffed chest... and total choad.
# posted by : 9:19 PM
: 9:19 PM
It is true, vermont is a hell that collects stoners like this. Maybe not a douche but most def smells of pot, sweat, and looks very unclean and makes others feel that way when they see him.
Why were the massive "I had 50 cents left over and was at walmart" gay-ban glasses not addressed in the discription?
Why were the massive "I had 50 cents left over and was at walmart" gay-ban glasses not addressed in the discription?
# posted by : 9:35 PM
: 9:35 PM
"just for a small piece of me to be woven into the front of her leather belt."
And by small piece of me... I mean my trouser trout.
And by small piece of me... I mean my trouser trout.
# posted by : 9:52 PM
: 9:52 PM
dude looks like a hater I flipped at Bennigan's last night. wait, make that a waiter I tipped at Bennigan's last night.
# posted by : 11:13 PM
: 11:13 PM
Holy christ is that one screamin Hott. Hottentott hott oughta shot dis dickslot....
# posted by : 11:53 PM
: 11:53 PM
The excessive manscaping screams douche..guys that wax their arms and shave their pits might as well go ahead and get a brazilian for the mangina.
# posted by : 3:41 AM
: 3:41 AM
I am with Ano 9:35: This fagtastic glasses really push this dude over the edge and by edge I mean pulling his face over some razor edges.
# posted by : 5:17 AM
: 5:17 AM
@douche quixote
Maybe she's confused--maybe somebody told her, "Girl, you got to get yourself an ass," and so she picked up this guy. Tragic.
Maybe she's confused--maybe somebody told her, "Girl, you got to get yourself an ass," and so she picked up this guy. Tragic.
for some reason this chick reminds me of kelly lynch in drugstore cowboy.
which is good. and by good, i mean wood.
which is good. and by good, i mean wood.
a cross-breeding of Claudio from Coheed and Cambria and "Spanish" from Old School.
Doucheface Killah
Doucheface Killah
# posted by : 6:51 AM
: 6:51 AM
Zippy is a true douche's douchebag.
At first he appears to be a harmless bozo, but then the longer you stare at his puffed out waxed chest, mini red cup, the shitty star tatts, the slightly arrogant smirk, the georgeous hott, the undeserved sense of entitlement, the more an otherwise sane individual becomes filled with a homicidal or douchecidal rage (thanks scrotten), convinced that any jury would clear one of any wrong-doing if you were to slather this choad in rancid pork brine and feed him to the crocodiles in front of his maternal grandmother.
ahhh, princess...
At first he appears to be a harmless bozo, but then the longer you stare at his puffed out waxed chest, mini red cup, the shitty star tatts, the slightly arrogant smirk, the georgeous hott, the undeserved sense of entitlement, the more an otherwise sane individual becomes filled with a homicidal or douchecidal rage (thanks scrotten), convinced that any jury would clear one of any wrong-doing if you were to slather this choad in rancid pork brine and feed him to the crocodiles in front of his maternal grandmother.
ahhh, princess...
Nice chest stubble, choad.
I'm selling real estate in that little space between the top of her shorts and her delicious, firm, silky, springy, lower abdomen. Inch-square lots start a $1 million.
I'm selling real estate in that little space between the top of her shorts and her delicious, firm, silky, springy, lower abdomen. Inch-square lots start a $1 million.
# posted by : 7:01 AM
: 7:01 AM
I would chug rancid hair-tainted goat milk out of a sick pig's asshole just for the privilege to suck her plumber's unwashed fingers; for those filth-crusted sausages are relics that have touched the porcelain throne that has held aloft the highest wonder. And poop.
But I would never go as far as Anon 6:47. That's just sick.
But I would never go as far as Anon 6:47. That's just sick.
How do idiots this get babes? It's mind boggling.
I hope that bridge from "War of the Worlds" in background gets shot down by aliens and falls on him.
I hope that bridge from "War of the Worlds" in background gets shot down by aliens and falls on him.
# posted by : 7:24 AM
: 7:24 AM
This may have been mentioned above (too lazy to read 40+ comments. The part that disturbs me the most is that this douchenozzle has less body hair than she does.
# posted by : 8:46 AM
: 8:46 AM
I love the gap where her hooch is. It has just enough space to put my hand down there and check the oil.
As for the douche - Paris Hilton called. She wants her sunglasses back.
As for the douche - Paris Hilton called. She wants her sunglasses back.
# posted by : 10:28 AM
: 10:28 AM
I hope the bartender spit in his drink. This Slacker Douche didn't even have the common sense to get a Ubiquitous Red Cup! Effin' DUMBass.
