Monday, March 24, 2008
HCwDB of the Week
Your narrator in all things teat-party/Declaration of Scoadependence, The DB1, spent the weekend recovering from a nasty cold/flu, dazed out of his mind on the couch, and half consciously watching bad teen comedy movies on TBS.
But even in my Nyquil inspired daze, I still realized that Rob Schneider's The Hot Chick was like a root canal to the soul.
That being said, my comments may be brief today, so pick up the slack and help me soldier on through. The good news is this is an excellent Weekly. And by excellent, I mean basic cable has too many commercials.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #1: Inflation 'Bag
The only downside of this otherwise perfect blending of hott, inflatadouche and creepy, hilariously awkward embrace, is the vaguely porny feeling we get.
I try to disqualify porn couples from contention, as calling them out for being greasy combos of hott/douche is like calling out the Quakers for being wussies who can't take a beating.
Yeah, you, Quakers.
I'm talking about your mom.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #2: Kid Scrote aka Two Boobs
Baw wit da baw, de bang de bang douchey douchey douchey,
Say that 'baggy, said up jump the 'baggy.
He's like the Travelling Wilberry, if you merged Jeff Beck, Tom Petty, Roy Orbison, Kid Rock, and a gallon of southern douche grease into one person.
Then again, he's kinda sweet. Underneath all that scruff and giant mandana, there's just a kid who wants to rock.
She is down home key lime pie goodness, but in that inflated artificial sweetener, kind of way. Like Key Lime Pie with Olestra.
And boobs.
And a curve on her back that could melt ice and punch kittens in the snout.
Stupid cute kitten snout.
You deserved that punch, stupid cute kitten snout.
I have nothing else to add to this pic.
But since it takes up so much space on the page, I'll keep rambling. Besides, my Dayquil hasn't yet kicked in.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #3: The Saturday Yo aka Yo-Yo 'Bag
PIC DELETED
I don't think I realized the stealth power of this pic when I ran it on Saturday.
But really, getting back to basics, is there anything worse in a hottie/douchey coupling then what's going on right here?
The sweet, innocent cutie with the crooked smile?
Yo MTV Douches, busting the worst hand gesture since Bob Dole let go of his pencil and tried to boogie at the USO dance?
Yup. The DB1 is cracked up on cold medications.
And them's your three. This should be a tough contest. Any one of these three could win. But which one will?
Make your votes known, as always, in the comments thread.
But even in my Nyquil inspired daze, I still realized that Rob Schneider's The Hot Chick was like a root canal to the soul.
That being said, my comments may be brief today, so pick up the slack and help me soldier on through. The good news is this is an excellent Weekly. And by excellent, I mean basic cable has too many commercials.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #1: Inflation 'Bag
The only downside of this otherwise perfect blending of hott, inflatadouche and creepy, hilariously awkward embrace, is the vaguely porny feeling we get.
I try to disqualify porn couples from contention, as calling them out for being greasy combos of hott/douche is like calling out the Quakers for being wussies who can't take a beating.
Yeah, you, Quakers.
I'm talking about your mom.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #2: Kid Scrote aka Two Boobs
Baw wit da baw, de bang de bang douchey douchey douchey,
Say that 'baggy, said up jump the 'baggy.
He's like the Travelling Wilberry, if you merged Jeff Beck, Tom Petty, Roy Orbison, Kid Rock, and a gallon of southern douche grease into one person.
Then again, he's kinda sweet. Underneath all that scruff and giant mandana, there's just a kid who wants to rock.
She is down home key lime pie goodness, but in that inflated artificial sweetener, kind of way. Like Key Lime Pie with Olestra.
And boobs.
And a curve on her back that could melt ice and punch kittens in the snout.
Stupid cute kitten snout.
You deserved that punch, stupid cute kitten snout.
I have nothing else to add to this pic.
But since it takes up so much space on the page, I'll keep rambling. Besides, my Dayquil hasn't yet kicked in.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #3: The Saturday Yo aka Yo-Yo 'Bag
PIC DELETED
I don't think I realized the stealth power of this pic when I ran it on Saturday.
But really, getting back to basics, is there anything worse in a hottie/douchey coupling then what's going on right here?
The sweet, innocent cutie with the crooked smile?
Yo MTV Douches, busting the worst hand gesture since Bob Dole let go of his pencil and tried to boogie at the USO dance?
Yup. The DB1 is cracked up on cold medications.
And them's your three. This should be a tough contest. Any one of these three could win. But which one will?
Make your votes known, as always, in the comments thread.
Comments:
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based on overall sleaze factor, & despite the fact that they look like they actually are fond of each other Kid Scrote & 2 Boobs get my vote. tats, bad hair, kooky shades & the icky feeling that they have been knocking boots for a week without showering once (ick) puts 'em over the top.
Scrote Kid & Tatas ftw
Scrote Kid & Tatas ftw
# posted by 
: 6:52 AM
: 6:52 AM
This is a tough one, but not like the pressure of last month's HCwDBotM. This one is tough because none of these guys jumps out at me and screams, "I WORK AT A CELL PHONE KIOSK/CAR RENTAL STORE AND LEAVE THE STICKERS ON MY HATS!"
Inflation Bag looks like he's on to us and he's slowly calculating his move, before he pounces like a swolen jungle cat who will have a stroke around 45.
Kid Scrote has the mandana, the unfinished sleeve, a studded white belt and a full-on Bleethe. He's pretty Buckcherried, that's for sure.
Yo-Yo Bag has the tilted hat, is doing something hip and edgy with his right hand while going for the coup-de-tit with his left hand as his young Katie Holmes begs for rescue with her innocent eyes and perfect cheek structure.
Edge: Yo-Yo Bag.
Inflation Bag looks like he's on to us and he's slowly calculating his move, before he pounces like a swolen jungle cat who will have a stroke around 45.
Kid Scrote has the mandana, the unfinished sleeve, a studded white belt and a full-on Bleethe. He's pretty Buckcherried, that's for sure.
Yo-Yo Bag has the tilted hat, is doing something hip and edgy with his right hand while going for the coup-de-tit with his left hand as his young Katie Holmes begs for rescue with her innocent eyes and perfect cheek structure.
Edge: Yo-Yo Bag.
# posted by : 6:56 AM
: 6:56 AM
Has to be Yo-Yo Bag based on the Hott. He is uber-douche and she is uber-wholesome, and that means he should die. Or at least win the weekly.
# posted by : 7:00 AM
: 7:00 AM
Yo-Yo Bag FTW.
The retired porn couple get a pass in my book. They're both already falling apart.
And Kid Scrote, I don't buy that picture at all. He looks like he just fell out of the cardboard box under the bridge behind the men's room of a truck stop where he did something to that guy for two bucks, but can't remember what it is. I think he'd offer you a zj and pronounce you can't afford it if you don't know what it is. All while cupping your puppy's balls.
As for the Yo-Yo, check him out, YO. Idiotic hat tilt. He's still wearing a club-admission wristband as some sort of status symbol. Ring on his middle finger. Ill advised shirt and coat pairing. And is desperately trying to demonstrate that he's entitled to a grope.
And she's freakin' cute as hell.
The retired porn couple get a pass in my book. They're both already falling apart.
And Kid Scrote, I don't buy that picture at all. He looks like he just fell out of the cardboard box under the bridge behind the men's room of a truck stop where he did something to that guy for two bucks, but can't remember what it is. I think he'd offer you a zj and pronounce you can't afford it if you don't know what it is. All while cupping your puppy's balls.
As for the Yo-Yo, check him out, YO. Idiotic hat tilt. He's still wearing a club-admission wristband as some sort of status symbol. Ring on his middle finger. Ill advised shirt and coat pairing. And is desperately trying to demonstrate that he's entitled to a grope.
And she's freakin' cute as hell.
# posted by : 7:12 AM
: 7:12 AM
Yo-Yo is the Douchiest. He's the only one that looks like he cares more about the picture than the girl. He also looks drunk or high.
# posted by : 7:16 AM
: 7:16 AM
Yo Yo Bag- the douche hott disparity is the greatest- and he hasn't made the full 'I'm in a band' tatt commitment so he can keep his career as the assistant duplex printer repairman on track.
