Thursday, March 20, 2008
HCwDB Turns No. 2
Happy Birthday! The site turns two today.
At the risk of sounding like an emo Mayerbag, it's been a pleasure and a body wonderland to keep you laughing. And also to see how far we've grown since it was my far off grumblings in a corner of the intarwebs.
We get to do a service on behalf of the hopes and dreams of a less greasy tomorrow, while staring at boobies the whole time.
We're part ideological crusaders, part pervs.
There's lots of good stuff coming up in year three, including the book release in July. So to the 'bag hunters who send me pics on a daily basis, couldn't have done it without you. To the regulars in the comments threads, bringing the funny every day is an amazing thing to behold.
We will untilt those cracked up designer Yankee caps one at a time if we have to. We will liberate the hott by teaching the hott that what she thinks is attractive is a Madison Ave marketing strategy.
And like Winston Churchill, Lewis and Clark, and Bill Murray's unit in Stripes, we will prevail.
That's the facts, Jack.
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Happy 2nd Birthday DB1.
your brainchild has given us endless amounts of entertainment and laughs, and you've made the world a better place.
i'll be toasting to your success in Vegas baby.
your brainchild has given us endless amounts of entertainment and laughs, and you've made the world a better place.
i'll be toasting to your success in Vegas baby.
# posted by 
: 7:11 AM
: 7:11 AM
Happy Second B-Day, DB1!
and thank you for this wonderland of boobies and banter. your hard work (and by hard work i mean drinking night train and eatin ho-hos) has given us (regulars and newbs alike) a place to have fun and rant.
and see boobies.
cheers, to many more!
and thank you for this wonderland of boobies and banter. your hard work (and by hard work i mean drinking night train and eatin ho-hos) has given us (regulars and newbs alike) a place to have fun and rant.
and see boobies.
cheers, to many more!
raise a glass to our man, db1,
for this site, where we all can have fun,
look at boobs, cast some votes,
all the while dissing scrotes,
so we say to db, "thanks a ton!"
for this site, where we all can have fun,
look at boobs, cast some votes,
all the while dissing scrotes,
so we say to db, "thanks a ton!"
Happy birthday, site!
On a side note, has anybody noticed the "Customers also bought" selections on Amazon? They're all on serial killers. Is one of the regs studying up for a douchicide?
On a side note, has anybody noticed the "Customers also bought" selections on Amazon? They're all on serial killers. Is one of the regs studying up for a douchicide?
It's greasy Will Ferrell in a promo shot for the new douche spoof "A Night at The Roxbury; The Scrode Chronicals"
Sniff...sniff happy moments make me...cry...(sniff)... congrats DB1 you...give...my life...(sniff)...(sniff)...meaning.
I love BOOBIES!!!
I love BOOBIES!!!
# posted by : 7:31 AM
: 7:31 AM
The observant Mr. White once again points out the collateral data provided by Amazon.
The tags are also humorous...
"satire", "scrote"...and simply, "orange" LMMFAO
The tags are also humorous...
"satire", "scrote"...and simply, "orange" LMMFAO
@phah-
Nice avatar, is that the rare "dual retarded spider" formation? Or perhaps two 4 legged women protecting the chastity of the middle "vajeen"
Nice avatar, is that the rare "dual retarded spider" formation? Or perhaps two 4 legged women protecting the chastity of the middle "vajeen"
Congrats DB1! When you were writing at UT, did you ever think you would accomplish this?
And be serious. Do you ever think we will be rid of all that is douche in the world? its like the GWOT. despite our efforts, some asshole is always gonna fuck shit up for everyone else. So we will mock, laugh, and covet boobies. Cheers!
And be serious. Do you ever think we will be rid of all that is douche in the world? its like the GWOT. despite our efforts, some asshole is always gonna fuck shit up for everyone else. So we will mock, laugh, and covet boobies. Cheers!
To our great and wonderous leader, DB1, a hale and hearty shout out to the brah. You make the morning and afternoon palatable at work with your rapacious wit and mocking of all things scrote. Keep up the fight, for if we lose this epic struggle, all hotts will be lost to the Bleeth virus.
Ahh, pfah going back to the classic.
And as a personal note: Fuck Fish Slap. And boobies.
UFOD
Ahh, pfah going back to the classic.
And as a personal note: Fuck Fish Slap. And boobies.
