I find the hott in this one quite tasty- despite the fact that she's auditioning for her high school's version of Dazed And Confused.
 

So when does Douchebag - the movie come out? Or maybe it's Douchebag - the series?
 

You could record that song and it would be played at sleazy clubs everywhere.
 

I would like to take this Killer Queen for A Day At The Races, then A Night At The Opera. Then I'd ply her with Innuendo and be her Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy that gives her Somebody To Love. But then I would Flash her (she'd say ah-ahhhh) and then Tie Her Mother Down and groove on her Body Language and we'd Get Down, Make Love until she screams Don't Stop Me Now. Even though Fat Bottom Girls make the rockin' world go 'round.

As for the two tools in the picture, Another One Bites The Douche.

I'm a big Queen fan, so kill me.
 

So what is this? Jerry Garcia's ashes in a little bag bling? Seattle grunge wannabe in the watchcap hat looks like he just ripped a couple of mean bong hits of his buddy's pubes. As far as being a Queen fan goes, I was 8 years old when I bought News of the World. I think an LP cost somewhere around five bucks back then. Yeah, so what, I'm old.
 

So what is this? Jerry Garcia's ashes in a little bag bling? Seattle grunge wannabe in the watchcap hat looks like he just ripped a couple of mean bong hits of his buddy's pubes. As far as being a Queen fan goes, I was 8 years old when I bought News of the World. I think an LP cost somewhere around five bucks back then. Yeah, so what, I'm old.
 

dueche-boys? I say nay... more likely birkenstock wearin', wheat grass, drinkin', pacholi smellin', bong tokin' stoners. Party on Wayne!
 

mama, i just douched a bag
poured my beer on his head
now his skater friend wants me dead
mama, the night had just begun
but now i've gone thrown it all away
mamaaaa.. (doooouuuuuche)
didn't mean to make you cry
if they don't let me back into this bar tomorrow
carry on, carry on, cuz scrotes need to be handled

scotacus

let's see what you got Darksock, give us the next line
 

wannabags... pretend douche is one of the worst kinds. there are SURELY already more than enough real scrotes violating hott without fauxchoad... by all means, point, slander, judge, laugh, but please, do not emulate.
 

Spawn of former Phish groupies and Jewel's hotter cousin Amber.

Pleh.
 

These are just some doucheshredders. The one on the right has a google tan from shredding the slopes too hard and the one on the left is wearing a tech-nine chain thinking he's a gangsta shredda. Just some straight douche posers if you ask me.
 

@anon 6:15

I need to know how to get a tan on google.
This guy did it, and you know about it, let me in on that action!

Who would of thought that one could get a tan from google.

God I love the internet!
 

anon @ 6:24 --

its "teh google", dud.
 

nice work darksock.

i am also a massive Queen fan. one of the best rock bands to ever grace us with their talent. and if you disagree, i will fight you.

....and then fart in your mouth.

impressive lyrics DB1. i caught myself singing it.
 

I bet if you asked each of these individuals where they are, and what day it is, you get three unique answers. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, these three are not.
 

Is it just me or is that plinky on the blinged-out dogtag?
 

@scrotacus 4:39 PM,

Looks like Darsock has gone away...

I see a little silhouetto of a 'bag
What a douche! What a douche!
Can you see a mandana?

Thunderbolt of bling-bling
Very very frightening me!

Wanna lay her...
Can I lay her?
Wanna lay her...
Can I lay her?
Wanna lay her now, let's go.
Magnifico!

I'm not a douchebag
Nobody loves me.
He's not a douchebag
Can't afford any bling!
Spare him his life from this monstrosity!

Easy Bake is a douche
Doesn't get my vote!
Bismillah, no! He will not get my vote. Let him go!
Bismillah, no! He will not get my vote. Let him go!
Bismillah, no! He will not get my vote. Let him go!
Will not get my vote. Let me go!
Will not get my vote. Let me go!

Gonnorhea, gonnorhea, gonnorhea let me go!

Beelzebub has a douchebag put aside for me... for me... for meeeeee!
 