# posted by : 7:17 AM
: 7:17 AM
yo yo bag is cellyo-in into the monthly...hhe bangs drink specials
gropes is a drunken douche pass contender if his hot wasn't so much my type, hell she is everyone's type but basicallly his unworthyness to even share a frame with her is only magnified by his douchiest of all fake boob grabs
her hotness and the sweetness of her pose (though no doubt illusory)
only serves to magnify his minor league douchocity into big time dimension...
and really isn't that what its really all about, a guy who is barely a scrote becomes worthy of an ipicac martini by proximity to the one hott that drags your tired ass out on turesday night because you know she'll be there
gropes is a drunken douche pass contender if his hot wasn't so much my type, hell she is everyone's type but basicallly his unworthyness to even share a frame with her is only magnified by his douchiest of all fake boob grabs
her hotness and the sweetness of her pose (though no doubt illusory)
only serves to magnify his minor league douchocity into big time dimension...
and really isn't that what its really all about, a guy who is barely a scrote becomes worthy of an ipicac martini by proximity to the one hott that drags your tired ass out on turesday night because you know she'll be there
# posted by : 7:30 AM
: 7:30 AM
The winner has to be the wannabe member of Guns-n-Roses, Kid Scrote. He looks like he hasn't taken a shower in over a year. Please someone throw him in the toxic water of China during the Bejing Oylmpics, in order to clean the world of this uberscrote.
# posted by : 7:34 AM
: 7:34 AM
It's gotta be Yo-Yo Bag.
He represents all things douche.
Yo-Yo Bag FTW.
My soul feels dirty.
He represents all things douche.
Yo-Yo Bag FTW.
My soul feels dirty.
# posted by : 7:36 AM
: 7:36 AM
Kid Scrote aka Two Boobs gets the nod from me this week. Yo-Yo 'Bag came in a VERY close second for me, but the mandana and studded belt pushed Kid Scrote aka Two Boobs into the winner's circle.
also, i do not live in a horse.
also, i do not live in a horse.
# posted by : 7:43 AM
: 7:43 AM
Yo-Yo Bag. He's groping Deathtongue hott's less-absurdly-beautiful but possibly more aware of this world's happening's (and still very hot) younger sister/cousin. She doesn't manage DT's-hott's level of detachment; now, that probably means she enjoys being felt up by Radio Shack employee douche on camera, but we can pretend it means she's going to turn around in just a second or two and clock him in the nuts.
# posted by : 7:43 AM
: 7:43 AM
Yo-Yo Bag.
Notice his attempt to pull off both the shocker and the Calabunga at the same time. This Hybrid douche move should stress his douchousity along with the oversize, backwards cap. Also, let's not forgot Mrs. Rosey Cheek hotty. She looks like a naughty office secretary that would love to file my paperwork.
Notice his attempt to pull off both the shocker and the Calabunga at the same time. This Hybrid douche move should stress his douchousity along with the oversize, backwards cap. Also, let's not forgot Mrs. Rosey Cheek hotty. She looks like a naughty office secretary that would love to file my paperwork.
# posted by : 7:45 AM
: 7:45 AM
yo-yo bag FTW.
inflatobag, on the offhand chance he can track i.p. addresses, looks like a fine, upstanding fellow. and his "wife" is a brilliant conversationalist.
kid rock & his "lady" look like pretty much all california rocker couples. that is to say, skanky. not much that raises the blood pressure for me.
yo-yo, however...
at the clubs, yo-yobag is much like the bumblebee. he's that drunken ass who flits from flower to sweet flower, spewing forth his tired lines, till he finds the one who is drunk enough to buy his shit. then he goes to her crib and passes out on the bathroom floor.
she's far too purty in my book to fall for his crap, though. she's just too sweet to tell him to fuck off. hopefully she popped him in the eye after this photo was taken.
inflatobag, on the offhand chance he can track i.p. addresses, looks like a fine, upstanding fellow. and his "wife" is a brilliant conversationalist.
kid rock & his "lady" look like pretty much all california rocker couples. that is to say, skanky. not much that raises the blood pressure for me.
yo-yo, however...
at the clubs, yo-yobag is much like the bumblebee. he's that drunken ass who flits from flower to sweet flower, spewing forth his tired lines, till he finds the one who is drunk enough to buy his shit. then he goes to her crib and passes out on the bathroom floor.
she's far too purty in my book to fall for his crap, though. she's just too sweet to tell him to fuck off. hopefully she popped him in the eye after this photo was taken.
I'll go along with Yo-yo based on the hott, she's a relatively ignorant young thing and hasn't yet learned what a douche is at the time of this pic...but, while aging actually appears she may have a chance in life.
Kid Scrote, well, the hott has a Paris Hilton style doucheness in her own right, so they belong together...
Inflationbag, well, he's just a stupid musclehead with a dazed out hott who, while having a nice rack, likely uses that to get though life with.
Kid Scrote, well, the hott has a Paris Hilton style doucheness in her own right, so they belong together...
Inflationbag, well, he's just a stupid musclehead with a dazed out hott who, while having a nice rack, likely uses that to get though life with.
gotta go with the yo yo. while douche levels were relatively low this week (compared to other weeks) something about yo yo's hott makes me all warm and cuddly inside. and by cuddly, i mean engorged.
yo yo in a landslide
yo yo in a landslide
yo yo is just a drunken frat bag & his hott, while stunning, is proceeding down the road to bleethedom (probably due to proximity), notice thumb ring, leopard print dress (animal prints always say tramp) & oh-my-god, is that an engagement ring.... say it aint so, poor taste to boot or as Forrest Gump says "stupid is as stupid does!"
meh this couple is just undesirable
meh this couple is just undesirable
# posted by : 8:02 AM
: 8:02 AM
It was tough to decide but Kid Scrote for sure. Stupid bandana, sleeve tats, the desire to look stinky/dirty, and a need for ten sandwiches makes him just gross.
Nothing says true love like a photo in front of grandma Mabel's rusty old staircase by the pool.
You scored peroxide hottie. Scored a douche that is.
Nothing says true love like a photo in front of grandma Mabel's rusty old staircase by the pool.
You scored peroxide hottie. Scored a douche that is.
this is no contest. kid scrote's just trying to get in touch with his inner tommy lee so he can bang blonde, pam anderson hott. the old guy is trying to recapture his youth with a lame, tight fitting tee shirt, giant head and hot girlfriend. but the yo bag....oh, the yo bag. he is all that is wrong with youth today. a sense of entitlement without reason because his mom didn't love him enough so she just gave him toys, money and never said "no".
now look what she's created: a douche tool half-crocked on gray goose while he struggles to find an identity somewhere between Growing up Gotti and the latest 50 Cent album.
poo on him. poo on him forever, for he is the worst of the worst of the worst of the douche.
now look what she's created: a douche tool half-crocked on gray goose while he struggles to find an identity somewhere between Growing up Gotti and the latest 50 Cent album.
poo on him. poo on him forever, for he is the worst of the worst of the worst of the douche.
# posted by : 8:05 AM
: 8:05 AM
My vote is with Inflation Bag, if not for the shirt, then the vacant expression on his face. One day a marble bust of IB will stand watch over the hallowed halls of the International Douche Sanctum. Like the Lincoln Memorial, children will stand in awe ask ponder the life of such a bottom dwelling Bleeth banger.
# posted by : 8:05 AM
: 8:05 AM
Tough call, but it's Yo-Yo Bag in a close call over Kid Scrote. Kid's Hott is probably as skeevy as he is. Inflation Bag will die a well-deserved death from steroid-induced kidney failure.
On the other hand' the shit-eating grin on Yo Yo makes we want to take his teeth out with a well-placed kick to the back of the head while he's munching a curbstone, like that scene in American History X. Run, hottie, run!
On the other hand' the shit-eating grin on Yo Yo makes we want to take his teeth out with a well-placed kick to the back of the head while he's munching a curbstone, like that scene in American History X. Run, hottie, run!
While the Yo-Yo is a garden variety choad, in twenty years he'll be the stable father of 2.5 kids living in the suburbs of Cleveland.
Kid Scrote's LA bag look says any man who thinks more about his hair than his girl does with hers deserves eternal mocker. He's a few steps away from being mistaken for a trannie.
Kid Scrote: Putten "men" in "effeminate".
Kid Scrote's LA bag look says any man who thinks more about his hair than his girl does with hers deserves eternal mocker. He's a few steps away from being mistaken for a trannie.
Kid Scrote: Putten "men" in "effeminate".
# posted by : 8:09 AM
: 8:09 AM
Kid Scrote isn't as douchey as Yo Yo bag, but he looks a lot more clownish. To top it off, his hott looks like she gives it up on the regular where as YoYo's gal probably makes you work for it. I'm taking the easy route. Kid Scrote for the win.
# posted by : 8:12 AM
: 8:12 AM
A fine selection of melons this week, but I have to go with yo-yo.
She seems like girl next door Hott and yo-yo 'bag is getting his grease all over her. This upsets me greatly. Just what I didn't need on a Monday morning. Damn you, yo-yo 'bag. Damn you I say.