UFOD
# posted by : 7:51 AM
: 7:51 AM
@douche bigalow....thanks dude.
that's actually my gang sign. i'm a member of the feared Wascally Wabbit gang here on the East Coast.
represent!
that's actually my gang sign. i'm a member of the feared Wascally Wabbit gang here on the East Coast.
represent!
# posted by : 7:53 AM
: 7:53 AM
Congrats DB1.
I just turned a 2 this morning, also.
Keeps the douchebags coming.
And, most importantly, the boobies.
I just turned a 2 this morning, also.
Keeps the douchebags coming.
And, most importantly, the boobies.
Happy birthday. I'd love to make it to the release party. Hat tilted, chest greased, and the faux-hawk tinted and ready to rock. Congrats.
2 years and Scott Alexander is still #1 in my heart! ICHIBAN! AH-SO! AH-SO!
Oy vey. When's that Limey choad going to leave this planet?
Oy vey. When's that Limey choad going to leave this planet?
# posted by : 8:13 AM
: 8:13 AM
Unfortunately this pic was shot two inches too low to reveal what might be a truly excellent Mark of the 'Bag. Pity.
Oh, and -- boobies. In this case, rather scary ones.
douche equis
Oh, and -- boobies. In this case, rather scary ones.
douche equis
# posted by : 8:20 AM
: 8:20 AM
DB1 is like that Hallie Bop cult leader and we're all sporting the Nike Cortez and black sweatsuits, but in a good way, not a mass-suicide way.
Happy Birthday douchebag website. And Happy Birthday boobies!! Everyday is happy when boobies are involved.
What does it say when your breasts are bigger than your head, but you're a dude.
# posted by : 8:33 AM
: 8:33 AM
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to (mumble incoherently because you don't know who's name it is but you decided to sing along in the restaurant anyway because you're drunk)
Happy birthday to yoooouuuuu.
DB1, I hope you got everything you wanted and deserved this birthday: boobies.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to (mumble incoherently because you don't know who's name it is but you decided to sing along in the restaurant anyway because you're drunk)
Happy birthday to yoooouuuuu.
DB1, I hope you got everything you wanted and deserved this birthday: boobies.
# posted by : 8:43 AM
: 8:43 AM
DB1! Yo, congrats and good job Man! Keep the dream alive... Keep the dream alive.
With the price of oil going up, the endless supply of grease you provide is a steal.
With the price of oil going up, the endless supply of grease you provide is a steal.
# posted by : 8:59 AM
: 8:59 AM
For's he's a jolly good fellow, who douches will deny.
Happy BDay DB1!
I am eagerly awaiting the cover.
Pic of Ricky or Side Boob?
Happy BDay DB1!
I am eagerly awaiting the cover.
Pic of Ricky or Side Boob?
may some bulemic models with implausible hooters come to your 2nd site birthday party...and may some one have a camera to capture the cake jumping out of the girls
# posted by : 9:12 AM
: 9:12 AM
Happy birthday, HCwDB, and keep up the trailblazing work, DB1.
Somebody's got to do it. Or the Madison Ave. marketing strategies will continue to cash in on their intentional propagation of ignorance on this great country.
I solute you, DB1.
Amerigo Vesdouchey
Somebody's got to do it. Or the Madison Ave. marketing strategies will continue to cash in on their intentional propagation of ignorance on this great country.
I solute you, DB1.
Amerigo Vesdouchey
# posted by : 9:23 AM
: 9:23 AM
geez DB1, I know it's your birthday and all, but did you have to foist another gator pic on us?
I'm gonna commit orangicide.
I'm gonna commit orangicide.
DB1:
Happy Second birthday! In Spanish that's pronounced "douche". True story, check it out on wikipedia and babel fish.
And I have an idea for the book. You need to put side boob on the spine. Cuz it's the side of the book. And it's boobs. I'm not talking about a picture, I'm talking about an actual smurf-size supple breast, gel filled, with erect nipple.
Don't make me staple a stray dog's teat on my copy. I will. And I will thumb that mother raw.
@ Mr. White:
Shut up dude, be cool. Shit, way to out a brother.
Happy Second birthday! In Spanish that's pronounced "douche". True story, check it out on wikipedia and babel fish.