*guitar solo*
 

So you think you can scrote me and rub on her thigh
So you think hottie can love you and show you hair pie
Oh, xenu can't douche this to me, xenu
Just gotta douche- out, just gotta be douche outta here
 

@squatch... since the monday night football game is more boring than watching reruns of a cooking show, i checked HCwDB. and i see your creative genius. nice work brother. that was fucking hilarious.

kudos and thank you.
 

fuck fish slap!!!
 

@squatch 7:03 --

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

Damn, that was good.
 

These guys are so douchey that the patchouli they rubbed on themselves wants no part of them.

I see so much imitation silver in this picture I'm thinking they could start an aluminum foil factory.

Lord of the (Middle Finger) Rings on the right has got a little oompa-loompa going on. You don't think so? Look at the side of his face.

Oh, and anon @ 7:02 I wouldn't be caught DEAD wearing a horrible plaid jacket like that - I'm way more preppie than that - nor would I wear what looks to be like a sad little religious bling around my neck, either. I'm way not religous either.
Plus that Cal student in the pic is approx. five foot six inches at best. I'm 6'1".

But I'm glad you threw my name out there. You must be missing me.
Awwwwwww, ain't that sweet?!
 

Squatch is huffing cool whip again, then taking hits off the bong filled with iced coffee instead of water.

Or ... ... ... he found the real lost lyrics to Bohemian Rhapsody.
 

Nothing really matters...
Anyone can see.
Nothing really matters
To me.
 

And @anon 7:28 --

Your continued reminders are like the sweet, lilting songs of the boobie birds high in the wanker trees that offer us support and encouragement for our work here.

Thank you, good friend.
 

Thanks pfah, il, plinky.

Looks like my 'ex-roomie Andrew' is posting pics of me on HCwDB now!

Pfft. Jealous little fucker. I caught him with an ether-soaked rag one night, trying to sneak into my room. He had a mad gleam in his eye, and I knew my butt was toast if he got me with that ether rag...

So I distracted him with something shiny. Kinda like The Telltale Heart. But instead of bashing his head in and sticking him under the floorboards, I hogtied him and put him in the street with a cigar hanging out of his ass with a big magic marker smile and moustache. Like an ass-faced Groucho Marx.

Now I guess it's payback time, eh? Oh well. Pussy L. McLover warned me, karma's a bitch.
 

Yeah squatch I was reading through that thread. Didn't know til now that's you in the pic.

But you can read my comments in that thread. I knew you were a wild man. Atta boy!
 

Hey, I think its funny that you guys stand so tall and harsh on people when they come at you with "you all are GAY, blah blah blah"
But it looks like someone is the product of the HCwDB environment and has his picture posted, and what does he do,
He's calling people GAY.

Funny how this all works!

You guys really are not that great and special.

remember, we laugh at you, not with you.
 

WTF? Tell me this is some Halloween ish...or this had better not be how they party in the Northwest.

Oregon Love baybay!
 

@proudgayman...actually i am quite great AND special. and since it takes all kinds to fill up the freeway, we should all laugh at each other. don't you think? the difference is, when i am laughing, i am pointing my finger directly at the person i am laughing at. which makes it funnier since when you are pointing a finger at someone, there are 3 fingers pointing back at you.

fucking hell. it's the internet, not actual life.

relax. have a beer.
 

well put.

But at times we check here because it seems like you all are against outright biggotry, and gay bashing.
Am I wrong?
But then the biggotry happens by your own people, when your own are the object of "laughter".
 

@proudgayman.... i don't give two shits if you are gay. honestly. if you are a decent person, you are cool with me. but posting a picture here (or anywhere) to get back at someone is fucked up and worthy of ridicule. that's my point.

gaybashing is wrong. but is calling someone 'gay' for being 'out of the norm' really wrong? i call myself 'retarded' all the time, but i am not actually retarded. should short people call themselves 'midgets' when they aren't actually 'little people'?

we need to get over ourselves. it's all just in fun. and if it's not, and you actually mean physical harm to someone, then you are an asshole and need medical/emotional attention.

fuck this. i am going back to watching a boring-ass monday night football game.
 

Who's talking about physical harm here?
Did I miss something?
 

Who's talking about physical harm here?
Did I miss something?
 

@proudgayman --

You did.

