simply unreal... yet painfully real... at the same time...
 

This is why they don't allow alcohol at PTA meetings.
 

there are too many things wrong with this picture, but the one that jumps out is the fact he is proudly displaying his bag lite beer, bag lite made with rocky mountain doucheyness, from mountain springs to choads everywhere
 

Hey douche-knuckle! 1989 called. They want you to dance with the devil in the pale douche light.
 

the blonde's cute, but no 'hottie' per se...seems to me the cute lil fella on the right is angling for that honor...
 

Lots of celebrity 'bags in da house. James Carville 'bag and Toby McGuire 'bag flanked by wild-eyed Samantha Brown and Courteney Cox 'baguettes. All backed up by Ed Begley, Jr. 'bag. Everybody looks like somebody.

the douchess of kunt
 

Which fool is Bat Simpson's girlfriend anyway...VERY mildly attractive not-so-hott on the left, or Phil Collins after Rogaine on the right? And is that Egon from the animated Ghostbusters series behind Phil?! Maybe he'll bust open a containment unit and trap these losers in the ether while Mrs. Bluestripes finds the Choadkeeper.
 

Holy Crapola! I know that guy: It's the Bat Man! Seriously, he's a regular downtown and on SoCo here in Austin. We trail only very slightly behind San Fran and NYC in per capita freakdom.

I'm 100% positive this guy is as queer as a 3-dollar bill. Believe it or not, this is actually one of his more tame outfits.
 

Ok it's cartoon ballon time:
(starting from left to right)

Martha Stewart's daughter hottie: "jesus fucking christ I can wait to submit this to HCWD.com so me and all my friends can vote this guy for douchebag of the month ... or possibly the YEAR!!!!"

bleached Mario Van Peebles slash soft-on-top spike: (how he thinks to himself mimicks how he actually speaks): "duhhhh-uhhhh. uhhhhhhh. Penis. Uhhhhhh, batsignal .... I want pancakes house now... tea bag on my nose ....duhhhhhhhh-uhhhhhh. .. (drools) ... I'm so frickin' hot."

wannabe 'Aprrentice' star: "Geeez, hope my boss at the brokerage doesn't see this pic. Then he'll KNOW I'm a flamer. Love what Dejesus did with his hair, spiking it up and all. Wish I could do that."

Ed Begley Jr. (in background to the right): "F-ing A man, look at all this GREEN PUSSY. I'm gonna be mowin'g tonight!"
 

'Bag on the right looks vaguely like Michael Keaton. Ironic.

Is that what Douche Wayne looks like without his breastplate? His torso looks like cooling lava. And what the hell is up with that shirt?

Also note the covert 'bag hand gesture to the left.

This picture's got many levels of wrong.
 

Poor Harry Hamlin 'bag, that campaign to be the next "porn batman" backfired terribly, and being married to Lisa "cougar lips" Rinna can't help things either.


--- i have spoken from the TEMPLE OF THE DOUCHE
 

I do believe she is hunting in unknown territory. Shady Acres retirement community. His hairline is receding so fast his ass is starting to become acutely aware of the term collateral damage.

And I'm going to hell for this but it's nice to see Micheal J hasn't spilled any of his bud on his shirt.

So grotesque is this specter that he he even proudly displays his love of batman on his belt as well. Or is it robin? There certainly isn't anything ambiguous about this half of the famous duo.
 

I can't even form words.
This might be the Douchepocalypse.
 

Someone's giving his Robin little bat ears.
 

This looks like the offspring of Billy Idol and Elton John. Gross.

Dude on right reminds me of Ricky.
 

BLAM! KRAANG! DOOOOOOOOOOOSH!
 

He looks as though he would enjoy a Louisville Slugger in the Bat Cave, dry.

This would have been a great Wednesday limrick
 

ahem,
excuse me,
but could you tell me where the hot chick is?
all I see is a bitter disappointment to a family and his cat-loving, soon-to-reach-spinster-status sister.
 

belt buckle matches ridiculous chest tattoo.

it's.........it's...just too much for words.

and there's a bunch of random hands signals happening in this picture.
 