And I have an idea for the book. You need to put side boob on the spine. Cuz it's the side of the book. And it's boobs. I'm not talking about a picture, I'm talking about an actual smurf-size supple breast, gel filled, with erect nipple.
Don't make me staple a stray dog's teat on my copy. I will. And I will thumb that mother raw.
@ Mr. White:
Shut up dude, be cool. Shit, way to out a brother.
the wreck of the ol no 1
tis a tragic day, that we just have to say happy birthday to HCwDB's
o-lay (and by that i mean, oil)
tis a tragic day, that we just have to say happy birthday to HCwDB's
o-lay (and by that i mean, oil)
# posted by : 10:31 AM
: 10:31 AM
happy birthday! and to think, i used to be sent to the principle's office for saying shit like this. thank you for providing me with an outlet.
@darksock
Don't worry, bra. No law enforcement officials are reading this.
NSAGuy138 says: He's correct. We're not reading. Continue to talk openly and frankly.
Don't worry, bra. No law enforcement officials are reading this.
NSAGuy138 says: He's correct. We're not reading. Continue to talk openly and frankly.
Cheers, DB1. I tip my woodchuck granny smith hard cider to many more years of douche-hunting!
# posted by : 12:42 PM
: 12:42 PM
Happy 2nd birthday! Your book is eagerly awaited by myself and many of my co-workers, along with all the regulars here of course.
It is now common practice at my worplace to use the "I think he's a (insert compliment) and by that I mean (insert entirely unrelated insult.)formula. You and your site are influencing pop culture. Excellent work!
It is now common practice at my worplace to use the "I think he's a (insert compliment) and by that I mean (insert entirely unrelated insult.)formula. You and your site are influencing pop culture. Excellent work!
Wow a milestone....... 2 years of constant bags. Are there that many douchebags in the world? DB1 is only scratching the surface.
# posted by : 2:26 PM
: 2:26 PM
happy b-day DB1... & by happy b-day I mean hit these two with a bat corked with TNT!
# posted by : 3:27 PM
: 3:27 PM
A toast to the 260 days of sporting wood in front of coworkers and the next 260 days to come.
Happy Birthday, Boobies, and Fuck Fish Slap,
The Duke
Happy Birthday, Boobies, and Fuck Fish Slap,
The Duke
# posted by : 5:07 PM
: 5:07 PM
DB1, thanks for all of the memories, you have ruined my life. I have lead a shallow douche-free (or at least douche-light) existence. Now that I know of Rehab, and Fish Slap and Joseph Porsche, my life seems meaningless. However, the fact that there are ladies like Kaitlin/Purg and HBT out there, somehow life doesn't seem so bad. So thank you for both ruining and enhancing my life, it's much/not at all appreciated.
serial killin and body waxin...sounds like amazon has summed up the internal conflict of those that follow db like unrequited manson girls followed the grateful dead
# posted by : 11:50 PM
: 11:50 PM
It looks like they are both one inhale away from exploding.
This should be the cover of your book.
kingcitygDouche
This should be the cover of your book.
kingcitygDouche
# posted by : 11:42 AM
: 11:42 AM
Happy Birthday to your monster creation, DB1, and thank you. This pair is among the most oily and repulsive I have ever seen, on this site or anywhere. I'd rather lick heavy crude off of a sick seagull than touch either one of these greasy mutants.
# posted by : 11:27 PM
: 11:27 PM
Has anyone else had the thought that as big of a self-important douche as Gator is, that he could have got a larger tattoo? If you really are number one shouldn't it be a bit bigger than the spring break variety?
With that said I'll plug Deluxe Tattoo in Chicago.
With that said I'll plug Deluxe Tattoo in Chicago.
HOLY SHIT theres a behemoth sized wall of meat and boobs. This Chodinator looks like a Sentinel except instead of detecting/hunting mutants, being able to fly and project energy blasts, he is an incredibly enormous posing fucking douchebag.
# posted by : 10:27 PM
: 10:27 PM
Shit, i thought there was nothing worse than tribal tattoos. That juiced up piece of oompa sinew has the most disgusting shitstain i've ever seen. I could die happy if only allowed the chance to smash this greased fuck's head in with a ballpoint hammer. It's a very sad day when such a naturally gorgeous girl is bleethed out so terribly that the very orange plastic seems to spread to her from the forementioned 'bag like TTU raider rash.
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# posted by : 2:09 AM
: 2:09 AM << Home