Amerigo Vesdouchey
She seems like girl next door Hott and yo-yo 'bag is getting his grease all over her. This upsets me greatly. Just what I didn't need on a Monday morning. Damn you, yo-yo 'bag. Damn you I say.
Amerigo Vesdouchey
# posted by : 8:14 AM
: 8:14 AM
Douches made my Blogger crash after I wrote an elegant post in honor of Yo-Yo Bag's hot. Damn Blogger. Now I don't feel like typing it again.
Yo-Yo FTW.
Yo-Yo FTW.
@bcs....i have no idea where that came from. but i thought it was as funny as hell. what are 'gravy skins' anyway?
# posted by : 8:19 AM
: 8:19 AM
It's gotta be yo-yo bag.
The other two have strong douche affectations, but seem like generally nice guys who may have even been turned douchier by the bleethes around them.
Yo-yo bag just has undeniable douche essence. Plus he's pawing that big brown-eyed, apple-cheeked cutie and that makes me want to hack off the offending arm with the shards of a broken Zima bottle.
The other two have strong douche affectations, but seem like generally nice guys who may have even been turned douchier by the bleethes around them.
Yo-yo bag just has undeniable douche essence. Plus he's pawing that big brown-eyed, apple-cheeked cutie and that makes me want to hack off the offending arm with the shards of a broken Zima bottle.
# posted by : 8:23 AM
: 8:23 AM
@pfah i believe it's when gravy sits for a while and develops a coagulated layer of "skin" on the top. yeah i was crackin up picturing you inside of a horse eating gravy skins
Yo-Yo ftw. He clearly fits the classic douchebag mold more than the other two. If there were a portion of the HoS just dedicated to hand gestures, this one would be in it. What a douchebag.
I gotta go with Yo Yo 'Bag. I want to give props to Kid Scrote for being a total freakin' douche though. It almost required that if you want to make it in the music biz, at least 2 members of the band have to be total douches - here's one of them. But Yo Yo just has that true douchiness about it. And a hott that's disguising her feeling of "get me the hell outta here" with a sweet, innocent smile. Only the 'bag hunters can see through it and understand the pain and agony she is suffering at the very moment. So Hott, come to ScroteBob, and you will be saved.
A beautiful week, to be sure, though not as difficult as it seems.
In third place is Kid Scrote & the Bewbs. While he does seem to have his fair share of scrotitude, nothing about him really stands out for a weekly winner. While the Bewbs does have two standout strengths, her big sunglasses and platinum hair just rub me the wrong way. Next!
Your steely stare makes you the tough guy at the bar, Inflation 'Bag. It's clear you have a temper as quick as Speedy Gonzalez, but you're just an above average douche. We can all go into any trendy bar any given night and find a dozen of you. We have to admire your fine hott from the corners of our eyes, for fear of you getting up in our faces. And fine she is.
So our clear winner is none other than Yo-Yo 'Bag. Before dwelling on him, let's take a moment to delight in that leopard-print piece of heaven that he is molesting. Her shiny auburn locks draped loosely on the delicate curves of her soulder. Her ideal bone structure revealed in a glowing smile eminating from a perfect petite mouth. A saucy little dress with a V on the front revealing a corpulant hint of two sandy dunes--except they're rudely obstructed by Veiny McRinghand. And then we're drawn to Duke Duche himself. His other hand contorted into the same gesture my crippled grandfather's hand was permanently positioned into. The suit jacket over the undershirt. The hat at a 170 degree angel. A wristband of some kind. His eyes, squinted into an angle made vile by his putrid face. And that hand. Oh, that hand doing so many wrongs, the Taliban would chop it off for its many crimes. Not only does it obscure the aforementioned Cleavage from Heaven, but it manages to grope that which it does not deserve at the same time! Such a disgusting display provides proof that there is no god and no justice in the universe. "Congratulations," Yo-Yo 'Bag.
In third place is Kid Scrote & the Bewbs. While he does seem to have his fair share of scrotitude, nothing about him really stands out for a weekly winner. While the Bewbs does have two standout strengths, her big sunglasses and platinum hair just rub me the wrong way. Next!
Your steely stare makes you the tough guy at the bar, Inflation 'Bag. It's clear you have a temper as quick as Speedy Gonzalez, but you're just an above average douche. We can all go into any trendy bar any given night and find a dozen of you. We have to admire your fine hott from the corners of our eyes, for fear of you getting up in our faces. And fine she is.
So our clear winner is none other than Yo-Yo 'Bag. Before dwelling on him, let's take a moment to delight in that leopard-print piece of heaven that he is molesting. Her shiny auburn locks draped loosely on the delicate curves of her soulder. Her ideal bone structure revealed in a glowing smile eminating from a perfect petite mouth. A saucy little dress with a V on the front revealing a corpulant hint of two sandy dunes--except they're rudely obstructed by Veiny McRinghand. And then we're drawn to Duke Duche himself. His other hand contorted into the same gesture my crippled grandfather's hand was permanently positioned into. The suit jacket over the undershirt. The hat at a 170 degree angel. A wristband of some kind. His eyes, squinted into an angle made vile by his putrid face. And that hand. Oh, that hand doing so many wrongs, the Taliban would chop it off for its many crimes. Not only does it obscure the aforementioned Cleavage from Heaven, but it manages to grope that which it does not deserve at the same time! Such a disgusting display provides proof that there is no god and no justice in the universe. "Congratulations," Yo-Yo 'Bag.
@bcs....thanks dude. i was thinking that gravy skin was something more like this
# posted by : 8:46 AM
: 8:46 AM
The Yo-Yo Bag - hands down - and by "hands down" I mean get your paws of her you damn dirty Douche!
She is a Mary Ann-Hott looking to escape the sandpaper chin and stenchbreath of Duncan the Yo-Yo 'Bag.
She is a Mary Ann-Hott looking to escape the sandpaper chin and stenchbreath of Duncan the Yo-Yo 'Bag.
I have to go with Yo-Yo Bag FTW.
I've decided this one mostly on the merits - or lack thereof - of the hott(s). The first too just look too crabby. And by crabby, I'm not talking about their personalities.
I've decided this one mostly on the merits - or lack thereof - of the hott(s). The first too just look too crabby. And by crabby, I'm not talking about their personalities.
# posted by : 8:49 AM
: 8:49 AM
yo yo bag. the first 2 don't really feel like true bags, but who am i to judge.
# posted by : 9:06 AM
: 9:06 AM
looks like Yo-Yo is running away with this one, as he should- what with the Hottie being so delicious and all.
I only wish he were more douchey so I could hate him more, but without dogtag bling and no seriousness in the face, his doucheyness is far from rampant. Then again, that V-neck thing is making a strong bidding for auto-douche status.
-Jonezy
I only wish he were more douchey so I could hate him more, but without dogtag bling and no seriousness in the face, his doucheyness is far from rampant. Then again, that V-neck thing is making a strong bidding for auto-douche status.
-Jonezy
This guy just reinvented the glasses look. Harry Carry's on his face and his loco shades on the hat. Since the induction of Bitches and drinks, I have been looking for scrotes that look more the part. This guy does. Bitches and drinks is legendary, but he looks like a 6th level dungeon master.
Is that a beer cozy on that long neck?
Is that a beer cozy on that long neck?
# posted by : 9:15 AM
: 9:15 AM
sorry about the above comment. Blogger was acting all gay-like.......
I voted for Yo Yo bag. The above should go in the ask DB1....
I voted for Yo Yo bag. The above should go in the ask DB1....
# posted by : 9:16 AM
: 9:16 AM
Yo-Yo Bag, ftw. He's the only finalist that I actually want to hiss at like a cat.
Inflation Bag and Kid Scrote have been, IMO, simply out-douched.
Inflation Bag and Kid Scrote have been, IMO, simply out-douched.
Yo-yo bag FTW. He clearly has some Jedouche-mind trick power over his hott, such that she hasn't noticed how she's throwing her life (read outrageously cute smile and great sweater puppies) down the drain. This pair makes me want to die.
YoYo Bag. Kid Scrote and his babe look too much like a celebrity couple, and Inflation Bag looks like just an old douche who thinks he has game, but not the biggest douche in the world.
# posted by : 10:05 AM
: 10:05 AM
Yo-Yo 'Bag FTW
Let me count the ways:
1. Reverse ten degree hat tilt (surely a Yankees cap
2. Green "douche strong" bracelet
3. Fucked-up hand gesture
4. Dumb-ass expression on face
Leopard Katie Holmes does not give off the vibe of total skankdom that the two hotts do. Not at all. I bet she's still a virgin. I'm crossing my fingers at least. She "does it" for me.