Lemon Meringue Bat Douche's tit is bigger than hers...

Dude on the right and his girl are obviously trying not to lose their shit and crack up until after their accomplice manages to snap the picture.

And look at striped blue dress woman doing the rabbit ears in the background; possibly the most bat shit crazy woman yet. That's an expression usually reserved for plunging butcher knives into spurting jagged sternum wounds.

The surviving member of The Strawberry Alarm Clock called; he wants his 60's sunglasses back.
 

He's not Batman.

He's not even Azreal.

If you know what that means, then you know what I mean.
 

He needs to be assimilated back in to soylent orange and fed to the nearest bat community.
 

look! there in the background!

nice to see that Ed Begley Jr. is still out on the party scene.
 

Is that Ricky on the right?
 

@ Clementine

You're absolutely right...not even Azreal. He's a broke-ass Nightwing if anything. He's like the Blankman of Batmans.

-Honus Bagner
 

I think I liked the World Weekly News' Bat Boy better. He didn't make me want to drive into the neighbor's house party at 90 mph... after first side-swiping Begley's double-parked Prius.
 

He's gayer than the Scoutmaster from the Simpsons.
 

Ya gotta give the tattoo artist credit, though... he kept a fairly steady hand while laughing his ass off.

And do think Bat Boy and the Powder Puff Pirate down below might like to get together for some cartoon canoodlin'?
 

@Honus

Please don't dis the Wingnut!

Any man who can make a parapalegic Barbara Gordon feel like All Woman again is Bloody Tops with me.

This choad is the ill-gotten lovechild of E. Nigma and Dr. Crane who became a Frank Miller fanboy to cheese off his dads.
 

I told you guys comic books were gay.
 

What a mighty fall by Harry Hamlin.
From Clash of the Titans to this..
Sad....very sad.

Marcos Douchebagdatis
 

oh god i almost choked on my eggos. i dont know what's funnier, the bat tattoo (that i'd like to say he'd regret later in life... but it already is later in life), or the spiked hair with receding hairline. brutal.
 

Although Martha Stewart Aniston doesn't really qualify as hot, the fact that Flea's brother's breasticle was so tempting that Gay Ricky sucked his lips off on it made DB1 include the pic.
 

Before I find out and kill whoever put this up (but thank him too for introducing me to this hilarious site), I have to comment. Um, yeah, his douchebagness definitely outweighs my hotness, agreed. I only wish you all could see the FULL outfit to truly appreciate his attention to detail. He wears black riding boots with obscenely tight 501’s tucked into them. Seriously, Austin is a great place… home to the new Bachelor and Batman. Now do you understand why we don’t wear more form-fitting dresses around here??
 

Jeezus, just when I though shit couldn't get any worse!
I hope to hell this is a Halloween costume. I'm not sure I can take anymore...
 

I just want to know what he was thinking when he matched up his belt buckle to his lame tat.

Seriously. What the hell?
 

This guy is actually doing a tv series in the vein of smallville, but based on the batmen characters. the guy to his right is robin, played by matt keaton, michael keaton's younger, less talented brother. lois lane on the left is played by katrina thompson, lea thompson's younger, hotter sister.

the show takes a more modern approach on the classic super hero tail. its based in north jersey and its all about batman and robin's adventures at various bars and night clubs, and their various battles with other notorious club personalities, like the riddler, played by ed begley, jr.

this looks like a promising show. keep an eye out for episode 3, when batman recieves his bat-mobile, an IROC.
 

insulting coors light is going too far. are you a fat hippie with a dirty beard that drinks only Dark Beers and plans fun trips to Vermont? have fun with your Petes wiked, wavy gravy.
 

Anonymous=You dont have to be a hippie to enjoy the taste of real beer. If you ejoy your white trash frat soda, aka coors light so be it. You like crap beer. I am no hippie, I am enjoying an Alesmith IPA as we speak.


Pete's wicked is awful too.
 

