Saturday, July 21, 2007
The Paradox
Okay, enough with my Bollywood fetish, lets get back to the good stuff.
Here's your classic stage-4 all-American douchebag. Apple Pie is to America what Douchechoad here is to Douchebaggery.
You get all the markers of classic 'bag/hott wrongness. Creepy tats. Simultaneous 'bag hand gesture and beer hold. The smug douche-face of ownership. And, of course, the 'bag headbutt into Creamed Corn Hottie.
She is shiny cheeked perfection. That dark sultry ambiguously Spanish hot tamale hott. Healthy bosoms that promise to feed and nourish all of humanity. Large swells that whisper poems of water trickling over rocks, metaphors of hope, peace and a better tomorrow. I would bury myself betwixt their health and dream of flowerpots and sugarplum pancakes.
She is sexpot. He is choad.
It is the perfect HCwDB weekend pic to fire all of us up and keep us going. It's like a shot of spiritual Red Bull. You rage. You desire. You rage some more.
The paradox is life itself. I don't know what that means, but it sounds good. And the DB1 is hungover.
Comments:
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Nice neck tat, shaved Arab douche...that should set the glass career ceiling somewhere around stock-boy...why don't you give your sister back her glasses, earring and pants and then let your boyfriend satisfy the Fatwah he placed on your colon with the Jihad in his pants. Jean Tripplehorn is not for you, Mustapha......Allah Douchebar! blah-lah-lah-lah-lah!!!
evidently, he stole his belt from Kirstie Alley's closet. and it's a shame about the melanoma on his ear. he should get that checked out pronto. eh, he's a total scrote. enough about him.
the girl's pretty. but i'm a bit put-off by how wide her eyes are. there's no sneakin' up behind this HC.
the girl's pretty. but i'm a bit put-off by how wide her eyes are. there's no sneakin' up behind this HC.
# posted by 
: 12:57 PM
: 12:57 PM
Yeah, remember when having your belt too long and letting the end hand down was cool?
Neither do i.
Of course, there's something poetic about this Palestinian douchebag tatooing himself "The Outlaw" in the only fuckin' country his people would be allowed to do so without fear of defiming Allah.
I am sorry to say however, this hottie provides us with none of the usual vigor-of-the-crotch that has come to be a hallmark of this site nor is she very bleethed. I look at her and think "Good thing there's still porn for me to watch."
Neither do i.
Of course, there's something poetic about this Palestinian douchebag tatooing himself "The Outlaw" in the only fuckin' country his people would be allowed to do so without fear of defiming Allah.
I am sorry to say however, this hottie provides us with none of the usual vigor-of-the-crotch that has come to be a hallmark of this site nor is she very bleethed. I look at her and think "Good thing there's still porn for me to watch."
# posted by : 1:35 PM
: 1:35 PM
Overload on skulls. Check.
Annoying trendy sunglasses worn when unnecessary and in the shade. Check.
Cheesy tattoos, which eventually won't be so "bad ass" when they're on the neck, hands and arms of a 45 year old. Check.
Extended holes in the lobes and the jewellery to showcase it. Check.
And the ever present delusional notion of entitlement all of this 'bags seem to have. Check.
Maybe these guys feel they're worthy and deserving of hot chicks because they spend so much time trying to make themselves look effortlessly cool(like assholes)? So, with that logic does that mean walking around like you're deserving will attract the honeys?
Annoying trendy sunglasses worn when unnecessary and in the shade. Check.
Cheesy tattoos, which eventually won't be so "bad ass" when they're on the neck, hands and arms of a 45 year old. Check.
Extended holes in the lobes and the jewellery to showcase it. Check.
And the ever present delusional notion of entitlement all of this 'bags seem to have. Check.
Maybe these guys feel they're worthy and deserving of hot chicks because they spend so much time trying to make themselves look effortlessly cool(like assholes)? So, with that logic does that mean walking around like you're deserving will attract the honeys?
# posted by : 1:47 PM
: 1:47 PM
It is the bag that motivates us to achieve what they have through honorable means, like a sexual samurai. It is they who provide life through beer filled seduction. What we don't ever want to be, and want to be at the same time. It is indeed the essence of life.
Gazing upon his neck tats prompts a desire to "cut along dotted line". O.J. style.
# posted by : 2:03 PM
: 2:03 PM
This guy looks like an uberdouched Johnny Knoxville impersonator. Why ANYONE would aspire to be the leader of the literal "Jackass" crew is beyond me. Although I do laugh my ASS off at their antics when I'm not PUKING my guts out at their antics.
Chicka is very cute, not bleethed, and rather wholesome looking. Strikes me as being the type who can't say no when approached by the obviously handicapped who are asking for a photo op.
Chicka is very cute, not bleethed, and rather wholesome looking. Strikes me as being the type who can't say no when approached by the obviously handicapped who are asking for a photo op.
I don't get what the WALTUO tattoo is? Is it Farsi for "I'm a Douchebag"?
On another note, just went to a new Super WalMart in town (I know, I rule) and there were 2 Laker Girls there signing calendars. was so tempted to try and pull a douche pose with them. But I haven't spent time practicing in front of the mirror like these choadlers do so I chickened out.
Frodo Douchebaggins
On another note, just went to a new Super WalMart in town (I know, I rule) and there were 2 Laker Girls there signing calendars. was so tempted to try and pull a douche pose with them. But I haven't spent time practicing in front of the mirror like these choadlers do so I chickened out.
Frodo Douchebaggins
# posted by : 3:49 PM
: 3:49 PM
A 45 year old with these tats? Wiat until they turn 60 and look like they got into a fight with a fifth grader and some magic markers. Only it won't wash off. (Hence the reason I have zero tattoos)
When I'm an old biddy with 44 longs instead of 34 C's, I don't want any part of that.