Let me count the ways:
1. Reverse ten degree hat tilt (surely a Yankees cap
2. Green "douche strong" bracelet
3. Fucked-up hand gesture
4. Dumb-ass expression on face
Leopard Katie Holmes does not give off the vibe of total skankdom that the two hotts do. Not at all. I bet she's still a virgin. I'm crossing my fingers at least. She "does it" for me.
# posted by : 10:06 AM
: 10:06 AM
inflation bags ftw.
because they are a really dumb looking couple, and by dumb, i mean lacking in intelligence.
plus inflated boobie bags!
because they are a really dumb looking couple, and by dumb, i mean lacking in intelligence.
plus inflated boobie bags!
# posted by : 10:08 AM
: 10:08 AM
Have to go with Yo-yo bag. Only a douche of the highest order would use this pristine mountain spring hott as a seeing-eye dog. My only consolation is that this hott's dad probably gouged his eyes out. Plus the use of the retarded half-cousin of Peaches point doesn't help. Plus I got a thing for brunette's
# posted by : 10:16 AM
: 10:16 AM
I can't vote for Inflation 'Bag, because I'm afraid he'd kick my ass. Kid Scrote gets my my vote, because his douche "flair" is way over the top, and Key Lime Hott looks like a three-input kinda gal!
# posted by : 10:39 AM
: 10:39 AM
The first two do not have the proper effect on me, but the Yo-Yo 'Bag does it right. Instead of the puzzled "wait... what?" feeling the first two give me, Y-Y'B has FedEx Expressed to me the sudden urge to punish the next squirrel that wanders past my window. Groped girl, on the other hand, provides slightly different urges.
Yo-yo bag. Even though he seems like a wannabe bag to me, he has the hottest hott, and in any case beats the competition.
douche equis
douche equis
# posted by : 10:58 AM
: 10:58 AM
yo yo bag ftw. this guy is in early stages of federbag-ness. he has a way to go yet, still rocks hanes v-neck, and 10 deg. tilt, but only demonstrates some of federbags undeserved sense of entitlement, keenly observed by ted scrotgan. this guy stays in the game for another few years and we might have a pretty powerful bag of scrote.
# posted by : 11:18 AM
: 11:18 AM
Kid Scrote. C'mon people, Yo Yo Bags are a dime a dozen. Though the hat over the eyebrows look is incredibly douchetacular, I will give you that.
I'm gonna have to go with yo-yo for this one. The hott is just so adorable I want to call the SWAT team in to save her from the leech thats clinging to her back. I missed reaming this choad the first time around. WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING WITH HIS HANDS. It's like a cross between a shaka and a peace sign. The hat has GOT to be a NY Yankees hat. He's so fucking oblivious to the fact that the hott is gonna turn around and gouge out his eyes it's priceless. She's looking at the camera man as if to say "Thanks for giving him another excuse to grab my boob jackass." Rocker boy and his girl are actually sort of cute, the obviously like each other, in a sickly candied tattoo kinda way.
GAHHH! Damn, Pfah, uncle! Uncle! It was me; I'm sorry!! No more gravy skin comments!! mercy....
As I vomit into my shoe, I pick inflation bag. Because it made me sad when he cried about the litter, sitting up there on his horse with his little head band on. So it's the least I could do.
Plus, boobies.
As I vomit into my shoe, I pick inflation bag. Because it made me sad when he cried about the litter, sitting up there on his horse with his little head band on. So it's the least I could do.
Plus, boobies.
Yo-Yo 'Bag
He unleashes that classic doucheosity which has been sorely missing on this site in recent months. He is definitely from either Long Island or Jersey. Annoying grin, one hand on breast, douche hand gesture #69, and a blazer over a wife-beater. Pure scrote.
He unleashes that classic doucheosity which has been sorely missing on this site in recent months. He is definitely from either Long Island or Jersey. Annoying grin, one hand on breast, douche hand gesture #69, and a blazer over a wife-beater. Pure scrote.
# posted by : 12:44 PM
: 12:44 PM
Inflation 'Bag's a chode, but he screams "mid-life crisis" a lot louder than "douche." His hottie could charge Spitzer $50,000!
SHE's the bigger douche in Kid Scrote. He actually reminds me of a guy I played in a band with in college. Can't vote for him. Paris wannabe herself can take a flying leap. I won't vote for him for the weekly, but I'll nominate her for a Darwin Award.
Speaking of Evolutionary Dead-Ends, we have Yo Yo. He gets my vote. He's a douche and not only does he know it, he loves it. He's douche for the sake of douche. He could have his arm around Duncan and still think he's fly. I see so much insecurity in her wasted smile. She would rather be with a douche for all the wrong reasons, than be alone for the right ones. Sad.
SHE's the bigger douche in Kid Scrote. He actually reminds me of a guy I played in a band with in college. Can't vote for him. Paris wannabe herself can take a flying leap. I won't vote for him for the weekly, but I'll nominate her for a Darwin Award.
Speaking of Evolutionary Dead-Ends, we have Yo Yo. He gets my vote. He's a douche and not only does he know it, he loves it. He's douche for the sake of douche. He could have his arm around Duncan and still think he's fly. I see so much insecurity in her wasted smile. She would rather be with a douche for all the wrong reasons, than be alone for the right ones. Sad.
Inflation 'Bag's a chode, but he screams "mid-life crisis" a lot louder than "douche." His hottie could charge Spitzer $50,000!
SHE's the bigger douche in Kid Scrote. He actually reminds me of a guy I played in a band with in college. Can't vote for him. Paris wannabe herself can take a flying leap. I won't vote for him for the weekly, but I'll nominate her for a Darwin Award.
Speaking of Evolutionary Dead-Ends, we have Yo Yo. He gets my vote. He's a douche and not only does he know it, he loves it. He's douche for the sake of douche. He could have his arm around Duncan and still think he's fly. I see so much insecurity in her wasted smile. She would rather be with a douche for all the wrong reasons, than be alone for the right ones. Sad.
SHE's the bigger douche in Kid Scrote. He actually reminds me of a guy I played in a band with in college. Can't vote for him. Paris wannabe herself can take a flying leap. I won't vote for him for the weekly, but I'll nominate her for a Darwin Award.
Speaking of Evolutionary Dead-Ends, we have Yo Yo. He gets my vote. He's a douche and not only does he know it, he loves it. He's douche for the sake of douche. He could have his arm around Duncan and still think he's fly. I see so much insecurity in her wasted smile. She would rather be with a douche for all the wrong reasons, than be alone for the right ones. Sad.
Kid Scrote is a clone who mates with Bleeth Bombshells as a fact of life.
Inflation 'bag is awful but enough like the burnt-out husk of a late-80's WWF Wrestler that he's a benign tumor.
Meanwhile, Yo-Yo 'bag is drowsily fondling my adult life's version of the girl-I-once-saw-at-summer-camp. She makes me think about love. After our first year together, she'd never wear leopard print outside the bedroom again.
So Yo-Yo 'bag FTW because he is a gelatin slab of parasitic ooze who once ran over a dog in his Escalade and laughed. I hope he get trampled at the MTV beach house.
Inflation 'bag is awful but enough like the burnt-out husk of a late-80's WWF Wrestler that he's a benign tumor.
Meanwhile, Yo-Yo 'bag is drowsily fondling my adult life's version of the girl-I-once-saw-at-summer-camp. She makes me think about love. After our first year together, she'd never wear leopard print outside the bedroom again.
So Yo-Yo 'bag FTW because he is a gelatin slab of parasitic ooze who once ran over a dog in his Escalade and laughed. I hope he get trampled at the MTV beach house.
# posted by : 1:18 PM
: 1:18 PM
Yo-yo bag by a grope. I did go up and down and then back and forth on this one.
# posted by : 1:27 PM
: 1:27 PM
Yo-yo Bag for the win, hands down. As DB1 put it, something screams out porn star when you look at Inflation Bag......besides, his blank stare and lost eyes tell me he may be, instead of an Inflation Bag, an Autistic Bag.
In regards to Kid Scrote, he does not possess the doucheface but does the mandana. His chick is nut-worthy and offers some wonderful side-boob but is not even on Yo-yo's girl's level. I would trade 2 of DB1's six packs of PBR for one slap in the balls from her.
Yo-yo Bag has the hottest chick, has the ill 10 degree hat tilt to the back, douchebag hand gesture #34, hnad on lovely titty, some middle finger bling plus the bastid has a V-neck t-shirt. Yo-yo Bag has the ability to be a monthly bag.
In regards to Kid Scrote, he does not possess the doucheface but does the mandana. His chick is nut-worthy and offers some wonderful side-boob but is not even on Yo-yo's girl's level. I would trade 2 of DB1's six packs of PBR for one slap in the balls from her.