Hi guys this is Ed. You put up a picture of my boyfriend and I am not happy about it. Please take the pic down and refrain from making comments. You are just jealouse that i get to sperm on his Bat Tat. I mean seriously folks, I am an old fart bag with a wrinkly scrotum for a face, this guy is as good as I can get. He is a real power bottom. I will see you all on Weds for some Limericks.

Ed
 

@ Clementine:

He's not good enough to be DarkWing Duck
 

Someone (anonymous) is getting insulted because someone else cracked on Coors Light??
In the immortal words of Tim Duncan, "That's retarded."

Coor's light is what you drink when you NEED to make yourself piss.
 

HOS nominee with one posting. Stellar.
 

This needs to be instantly moved a little to the left, straight into ye olde Hall o' Scrote.
!. Hair as weaponry
2. bottle of coor's light
3. Holy Douche darn dangit batman I think I found your gay Half brother.
4. You're fucking balding batbag! Hang up the club clothes. For good.
 

Using "Coors Light" and "Piss" in the same sentence is redundant.
 

Holy Douchehole, Batbag!
 

darksock: true dat. my bad. If you'll excuse me now I have to go take a coors light ...
 

Who has Halloween parties two weeks in advance?

Wait... what?

I bet he uses "Bat Cave" the same as "Bone Zone."
 

Who be rippin on da coors light? Why would I drink a nice Trappist ale or Caramel Porter When I coud have the taste of the Rockies....Rocky Mountain Stream runoff that is.
 

SUPER DOUCHE!!
 

That tattoo looks horrible. He should be covering it up not showing it off! WTF is wrong with people?!?!
 

That guys such a douche, he needs to drink Coors with the mountains that get blue so he knows when his beer is cold and bats are hard.
 

My god, the douche in middle makes the Gator look masculine. The guy on the right looks like Rickeys retarded brother. Photos like this make me realize that abortion is necessary sometimes.
 

Sweet Jesus.

I'd like to trap Capn Jack Spackle and Batman in a giant net full of nukes and launch them into planetary orbit.

I'm anticipating quite a showdown between these two at the weekly.
 

that is billy idol-bag at its finest
 

I think I've seen this dude roaming Austin, too. He's better than Leslie, the guy that wears thongs and mini-skirts while walking up and down 6th, but not by a whole lot.

Piss Light sucks, Vermont is pretty cool, hippies smell bad.
 

crystal meth is a heeluva drug
 

Do you think the guy in the middle bashed out the guy on the right's teeth? This way there would be no chaffing during oral?
 

My eyes, my fucking eyes!!!!!!!
 

THIS IS THE BEST PICTURE I'VE SEEN IN YEARS. And by best I mean most disturbing. Why would a grown man match his belt to his horrendous batman tattoo? And how did he get that poor girl to pose with him?
 

@ Clementine - Azrael? He wishes he was that mainstream. I'm getting a decidedly Ranxerox vibe off this retro Frankenbag.

Despite the cornucopia of dickheadery going on in this pic, I find myself fixating on the arm on the warmie's shoulder. Is that a forearm coming out of it and if so, WHUTHUFUGG is going on???? If that's Batbag's arm he can't be bending it so that means that he's got a tiny hobbit gimp arm with creepy ET sausage fingers that dangles to about the top of his ultility belt. If it's not his, then Dimply McLeprechaun is doublefisting his pee water with his one huge Mr. Fantastic gibbon arm. Either way, I'm thinking the circus is in town.
 

If only I could find a chick with such tightly-pursed lips as rightie, a skull fuck would be out of this world!
 

H.O.S. Now.
 

Darksock 12:24

Agreed about Coors Light; it should be put back in the horse.
 

1. Bat Tat
2. MOOBS
3. Susan Powter Hair
4. Coors Light
5. Bat Belt (did anyone notice that sweet buckle?!)

Good God.

I just...I just don't have the words for this...the vomit riseth creepily into my mouth.
 

I. Need. Eye. Bleach.

Now.
 