# posted by : 11:11 AM
: 11:11 AM
@Jizztastic
That gap is the best indication of a good bouncing girl, that has no belly and weighs no more than 95lbs
To the GAP!!!! GULP!!!
Nammer
That gap is the best indication of a good bouncing girl, that has no belly and weighs no more than 95lbs
To the GAP!!!! GULP!!!
Nammer
# posted by : 1:24 PM
: 1:24 PM
his mom is going to ground him when she finds out her son stole her sunglasses and used her venus razor on his chest.
# posted by : 2:01 PM
: 2:01 PM
The girl is truly gorgeous and this tool has no shot with her. Guaranteed. Girls like this require a bare minimum of a BMW 5 Series, Aryan good looks and and a bottomless checking account courtesy of mommy and daddy. Geo metro, Joakim Noah wannabe and a few hundred bucks from selling tainted E to junior high kids just won't cut it for this caliber of female.
# posted by : 12:21 AM
: 12:21 AM
I had to run it through picture manager and brighten up the background to be sure, and yes, sure enough, Tempest Butthole has a really douchey looking Afro above his elastic headband.
I went to Bennington.
Bennington has douchebags too.
More than you'd think.
Way more.
Bennington has douchebags too.
More than you'd think.
Way more.
# posted by : 4:51 PM
: 4:51 PM
The hott is super-ouch-I-just-burned-my-fingers hott.
The douche is very douchey - he has all the parts, but I get the impression he's play-acting. Do the math:
red cup. Check.
wrist band. check.
wasxed chest. check.
waxed armpits. check.
smirky fucked up smile. check.
dorky cloth on his head. check.
welding goggles. check.
dopey earring. check.
worthless star tats. check.
BUT: he just doesn't read "douche". As much as I want to bitch slap this little freak (and he IS little, or the hott is seriously tall) I just get the impression that he's just some insecure jewish kid (check the jewfro) from Millburn, New Jersey, who thinks if he has all the signifiers of doucheness, he will attract hotts. And obviously, he did. So, it worked. But I get the impression that after graduation, he'll go to med school and specialise as a podiatrist. He'll never marry the shiksa here. So, he'll bang her skinny little butt for a while and then settle down with Rachel from Metuchen.
The douche is very douchey - he has all the parts, but I get the impression he's play-acting. Do the math:
red cup. Check.
wrist band. check.
wasxed chest. check.
waxed armpits. check.
smirky fucked up smile. check.
dorky cloth on his head. check.
welding goggles. check.
dopey earring. check.
worthless star tats. check.
BUT: he just doesn't read "douche". As much as I want to bitch slap this little freak (and he IS little, or the hott is seriously tall) I just get the impression that he's just some insecure jewish kid (check the jewfro) from Millburn, New Jersey, who thinks if he has all the signifiers of doucheness, he will attract hotts. And obviously, he did. So, it worked. But I get the impression that after graduation, he'll go to med school and specialise as a podiatrist. He'll never marry the shiksa here. So, he'll bang her skinny little butt for a while and then settle down with Rachel from Metuchen.
# posted by : 6:04 PM
: 6:04 PM
I'd say, nottadouche, could be way off the mark but he looks as though those star tats could form a southern cross, slightly more meaningful to the australasian viewer but still a douchey tat, the headband and so forth is a typical trait among the islander community here, really not a show pony/douchey thing.
watch/sweatband combo.... unexcusable... and the pose for the camera.... really wouldnt say much of a douche
watch/sweatband combo.... unexcusable... and the pose for the camera.... really wouldnt say much of a douche
# posted by : 7:50 AM
: 7:50 AM
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: 4:56 PM
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ED Hardy
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Christian Audigier
CA Men Hoodies
CA Men Jeans
CA Men Long Sleeve
CA Men Shirts
CA Men Shorts
CA Men Sports Wear
CA Men Tee
CA Swimsuit
CA Women Hoodies
CA Women Jeans
CA Women Long Sleeve
CA Women Tee
ED Hardy
ED Hardy Belt
ED Hardy Belts
ED Hardy Caps
ED Hardy Handbags
ED Hardy Kids
It is easy to get warhammer gold when warhammer online gold is available. With a little money you can buy warhammer gold more and cheaper. Sometimes buy warhammer online gold will make the game more interesting than grinding warhammer money.
# posted by : 11:01 PM
: 11:01 PM
The history of Ed Hardy, Christian Audigier, Ugg, Nike Air Jordan and GHD
Attention Ladies and Gentlemen:
If you are a street fashion people, you must know Ed Hardy Christian Audigier. They are a world famous clothing brand that famous for the special tattoo art design. Now I will tell you something about the unique clothing brand.