Yo-yo Bag has the hottest chick, has the ill 10 degree hat tilt to the back, douchebag hand gesture #34, hnad on lovely titty, some middle finger bling plus the bastid has a V-neck t-shirt. Yo-yo Bag has the ability to be a monthly bag.
# posted by : 2:07 PM
: 2:07 PM
I have to give it to Kid Scrote despite the fact that he looks very much like Dave Kusworth, one of my favorite semi-obscure rawk singers. Unfortunately he probably considers LA Guns to be da shizznitt. Also, I think the douche-to-hott ratio is the most extreme in his case. Good luck, Scrote-man. And by good luck I mean your gal causes penile turgidness.
# posted by : 2:34 PM
: 2:34 PM
yo-yo bag wins hands down this week...looks like he begged this girl or even paid her to get the picture, just to put it on his myspace page. His face screams "Yo, you gotta get in this picture for my boy Sully's burfday...c'mon" Looks like they're in some club hallway, she's trapped and can't say no, the twitch of her eye is turning into a cringe; otherwise the dank underside of his douchiness i.e."rage" will come out. These club douches are fucking dangerous...i also think his admiration for dane cook really shines, though he can't quite remember hand signals with all the douche fluid clogging what few neurons are firing...
# posted by : 2:56 PM
: 2:56 PM
I'm going to have to go with yo-yo bag. Its a classic example of old-school douchiness. That poor hott he has in a head lock hopefully punched him in the nuts immediately after this pic was taken. Of course the grease that this dude secretes probably made her punch slide right off of him.
Yo-Yo Bag has replicated the formula for Douchebaggery. Tilted hat + hand move that isn't even cool to 4th grade wiggers, stupid face + strangling an oblivious hottie hott hott = DBotW
# posted by : 3:30 PM
: 3:30 PM
I just can't vote for Inflation 'bag cuz he has the same strong cleft chin my Dad had. Kinda looks like him too, if Dad had popped anabolics and dug on faggy lycra tops. I don't think Inflation 'bag should win the weekly. He might hunt down db1 and go all Chris Benoit on him.
Motley Cruer and his groupie are diseased, but seem inexplicably happy. Short bus love is kinda blissful looking.
FTW - That arthritic DOUCHESTRONG Yo Yo 'Bag. He's a serial scrote coyly masquerading as a dofus in a Fruit of the Loom undershirt paired with a velvet jacket. Is there really a hood on that Goodwill bin garment? Like many of us, I'm frightened for lovely Jungle Jane. Where the fuck has he got her trapped? Any room that has metal siding with rivets can't be safe. This photo has to win by the shear poignancy of the disaster this poor girl has let her cheekbones wander into. Sad. So very sad.
Motley Cruer and his groupie are diseased, but seem inexplicably happy. Short bus love is kinda blissful looking.
FTW - That arthritic DOUCHESTRONG Yo Yo 'Bag. He's a serial scrote coyly masquerading as a dofus in a Fruit of the Loom undershirt paired with a velvet jacket. Is there really a hood on that Goodwill bin garment? Like many of us, I'm frightened for lovely Jungle Jane. Where the fuck has he got her trapped? Any room that has metal siding with rivets can't be safe. This photo has to win by the shear poignancy of the disaster this poor girl has let her cheekbones wander into. Sad. So very sad.
# posted by : 3:32 PM
: 3:32 PM
Inflation Bag - older hott with some nice flotation devices. He's got a look that says "touch my hott and I'll rip your throat out" but yet is sipping a drink from a straw.
Kid Scrote - mandana, excessive tats, pants down to his ass and hugging what can best be described as a Stripper Hott. It's like Pam and Tommy Lee's body doubles.
Yo-Yo Bag - he looks like he's had one too many Miller Lites, is wearing a t-shirt with a jacket, has what appears to be a green watch or a Livestrong bracelet and there's the bad turned hat.
But NOTHING is as disgusting as Yo-Yo's veiled cup-grabbing maneuver. That the hott is a true hott (not enhanced or on the verge of Bleeth) and his greasy palms anywhere near the holy mounds only makes this picture truly hate-worthy.
Yo-Yo ftw
Kid Scrote - mandana, excessive tats, pants down to his ass and hugging what can best be described as a Stripper Hott. It's like Pam and Tommy Lee's body doubles.
Yo-Yo Bag - he looks like he's had one too many Miller Lites, is wearing a t-shirt with a jacket, has what appears to be a green watch or a Livestrong bracelet and there's the bad turned hat.
But NOTHING is as disgusting as Yo-Yo's veiled cup-grabbing maneuver. That the hott is a true hott (not enhanced or on the verge of Bleeth) and his greasy palms anywhere near the holy mounds only makes this picture truly hate-worthy.
Yo-Yo ftw
# posted by : 3:44 PM
: 3:44 PM
Inflation bag's look of vague suspicion wins my vote. The little pea whirring in his head is wondering, "will this show up on the internet? Can I lose my job at Gold's gymn for this?"
Well, Pumpy, the answer is yes!
Well, Pumpy, the answer is yes!
# posted by : 3:48 PM
: 3:48 PM
I don't understand all the love for yo-yo bag. Looks like a drunk guy just fooling around. Inflation bag, on the other hand, is obviously full of shit, and that's what defines a douchebag for me. Take a close look at his pic. He's the real winner, er loser, here.
# posted by : 4:26 PM
: 4:26 PM
@burnsy:
"Kid Scrote has the mandana, the unfinished sleeve, a studded white belt and a full-on Bleethe. He's pretty Buckcherried, that's for sure."
Yes!!! That is what has been lurking, unidentified, in the back of my head since this outrage assaulted my eyes. Thanks for giving my suffering a name.
Inflation 'Bag: Meh. Just another big dumb guy whose girlfriend dresses him and wipes his drool when they go out together in public. She probably even gels his hair while he scratches himself and belches. And acres of boobies aside, her hair is the color of box wine and she's wearing darksocks cock rings in her ears.
Yo-yo: Low level of douchosity here. Looks like a 2.5 GPA community college kid who stumbled upon a copy of Details magazine in his dentist's office and was totally impressed by a photo spread that showing hoodies worn with blazers. You just know that's a Yankees cap, right?
Too bad he didn't notice that the issue was from January 2003.
He's inept at the Pumpy Boob Grab as well. I wouldn't honor such failure with the high honor of The Weekly.
Which brings us back to Kid Scrote The Unwashed, and his Significant Bleeth, Haley Pantypudding.
The unholy pairing of the oversized mandana to keep his lice-infested pelt out of his eyes, and her swim attire created by the shaky feeble hands of her saintly Grandma Nell as she quietly fades in her final days at the Trail's End retirement facility, leaves us with one nagging question:
Whose wet suit hangs in the background and is it used for kinky sex games involving six boxes of out-dated Rice Krispies, a bucket of spoiled kiwi fruit, a trampoline, and twelve liters of imported cat urine?
And if not, why not?
Oh, and boobies.
Kid Scrote, FTW.
"Kid Scrote has the mandana, the unfinished sleeve, a studded white belt and a full-on Bleethe. He's pretty Buckcherried, that's for sure."
Yes!!! That is what has been lurking, unidentified, in the back of my head since this outrage assaulted my eyes. Thanks for giving my suffering a name.
Inflation 'Bag: Meh. Just another big dumb guy whose girlfriend dresses him and wipes his drool when they go out together in public. She probably even gels his hair while he scratches himself and belches. And acres of boobies aside, her hair is the color of box wine and she's wearing darksocks cock rings in her ears.
Yo-yo: Low level of douchosity here. Looks like a 2.5 GPA community college kid who stumbled upon a copy of Details magazine in his dentist's office and was totally impressed by a photo spread that showing hoodies worn with blazers. You just know that's a Yankees cap, right?
Too bad he didn't notice that the issue was from January 2003.
He's inept at the Pumpy Boob Grab as well. I wouldn't honor such failure with the high honor of The Weekly.
Which brings us back to Kid Scrote The Unwashed, and his Significant Bleeth, Haley Pantypudding.
The unholy pairing of the oversized mandana to keep his lice-infested pelt out of his eyes, and her swim attire created by the shaky feeble hands of her saintly Grandma Nell as she quietly fades in her final days at the Trail's End retirement facility, leaves us with one nagging question:
Whose wet suit hangs in the background and is it used for kinky sex games involving six boxes of out-dated Rice Krispies, a bucket of spoiled kiwi fruit, a trampoline, and twelve liters of imported cat urine?
And if not, why not?
Oh, and boobies.
Kid Scrote, FTW.
@anon 2:56 --
You just triggered a deep rage within my soul when you published those two small words:
Dane. Cook.