It looks like Billy Idol started balding, and then trying to be like the Gator, and then bought the most douche like sunglasses i've seen since the fly. Mega Douche....A few more pics and hes a first ballot hall of scroter
 

It looks like Billy Idol started balding, and then trying to be like the Gator, and then bought the most douche like sunglasses i've seen since the fly. Mega Douche....A few more pics and hes a first ballot hall of scroter
 

It looks like Billy Idol started balding, and then trying to be like the Gator, and then bought the most douche like sunglasses i've seen since the fly. Mega Douche....A few more pics and hes a first ballot hall of scroter
 

@il choadrino - I'd give you some of mine, but I used it all up when "Tatman" showed up...

*blurp*
*glargh*
 

LMAO!! [shakes head]
 

If the douche has bigger tits than the hottie, is she really a hottie? A very important existential question.
 

As of today I have taken my eyes of my skull...

To douche of hazzard, the answer is: (1)^k)+((2)^k)+......+((n-1)^k)+((n)^k) = ((n+1)^k)



Hans "eyeless" Von Douchepants
 

That's far over a bag, that's a Freak!
 

O-M-G! I want a bat tat! This guy is the coolest mother fucker in the world! He's also wearing a bat belt to boot! Sweet jesus how awesome!

But...wait a minute...I didn't know German Uber-douches knew about Batman.

Oh well.
 

This guy COULD be H.O.S. material if the chick in the pic was hotter. We need more of the Clown Prince of Choad.

-Honus Bagner
 

The best part of this one is the Sub-Scroate or ward who is unwittingly the butt of another more traditional joke... Ahhhh the bunny ears! Love that ol' chestnut!
 

Clearly bag-hunting. Somehow I knew this was Austin, probably all the light beers and girl-next-door hotts. HcWDB is a bit irrelevant to Austin since there is enough for everyone. And by enough I mean light beer and hot girls. Cold climate = dark beer, 95 degrees = light beer or cocktails if it's LA. Actually, now that I think about it, Miller lite or Bud light are still way less douchey than Coors.
 

Can I ask why, if you went to the trouble of getting a Batman tattoo, would you have it colored red? It's like he's some sort of third world Batman rip-off.

Boo, poorly thought out tattoos. Hooray, mockery!
 

wow. what an assmonkey.

i also love the demon in the background mocking assmonkey's friend.
 

@ Batou

Next time you see him in Austin let him know he's my hero.

I've never seen a man who so closely resembles how i wanted to look when i was 5.
 

Honus:

I disagree; I think she's perty damn cute; sort of a Helen Hunt thing going on. Standing next to this freak would knock a couple of points off of even Jessica Alba. Who used to live in Biloxi at one time, mind you. Yeah, the 'Sock could've had her. If I'd met her, had money, was 10 years younger and looked like Brad Pitt at the time. Yeah, I coulda tapped that.
 

WTF??
 

Oh my god! I saw this guy walking around with the same white jeans, shirtless, with cowboy boots at Austin City Limits. Mind you, it was about 98 degrees. What you guys don't see are the batman tattoos that he has on both arms. He looks even stranger in person.
 

Oh yea - his cowboy boots had bat symbols on them.
 

"Hey Little Sister what have you done..." You never told me you knew Billy Idol! but NO White Wedding...

Laughed at the 'no boobs' comment...hello??? big boobs run in our family!
 

i bet the chick has long nipples
 

I saw him walking through ACL in all black leather two years ago. I was workin the Med tent and praying to the god of skinny punks that the wind...wait...that he didn't have any medical conditions and that he drank plenty of water so that he didn't dehydrate in his leather Batsuit. I dunno if I could have handled getting vitals on that guy without cracking up.

Although, something tells me the Batmobile and/or Alfred would have just come and picked him up if he went down.
 

That poor girl!!! those two undiluted douchebags deserve each other!!
 

Holy freaking tattoo batfan. I've seen this guy all over Austin. He's got another tatoo on his arm of the dark knight and black boots that match the belt, which he tucks his pants into so that all can see his doucheness.