When I'm an old biddy with 44 longs instead of 34 C's, I don't want any part of that.
Consider yourself lucky, MJ. Some of us aren't even to the "biddy age" yet, and we ALREADY have those problems. It's tragic.....I'm saving up for my boob lift when I turn 40! ;)
What is transparent and lies in the gutter? This douchebag with the shit kicked out of him.
Someone needs to speedfuck this dildonic rectum oyster in his left ear with an unsharpened dry no. 2 pencil. Eraser end, of course; no need to be brutal about it.
Creamed Corn Hottie? meh...
Someone needs to speedfuck this dildonic rectum oyster in his left ear with an unsharpened dry no. 2 pencil. Eraser end, of course; no need to be brutal about it.
Creamed Corn Hottie? meh...
# posted by : 5:14 PM
: 5:14 PM
The flag in the back-ground sits atop the American embassy in Pakistan. This terrorist disguised himself as a douchebag in order to woo the comely, buxom daughter of a mid-level embassy staffer, into taking him home to America with her.
I have to say, "Nice job Muhammed. If the look you were going for was douchebag...you nailed it."
The good thing is, once he dips his RPG in her remote cave, he'll forget all about his mission to slay the infidels, open a Motel-6 franchize, and live happily in America as a douchebag.
I have to say, "Nice job Muhammed. If the look you were going for was douchebag...you nailed it."
The good thing is, once he dips his RPG in her remote cave, he'll forget all about his mission to slay the infidels, open a Motel-6 franchize, and live happily in America as a douchebag.
# posted by : 5:15 PM
: 5:15 PM
I'm sorry. I wanted to comment on his obvious doucheosity, but I was distracted by his HAND BRAND!! Holy hell, man! Unless that was put there against his will by his cellmate while he was in Lebanese prison for being an international douchebag. Oh, and the fact that the brand (shudder) and tattoos are highly visible and in Arabic? Brilliant. I can't imagine what joys await you as you travel through security checks all over the world. May the anal probes of 1,000 airport guards violate you until your tattoos fade.
This girl, as Pfah astutely pointed out, has the eyes of a gazelle. And by eyes of a gazelle, i mean her eyes are farther apart than Brandy's.
But her general rotundness about the chestal region more than compensates.
I hope the tattoo on Baghdad Bag's neck is farsi for "cut here."
But her general rotundness about the chestal region more than compensates.
I hope the tattoo on Baghdad Bag's neck is farsi for "cut here."
Tattoos on douchebags are actually spiritual messages from Xenu regarding who should be infected with Grieco virus. Each tattoo represents a nubile young woman who happened to be in the wrong place, wrong time. I am still drunk.
We're really douchin' all over the world with this arabian doucheprincess. "I hhhhave hhhheard eet ees Kool to hhhhhave, eh how you say, eh...the douchey hhhhtattoos." I mean this fag who I could easily beat the shit out of when I was 8 has "outlaw" tattooed to his forearm??!! "Outlaw"....gee whiz buddy I better be in awe of you with all the law breaking you must do. What did you run a red light when you saw a hot topic store on the side of the road. And let's not forget with all his neck and hand tattoos that he also has the classic tribal armband tattoo as a douchey foundation tat.
A skull and crossbones painted on shirt that I even think is a fucking sweater. What is he Paris Hilton's chihuahua? And he's wearing her glasses.
I think he is holding a beer (corona is actually piss water) AND a cell phone.
A skull and crossbones painted on shirt that I even think is a fucking sweater. What is he Paris Hilton's chihuahua? And he's wearing her glasses.
I think he is holding a beer (corona is actually piss water) AND a cell phone.
# posted by : 11:54 PM
: 11:54 PM
Hottie strikes me as more of a milf or well preserved younger friend of your mom's who'd let you sip from her mixed drinks at the neighborhood Xmas party.
Abdin Abdulchoad is Captain Obvious. You could probably lure him away from Milfy with the promise of Axe spray and some coupons to Olive garden.
Abdin Abdulchoad is Captain Obvious. You could probably lure him away from Milfy with the promise of Axe spray and some coupons to Olive garden.
# posted by : 12:56 AM
: 12:56 AM
The forearm tat spells "OUTLAW". I appreciate his honesty as I am sure this creep runs afoul of proper social conventions of legal behavior on a very regular basis. Now if he would just get other appropriate adjectives emblazened subcutaneously. Things like "piece of shit", "malodorous", "evil fuck", "stupid", "idiot", "low I.Q.", etc., etc.
# posted by : 9:55 AM
: 9:55 AM
Hmm...I REALLY think Frodo Douchbaggins was being SARCASTIC about the stupid WALTUO tattoo.
Really,I don't think he/she is that stupid.
Really,I don't think he/she is that stupid.
# posted by : 10:35 AM
: 10:35 AM
I wish good luck to this guy when he'll get a call for a serious job interview..
# posted by : 11:20 AM
: 11:20 AM
can you really be an "outlaw" with a size med. youth tee and some wanna-be D&G swap-meet frank poncherello shades?
# posted by : 2:01 PM
: 2:01 PM
A true outlaw would know that tatoos only make your more recognizable by the fuzz.
TATOOS ARE DISGUSTING
TATOOS ARE DISGUSTING
# posted by : 9:35 PM
: 9:35 PM
Didn't we see this guy last month in a picture? The Farsi on the neck looks familiar. Oh, sorry I'm thinking of the guy down at the Sunoco Station.
if this douche ever went to la, he would be shot, and rightly so…
how has no one noticed that this guy blatantly ripped off tupac's forearm tattoos?!?!?
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how has no one noticed that this guy blatantly ripped off tupac's forearm tattoos?!?!?
# posted by : 11:33 AM
: 11:33 AM << Home