Whose most recent claims to fame were co-starring in OldBag Kevin Kostner's last film (as a struggling young serial killer) and playing opposite tranny mess Jessica Simpson in "Employee of the Month". An artiste, in the truest sense. The sense of poo.
This revelation puts things in a whole new light, my friend.
It allows me to fully recognize the wholesomeness threatened by the sloppy-drunk, proto-Federline choad wearing a pit-stained undershirt he found on the floor in his apartment building's laundry room.
She looks like the kind of elementary school teacher that would cause most first-grade boys to immediately lose interest in flicking boogers and giggling at the word "butthole". Her ethereal radiance is unencumbered by ho-riffic makeup and Detroit press-on nails. Her hair is silken and lush, like the Argentine pampas after a early morning rain.
And there's also the most discreet hint of honey-toned cleavite.
Others in this thread are probably correct in their assumption that seconds after this image was captured for all eternity, Scott, her square-jawed, all-American fiance home on leave from his second tour of Iraq, came back from getting her a refresh on her Diet Coke, and found her politely trying to chase the little scrote back into his flock of douche.
And using just a shoelace, a drink coaster, a pool cue, and a handful of dry roasted peanuts... Let's just say that Yo-Yo won't have the pleasure of experiencing tough, overcooked steak anytime in the near future. Like before he turns 30.
You just triggered a deep rage within my soul when you published those two small words:
Dane. Cook.
Whose most recent claims to fame were co-starring in OldBag Kevin Kostner's last film (as a struggling young serial killer) and playing opposite tranny mess Jessica Simpson in "Employee of the Month". An artiste, in the truest sense. The sense of poo.
This revelation puts things in a whole new light, my friend.
It allows me to fully recognize the wholesomeness threatened by the sloppy-drunk, proto-Federline choad wearing a pit-stained undershirt he found on the floor in his apartment building's laundry room.
She looks like the kind of elementary school teacher that would cause most first-grade boys to immediately lose interest in flicking boogers and giggling at the word "butthole". Her ethereal radiance is unencumbered by ho-riffic makeup and Detroit press-on nails. Her hair is silken and lush, like the Argentine pampas after a early morning rain.
And there's also the most discreet hint of honey-toned cleavite.
Others in this thread are probably correct in their assumption that seconds after this image was captured for all eternity, Scott, her square-jawed, all-American fiance home on leave from his second tour of Iraq, came back from getting her a refresh on her Diet Coke, and found her politely trying to chase the little scrote back into his flock of douche.
And using just a shoelace, a drink coaster, a pool cue, and a handful of dry roasted peanuts... Let's just say that Yo-Yo won't have the pleasure of experiencing tough, overcooked steak anytime in the near future. Like before he turns 30.
Yo-Yo wins it; I'm still recovering from Deathtongue, and the others just aren't as philosophically inspiring.
# posted by : 5:33 PM
: 5:33 PM
Kid Scrote.
Because the pant-shorts stopped being cool about 10 years ago.
So did showing your boxers just above your pants.
And so did mandanas.
And the whole "scruffy dirt-ball with a heart of gold" act.
....I think someone is missing a time machine.
Because the pant-shorts stopped being cool about 10 years ago.
So did showing your boxers just above your pants.
And so did mandanas.
And the whole "scruffy dirt-ball with a heart of gold" act.
....I think someone is missing a time machine.
Inflation: "Did I say you could take a picture? Go ahead and get cute, I'll break your fookin ears off and feed em to my dogs." Nice hott, looks like big trouble all around. -meh-
Kid Scrote: You know what? He looks like a douche, but dammit, I can't hate on the guy. If he's clever enough to get an armful of California Dream, then good on him. The mandana is tempting, but overall looks like two kids happy to be fucking each other's brains out nightly (and at brunch).
Yo-Yo: Now here's what douchebaggery is all about. This guy, slides up to a lonely girl at the club. She's trying to unwind and he's trying to mack as hard as macks can mack. And her asshole friends think it's funny. Instead of rescuing her, they take a picture so they can all reminisce on Monday about the fool that thought he was gonna make good, Federline style. But a fun joke goes horribly awry as the pre-meditated boob job is executed and everyone just pulls a stupid face.
Yo-Yo. By a nose and a half. I hope it felt good buddy. And GOT DIZZAMN she is fiiiine.
Kid Scrote: You know what? He looks like a douche, but dammit, I can't hate on the guy. If he's clever enough to get an armful of California Dream, then good on him. The mandana is tempting, but overall looks like two kids happy to be fucking each other's brains out nightly (and at brunch).
Yo-Yo: Now here's what douchebaggery is all about. This guy, slides up to a lonely girl at the club. She's trying to unwind and he's trying to mack as hard as macks can mack. And her asshole friends think it's funny. Instead of rescuing her, they take a picture so they can all reminisce on Monday about the fool that thought he was gonna make good, Federline style. But a fun joke goes horribly awry as the pre-meditated boob job is executed and everyone just pulls a stupid face.
Yo-Yo. By a nose and a half. I hope it felt good buddy. And GOT DIZZAMN she is fiiiine.
Inflation 'Bag doesn't fulfill all the qualities of a HCwDB, in my opinion. The so-called "hot chick" is nothing more than a supreme pair of boobies attached to an unremarkable girl, and the "douchebag" is more like a neanderthal caveman who isn't quite sure what he's looking at (hence the inquisitive gaze).
Kid Scrote confuses me. Other than the mandana, tattoos, and shirtlessness, he doesn't really scream "douchebag" to me. Although I think I detect a hint of boob-graze in his left hand...
Regardless, Yo-Yo Bag is my vote for this week. He looks like a guy who smoked way too much of something he shouldn't have, except he didn't actually smoke anything, so he just looks like that naturally. He is also throwing up one of the myriad douche-signs we use to classify these abominations of human nature, and isn't even attempting subtlety in his boob-grab, which this perfect little ball of cuteness does not deserve.
Kid Scrote confuses me. Other than the mandana, tattoos, and shirtlessness, he doesn't really scream "douchebag" to me. Although I think I detect a hint of boob-graze in his left hand...
Regardless, Yo-Yo Bag is my vote for this week. He looks like a guy who smoked way too much of something he shouldn't have, except he didn't actually smoke anything, so he just looks like that naturally. He is also throwing up one of the myriad douche-signs we use to classify these abominations of human nature, and isn't even attempting subtlety in his boob-grab, which this perfect little ball of cuteness does not deserve.
# posted by : 5:56 PM
: 5:56 PM
Inflation 'Bag: There are three huge bags in this picture. Two of them need rescuing. And squeezing.
Kid Scrote: Don't even get me started.
Yo-Yo 'Bag: This was a Saturday morning cartoon that bitch-slapped me out of a bleary 8AM stupor. I didn't find it funny at all.
At first I thought it should be Yo-Yo 'Bag, but Kid Scrote edges him out. Why? Because pull up your fucking pants. That's why.
Kid Scrote: Don't even get me started.
Yo-Yo 'Bag: This was a Saturday morning cartoon that bitch-slapped me out of a bleary 8AM stupor. I didn't find it funny at all.
At first I thought it should be Yo-Yo 'Bag, but Kid Scrote edges him out. Why? Because pull up your fucking pants. That's why.
Man, I'm looking at these pictures, trying to wrap my mind around all of the "winners" who grace our presence today. I still don't know who I'm picking, I figure I'll talk myself into one of these folks as I go through this.
Inflation 'Bag is out to me. Number one, I believe he is holding himself back from jumping through the screen and ripping my head off. Number two, they're just a little bit too perfect, I'm not sure who's had more work done, but both of them should lay off the knifeage.
Kid Scrote, who is rocking the "Hed P.E." look down to perfection. There's nothing I like more than a 20 year old kid trying to look like Nikki Sixx, and ANYONE who wants to look like Nikki Sixx needs to check himself. I'm guessing he's a surfer, and I really can't rag on a surfer, being a former surfer bag myself. She however brings me back to my previous point about too much work. I actually think she is faker than the previous girly, there is NOTHING real about her, from her head to her sheet she's wearing.
Yo-Yo Bag, ah man, this one hurts. I'm going to try to discuss this without resorting to random curse words directed at G-Dawg's mother and her people. She is just beautiful, I wouldn't change a thing about her face-wise, she has to be in the discussion for best face ever on this site. As for our homie in the back, why would ANYONE want to wear a t-shirt with a blazer? I swear to god and/or gods if he is wearing jeans, it's fucking over...OK, Breathe, in, out... OK, better.. I'm going to say that he's probably wearing a Tampa Bay Devil Rays hat, trying to be ironic, and she looks like her hand is slowly reaching for a knife to jack homies face, and that's OK with me. Plus, ring on her, no ring on him, therefore, at least he's not leaving with her.