Sorry.

And remember, you can be anyone you want to be on teh interwebs.
 

ummm sorry, I never mentioned physicaly harming anyone.

I think it was simply a matter of frustration and a lack of words to express a point, by pfah.


But back to the basic point. You guys do a good job of making yourselfs look bad.
Atleast be consistent with your arguments, choice of words, and childish internet games.
 

@proudgayman....ok. the terribly boring football game is over. back to coddling your overly-sensitive self.

i'll take back the tazer comment, ok?

does that make you feel better?

i don't mean anyone any physical harm. just mental harm. and if you can't handle a direct attack to your psyche, then you are weak and in need of some self-awareness classes. ...or...better parenting....but i guess it's too late for that.
 

But didnt you say when you point fingers you have 3 pointing back at you?
And for a while, Ive enjoyed the comic relief I get from looking at this site.
But it makes me think alot of how people who do the heckeling and are the ones doing the close minded behavior,
They are really the ones who need help.
Sort of that twisted psycho-babble diagnosis. And Im no shrink, so I wont get into that, but that theory does seem accurate alot of the times.

Im not overly sensitive.

I just noticed that lately when you guys are challenged, or someone posts a picture of one of you guys on here, you all become defensive, harsh, childish and dont really practice what you ALL preach.
 

@proudgayman....well, i'll tell you what my gay friend...

if you no longer like the comic relief you have enjoyed from this website........fuck off. it's a free country. and it's not an anti-gay thing. i have gay friends. they are always welcome in our house. i would take a bullet for them. they are awesome. you....are not. or, don't seem to be from what you've voiced here tonight. you sound like a whiner.

and i hate whiners. not because you like kissing boys.....because you are a whiner.

i have 3 fingers pointing back at me 24-7. it makes me who i am.

you are overly sensitive. listen to yourself.

also...what we preach isn't meant to become a mantra. it's all in good fun. get the fuck over yourself.

additionally, the pittsburgh steelers suck.

and i am not even sorry.
 

hey pfah, when that closet gets too stuffy, come on out
 

naw man....i'm good here.

thanks though.

and always remember: your shoes should match your belt.





dick.
 

And @anon 9:22 (may I call you "Sybil"?) --

The closet only gets stuffy when the door is nailed shut.

Would you like to try?

Trust me, pfah's good. Every seen the missus?
 

fuck fish slap!!!
 

@squatch

you nailed it bro,, you are the Bernie Taupin of Bag choked lyrics.

well done

Scrotacus
 

You people think you're real cool and tough when it comes to making fun of other people but you're not so funny when standing in front of the mirror and have to look at yourself wearing cargo pants and those cargo pants are too tight so then you try on your LEVI's but they're too big and we're laughing at you not with you and HAHAHA bitches why don't you-all post your pictures here and we'll see how you like being made fun of and nanny nanny boo boo stick your head in doo doo ....
 

Damn, Squatch, that was the best thing I've seen on the internet since boobs. Even your guitar solo rocked. I ain't touching that, scrotacus; you got your money's worth.

Umm, proudgayman, you need to change your handle to "whiner". You're embarrassing cool gays everywhere. And not like Chris Crocker did.

How friggin dare anyone out there make fun of Pfah after all he has been through. LEAVE him ALONE! You are lucky he even writes for you, BASTARD! HE’S A HUMAN! Leave Pfah alone. LEAVE PFAH ALOOOONE! YOU BASTARD! Leave Pfah Alone Please…. Leave Pfah alone…right now…. I mean it.

Anyone that has a problem with him you deal with me, beacuse he is not well right now.

leave him alone
 

uh.... thanks darksock? i think thanks is in order, but i am not sure. imagining chris crocker saying my name kinda made me queezy.

i need more coffee.
 

Chris Crocker is awesome. He needs to take over vocal duties for Metallica. Or at least Ozzy. Yeah, with the running mascara that would be a better gig.
 

@ proudgayman

why can't you just be proudman?
 

queers are nasty
 

STONED
 

they both have Jerry Garcia in a pouch. duuuuuuude.........
 

Proudgayman is accurate, and proves a good point.
But youre still gay, and thats gross.

Gay wad!