Products: The brand became very famous because it was worn by many famous celebrities like Madonna, Britney spears and also Sylvester Stallone. The brand has clothes for men, women, and kids. They have also diversified their business by having a lot of accessories to support their clothing business. They have a variety of products such as Ed Hardy men and women t-shirts, active wear, hoody, denim, outwear, swim trucks, sweaters, tops etc. The some special accessories for women include things such as belts, caps, scarves, shoes, socks, jeweler, sunglasses, ties , wallets and others.
Hair is very important for everyone. Everyone is very attentive to their own hair. if you have GHD Hair Straighteners, you can make you hair strighteners easily! GHDS are the famous brand in the world wide , Our GHD Hair Products can meet your different needs.
Pls allow me to introduce the history of the UGG .UGG was been made in Australia for over 200 years. They might fit their name, they are UGLY, but they are realy very comfortable and they wear really well. if you have one Uggs classic tall boots or one ugg bailey button boots or ugg nightfall boots or ugg 30th anniversary boots ,you will find the the boots are actually comfortable as your favorite pair of bedroom slippers and you can actually wear them outdoors and anywhere you want to.
Pls don’t wast your time, friend! You have came to the right website of the latest and coolest famous shoes and apparels of today's fashion. The Nike Air jordan we offer are high quality with low price. Don’t lose the chance to give yourself Michael Jordan Shoes revel. The Air Jordan online store provide many fashion Air Jordan Sneakers that will go well with any of your clothes. The Nike Air Jordan have comfortable wearing and suitable for multi-sports.
Read more: http://www.loginfashion.com
http://www.uggonsale.org
http://www.jordanshoesdiy.org
http://www.ghdforsale.org
Attention Ladies and Gentlemen:
If you are a street fashion people, you must know Ed Hardy Christian Audigier. They are a world famous clothing brand that famous for the special tattoo art design. Now I will tell you something about the unique clothing brand.
Products: The brand became very famous because it was worn by many famous celebrities like Madonna, Britney spears and also Sylvester Stallone. The brand has clothes for men, women, and kids. They have also diversified their business by having a lot of accessories to support their clothing business. They have a variety of products such as Ed Hardy men and women t-shirts, active wear, hoody, denim, outwear, swim trucks, sweaters, tops etc. The some special accessories for women include things such as belts, caps, scarves, shoes, socks, jeweler, sunglasses, ties , wallets and others.
Hair is very important for everyone. Everyone is very attentive to their own hair. if you have GHD Hair Straighteners, you can make you hair strighteners easily! GHDS are the famous brand in the world wide , Our GHD Hair Products can meet your different needs.
Pls allow me to introduce the history of the UGG .UGG was been made in Australia for over 200 years. They might fit their name, they are UGLY, but they are realy very comfortable and they wear really well. if you have one Uggs classic tall boots or one ugg bailey button boots or ugg nightfall boots or ugg 30th anniversary boots ,you will find the the boots are actually comfortable as your favorite pair of bedroom slippers and you can actually wear them outdoors and anywhere you want to.
Pls don’t wast your time, friend! You have came to the right website of the latest and coolest famous shoes and apparels of today's fashion. The Nike Air jordan we offer are high quality with low price. Don’t lose the chance to give yourself Michael Jordan Shoes revel. The Air Jordan online store provide many fashion Air Jordan Sneakers that will go well with any of your clothes. The Nike Air Jordan have comfortable wearing and suitable for multi-sports.
Read more: http://www.loginfashion.com
http://www.uggonsale.org
http://www.jordanshoesdiy.org
http://www.ghdforsale.org
Atlantica online Gold is useful in the game. If you want to get a high level in short time, you should have a large number of Atlantica Gold. It is necessary for you to spend some cheap Atlantica online Gold on equipments. You can buy Atlantica online Gold on website directly. Of course, you can earn Atlantica online money in the game, but it is slow and difficult.Atlantica online Gold is useful in the game. If you want to get a high level in short time, you should have a large number of Atlantica Gold. It is necessary for you to spend some cheap Atlantica online Gold on equipments. You can buy Atlantica online Gold on website directly. Of course, you can earn Atlantica online money in the game, but it is slow and difficult.
# posted by : 12:02 AM
: 12:02 AM
Do you know 2Moons dil? if you play the online game, you will know that 2moons
gold is the game gold, in the game if you had more 2moon dil, you will had a tall level, but if you want to buy 2Moons dil, you can come here and only spend a little money then can bought the cheap 2Moons dil. Quickly come here.
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gold is the game gold, in the game if you had more 2moon dil, you will had a tall level, but if you want to buy 2Moons dil, you can come here and only spend a little money then can bought the cheap 2Moons dil. Quickly come here.
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