So, that brings us to this question, does questionable hottie with douchie dude trump unbelievable hottie with minor douche? That is the question that plagues me. So shit... alright, Yo-Yo wins, just because that is the only picture that truly makes me angry. Plus, anyone that seems to be partying in an airplane hangar is enough of a jackass to get my vote.
Inflation 'Bag is out to me. Number one, I believe he is holding himself back from jumping through the screen and ripping my head off. Number two, they're just a little bit too perfect, I'm not sure who's had more work done, but both of them should lay off the knifeage.
Kid Scrote, who is rocking the "Hed P.E." look down to perfection. There's nothing I like more than a 20 year old kid trying to look like Nikki Sixx, and ANYONE who wants to look like Nikki Sixx needs to check himself. I'm guessing he's a surfer, and I really can't rag on a surfer, being a former surfer bag myself. She however brings me back to my previous point about too much work. I actually think she is faker than the previous girly, there is NOTHING real about her, from her head to her sheet she's wearing.
Yo-Yo Bag, ah man, this one hurts. I'm going to try to discuss this without resorting to random curse words directed at G-Dawg's mother and her people. She is just beautiful, I wouldn't change a thing about her face-wise, she has to be in the discussion for best face ever on this site. As for our homie in the back, why would ANYONE want to wear a t-shirt with a blazer? I swear to god and/or gods if he is wearing jeans, it's fucking over...OK, Breathe, in, out... OK, better.. I'm going to say that he's probably wearing a Tampa Bay Devil Rays hat, trying to be ironic, and she looks like her hand is slowly reaching for a knife to jack homies face, and that's OK with me. Plus, ring on her, no ring on him, therefore, at least he's not leaving with her.
So, that brings us to this question, does questionable hottie with douchie dude trump unbelievable hottie with minor douche? That is the question that plagues me. So shit... alright, Yo-Yo wins, just because that is the only picture that truly makes me angry. Plus, anyone that seems to be partying in an airplane hangar is enough of a jackass to get my vote.
pfah, you have ruined my life, please never post a picture like that again. Not even words... I've heard of "popping raisins", but come on, this is ridiculous...
Nothing really clever to add, but I'll give it to Yo-Yo 'Bag. Just makes me want to punch my screen...
oh my these idiots are like Pam and Tommy wannabe's , it horrific, douche all over the place. Two fuck ups are enough, why imitate....
# posted by : 7:06 PM
: 7:06 PM
Yo-Yo bag gets my vote. My first analysis left him in second place untill i noticed his right handed bag gesture #136 coupled with his left handed boobie placement.
# posted by : 7:53 PM
: 7:53 PM
Has to be Yo-Yo Bag. Not only is he flopping the meat hook over the hottie's lovlies, but that ring hand of hers in on a counter -- looks like she's trying not to get pushed to the ground by his drunken floppiness.
Inflaion Bag, he's mild douche at best. the shannon elizabeth look-alike with him is giving HIM the boob rub. I can almost hear the squeaking - like Jessica Rabbit.
Kid Scrote, well, he's taking on all her weight. He's got the look of a douche in shock.
So, in my view, whatever Inflation Bag and Kid Scrote are up to in the douchebaggery dept (and they are up to a lot), they were plowing their way on to some other douchetablishment when they were jumped by the Hotts.
Yo-Yo Bag reached his douchey destination. And damn him for it. His Hott makes several parts of my body ache.
Inflaion Bag, he's mild douche at best. the shannon elizabeth look-alike with him is giving HIM the boob rub. I can almost hear the squeaking - like Jessica Rabbit.
Kid Scrote, well, he's taking on all her weight. He's got the look of a douche in shock.
So, in my view, whatever Inflation Bag and Kid Scrote are up to in the douchebaggery dept (and they are up to a lot), they were plowing their way on to some other douchetablishment when they were jumped by the Hotts.
Yo-Yo Bag reached his douchey destination. And damn him for it. His Hott makes several parts of my body ache.
# posted by : 8:41 PM
: 8:41 PM
tough bracket.
i'm going to employ the girlfriend's bracketology of picking her favorite mascots to win with picking this weeks winner on the sole basis DB1's best one-liner evah: the bob dole hand gesture.
Yo Yo Bag FTW
i'm going to employ the girlfriend's bracketology of picking her favorite mascots to win with picking this weeks winner on the sole basis DB1's best one-liner evah: the bob dole hand gesture.
Yo Yo Bag FTW
Fuck you, Kid Scrote. Instead of being the quiet, broken emo kid with a dark past that I could fantasize about in bed at night, you ruin it with muscles and mandanas and fucking face fuzz (Awesome alliteration). On top of this, you happen to be wearing your shorts lower on your hips than I wear mine. Yea... they're actually supposed to cover your ass. Weird, I know. Also, your broad has boobs bigger than her own head and her late grandmother's funeral dress wrapped helter skelter around her waist. The amount of pink and blonde on her makes me think of a stack of Peeps at the grocery store, which just might be what those tits are stuffed with. Gross. And, the glasses. Ugh.
# posted by : 9:30 PM
: 9:30 PM
Inflation bag makes me laugh because of that idiotic expression on his mug. Then you have his hott, who seems to have a very small head compared to her giant boobies. Just not enough douche here, so he's out. The next one out is yo yo bag. I know he's got the most votes here but the guy's got no game. I'd respect him if he had a firm under the boob grasp like the grenade tosser from last week but he's really very weak. If you straightened his hat, he'd lose a good 78% of his doucheness. So inspite of having fewer votes so far, I am going with Kid Scrote for the win because of his veritable cavalcade of douche markers and his comfy looking hott. And by comfy I mean like a well broken in mattress.
# posted by : 11:26 PM
: 11:26 PM
What is up with the vote this week? Yo-yo is at most a wannabe... He needs to get off the training wheels. Of course his hottie is one of the hottest hotts ever, but the instance captured in this photo was probably around the luckiest 10 seconds of his life.
Inflation and Kid Scrote are seasoned veterans... scrotes-4-life.
I vote Inflation.
Inflation and Kid Scrote are seasoned veterans... scrotes-4-life.
I vote Inflation.
# posted by : 1:41 AM
: 1:41 AM
I'm torn between Inflation and Yo-Yo but I'm going to go with Yo-Yo.
Inflation doesn't know what he's doing, or where he is, or where he lives, but he knows he's massive and all he has to do is follow the globes and his hott will get him home. Douche has to imply a level of premeditation - a level that Inflation is simply not capable of. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I rest my case.
Yo-yo. May the wind change and your fingers be given rickets for the rest of your douche-tastic life.
Inflation doesn't know what he's doing, or where he is, or where he lives, but he knows he's massive and all he has to do is follow the globes and his hott will get him home. Douche has to imply a level of premeditation - a level that Inflation is simply not capable of. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I rest my case.
Yo-yo. May the wind change and your fingers be given rickets for the rest of your douche-tastic life.
# posted by : 2:32 AM
: 2:32 AM
yo-yo all the way, the other 2 are clearly actual couples. the painfully cute girl with the yo-yo is clearly in the middle of sexual assault, check the way she's recoiling from his hand.
# posted by : 4:55 AM
: 4:55 AM
I discount inflation bag for, while she IS hott, he is at least half way towards being a fat old flabby man who tells passers-by how tough he used to be, and she will be long gone....so sad
Kid Scrote, well, he may or may not actually be able to play the guitar, he'll probably knock her up. the band will break up, and, well, 'dude, do you want to super-size that?', Also so sad, yet common...
Ah, the Sat-yo'bag, the ten-degree hat, check. MLB logo, probably black Yankees, check. Squinty, ' I'm sooooo waaasted' grin, check. Giving the combo 'just hangin' loose/look at my hott chick 'bag gesture, over the top! I don't know if it makes it better or worse that, he's not actually grabbing her boob, either way, just by the angst factor alone, it Sat-yo-'bag all the way
Kid Scrote, well, he may or may not actually be able to play the guitar, he'll probably knock her up. the band will break up, and, well, 'dude, do you want to super-size that?', Also so sad, yet common...
Ah, the Sat-yo'bag, the ten-degree hat, check. MLB logo, probably black Yankees, check. Squinty, ' I'm sooooo waaasted' grin, check. Giving the combo 'just hangin' loose/look at my hott chick 'bag gesture, over the top! I don't know if it makes it better or worse that, he's not actually grabbing her boob, either way, just by the angst factor alone, it Sat-yo-'bag all the way
# posted by : 4:59 AM
: 4:59 AM
Yo Yo Bag. No argument possible. The yo is nearly all that is douche. He looks stenciled from a master douche template. Like plato's forms in the cave, he is only the shadow, but damn it looks close to teh real thing. The tilted backwards hat, the stupid face, lame hand gesture, oh, and the club bracelet, a nice touch. Had he some bling, he would be hitting on all douche cylindars. And the offensive pawing at this lovable cutie merits the death penalty. Yo! You should be killed! KnowwhaIsayyinn?!
# posted by : 6:28 AM
: 6:28 AM
I can't believe that Inflation Bag, who shows the ten degrees of seperation between Chevy Chase, Gary Shandling and the Crying Litter Indian, is getting crushed like Cleveland Chicks.
If Florida and Michigan had been allowed to vote this would not have happened.
If Florida and Michigan had been allowed to vote this would not have happened.
Its LouAnne from the Clevland Girls! I herd our names being menshoined agian!
Sory we havn't been on here much to talk about you loosers. but we have been doin more importnant things like wokring (for muny, duh) and geting ass-crush by the hoties down at PANDROME! the hotest club in Clevland or any where!!!
I wold just like to say that any of the studds you are showing her are werthy of ME!!! LOL!!! They are all hotnes. Ecspeshully the one guy your calling "kid scrot". He remins me of a studd I met when I was vactoining down in Cannkun in Mexsicko (away from my postoin as a fashen conslutant at the zoo). He was HOTTTT!!! like this kid guy is axcept for the guy in meksiko only wanted me for my boddy. and sum coke. Not my mind or anything. The oters you are showing her are hot, but not as hot as him. So I vote for the Kid.
Love,
The Clevland girls
LouAnne
Ps - i have a new picshur!!!
Sory we havn't been on here much to talk about you loosers. but we have been doin more importnant things like wokring (for muny, duh) and geting ass-crush by the hoties down at PANDROME! the hotest club in Clevland or any where!!!
I wold just like to say that any of the studds you are showing her are werthy of ME!!! LOL!!! They are all hotnes. Ecspeshully the one guy your calling "kid scrot". He remins me of a studd I met when I was vactoining down in Cannkun in Mexsicko (away from my postoin as a fashen conslutant at the zoo). He was HOTTTT!!! like this kid guy is axcept for the guy in meksiko only wanted me for my boddy. and sum coke. Not my mind or anything. The oters you are showing her are hot, but not as hot as him. So I vote for the Kid.
Love,
The Clevland girls
LouAnne
Ps - i have a new picshur!!!
Yo-Yo, BOYYEEEE. Fuck you.
While only tepid bathwater of urine and diarrhea, compared to the boiling the boiling vat that would make a Middle Ager proud, that we are used to, I really, really, really want to let his hott maul my gazelle.
While only tepid bathwater of urine and diarrhea, compared to the boiling the boiling vat that would make a Middle Ager proud, that we are used to, I really, really, really want to let his hott maul my gazelle.
# posted by : 8:43 AM
: 8:43 AM
Well, this is harder than I thought it would be. All of our "specimens" show obvious signs of the expectation of underserved entitlement.
Inflation was the first to go, although I appreciate the "You think I won't kick your ass" look. Simply because he assumes the bag hunter is looking at his pierced heart t-shirt and not the barely restrained lovelies dominating the picture.
Kid Scrote had potential to win. But, like others, the more I look at the picture, the more I see a happy pair, that will live together for a while, happy until either his band reaches their pinnacle...house band status at a washed up roadhouse...or her "Stage Manager" at Showgirls, takes her away from her dreary life, and sells her to a white slavery ring in Japan.
Which leaves Yo-Yo. Ahh, we salute those that try too hard. He has the requirements. The hat tilt, v-neck and blazer, bag gesture #147 (with a retarded "1 in the stink" modification), green wrist band (which denotes free admission to the church carnival rides), and the horrible pedophile smile. He clearly has no game with the hotts, he simply waited outside his neighborhood Chipotle, snuck in behind crooked smile, next door hott, and accidentally tripped, grazing boob as he tried to stop himself from "falling" as his life partner snapped a photo to help use as a beard. The issue with him is he just has no game. He looks too happy to be in this picture. But his picture causes the most anal leakage.
I say yo-yo ftw. Although i truly wish Kid Scrote happiness. And by happiness I mean his hott, coming to live under my desk at work, to perform her "Community Service" to my turgidified wang.
Inflation was the first to go, although I appreciate the "You think I won't kick your ass" look. Simply because he assumes the bag hunter is looking at his pierced heart t-shirt and not the barely restrained lovelies dominating the picture.
Kid Scrote had potential to win. But, like others, the more I look at the picture, the more I see a happy pair, that will live together for a while, happy until either his band reaches their pinnacle...house band status at a washed up roadhouse...or her "Stage Manager" at Showgirls, takes her away from her dreary life, and sells her to a white slavery ring in Japan.
Which leaves Yo-Yo. Ahh, we salute those that try too hard. He has the requirements. The hat tilt, v-neck and blazer, bag gesture #147 (with a retarded "1 in the stink" modification), green wrist band (which denotes free admission to the church carnival rides), and the horrible pedophile smile. He clearly has no game with the hotts, he simply waited outside his neighborhood Chipotle, snuck in behind crooked smile, next door hott, and accidentally tripped, grazing boob as he tried to stop himself from "falling" as his life partner snapped a photo to help use as a beard. The issue with him is he just has no game. He looks too happy to be in this picture. But his picture causes the most anal leakage.
I say yo-yo ftw. Although i truly wish Kid Scrote happiness. And by happiness I mean his hott, coming to live under my desk at work, to perform her "Community Service" to my turgidified wang.
# posted by : 9:12 AM
: 9:12 AM
At first I thought this might be a tough one but the yo-yo bag is overwhelming. The emo douche is probably worse than this guy but his chick is stage 4 bleeth skank and it really doesn't bother me to see her with him. Actually I am glad that there are douchebags like him in the world to take these beat skanks out of play.
The yo-yo bag is such a raging douche bag and his hott is by far the hottest of the three. Watching him molest her chest sends me into a rage. His face just cries out for a punch and her boobies call to me for squeeze. My vote is for yo-yo the asshole douchebag.
The yo-yo bag is such a raging douche bag and his hott is by far the hottest of the three. Watching him molest her chest sends me into a rage. His face just cries out for a punch and her boobies call to me for squeeze. My vote is for yo-yo the asshole douchebag.
# posted by : 9:42 AM
: 9:42 AM
Yo-Yo Bag. That hand gesture. The half boob grab. The goofy grin. He has all the right moves. To be a giant douche.
# posted by : 9:50 AM
: 9:50 AM
yoyo bag wins but just because inflation isnt even bad (should have been a douche/not a douche) and kid scrote has enough shame on his right arm.
# posted by : 12:26 PM
: 12:26 PM
yoyo bag wins but just because inflation isnt even bad (should have been a douche/not a douche) and kid scrote has enough shame on his right arm.
# posted by : 12:26 PM
: 12:26 PM
As I have only been perusing this ultimate site for a few days..."where have i been?"....I do know the power and resillience of the permadouche. Where do they come from? How do we allow them in? Have hotts everywhere around the world all bitten from the forbidden fruit of douche? In that case, there's only one thing left for me to do here. I feel compelled to vote for Inflation 'bag, only hoping that you will see the urgency and misdirected conviction which lies upon his face. He's so full of himself, it looks like it's about to spew out his mouth. And the hott? Innocent perfection. She looks scared. As I stare at this middle aged phenom, I can't help but ask one question. Do you think that dagger really works? Gorillodouche sucks so much I almost feel sorry for him, more then I do the hott. And that's the definition, my friends of sympadouchery. And HCwDB of the Week.
# posted by : 1:30 PM
: 1:30 PM
I just read the following paragraph in Nevsky Prospect by Gogol and thought of this site:
For it is true that nothing evokes in us such sad regret as the sight of beauty touched by the rotting breath of depravity. [Paragraph goes on about all the great things a young beauty could become and ends:] --but alas! by the terrible will of some infernal spirit, hell bent on destroying the harmony of life, she had been cast with a mocking laugh into the abyss.
Sorry if this is a repost of that quote.
For it is true that nothing evokes in us such sad regret as the sight of beauty touched by the rotting breath of depravity. [Paragraph goes on about all the great things a young beauty could become and ends:] --but alas! by the terrible will of some infernal spirit, hell bent on destroying the harmony of life, she had been cast with a mocking laugh into the abyss.
Sorry if this is a repost of that quote.
michael...sorry if this is a repost...fantastic use of something one uses here for a celelbuslut or pop culture or scat reference or especially when one mentions all three...because chances are its been used...very funny
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# posted by : 12:43 AM
: 12:43 AM << Home
