oh man! I was eating!
 

1. This guy is a fag
2. I was about to go to lunch but now i think I'd rather pour batery acid in my eyes.
3. It would be pretty funny if in a second pic HC would lift her arm revealing a full pit bush.
4. I'm gonna go vomit now
 

He tells her he shaved his pits. She disbelieves. He shows her. She looks in to verify. He closes his arm around her head. The mutation spreads.

I would like to see more beautiful girls wear dresses or skirts. There was a time when what was left to the imagination made a chick more hot.

That's also why I started watching softcore movies again. I've exhausted my ability to be turned on by porno, I'm back to those Joe D'Amato Emanuelle flicks on Skinemax.
 

WOW... what a fkn oily ass scrote. I can't help but think of fried chicken and greasy pizza run off when I look at this priss'bag.

"Look mom, I can shave under my arms and no get razor burn!"
 

I just threw up in my mouth. Worst ever!

I hope this guy writes in to have his photo removed.

-X
 

Why couldn't Michael Vick have started a douche fighting ring instead?
 

Douchebag out, I just peed myself.
 

This pisses me off beyond any image from this site to ever assault my cornea; it makes me want to run across a solid field of white kittens in golf shoes. The neck bling, the scrote tat, frosted hair, etc. are bad enough, but when you frost this shit cake with the "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful" brooding stare and the SHAVED MAN PITS it just makes my testicles want to descend into my abdomen and gnaw through my colon string.

Go ahead and get the operation, you inverted penis.

I'm going out back to hammer dry wood splinters into my sinus cavity with a shoe until I feel better.
 

Waxed brows and waxed pits = douche! (s)He looks like a clay sculpture I made way back in eighth grade.

Why do I get the feeling he smells like women's perfume???
 

I think I'm gonna hurl.

He thinks he's a model with that smoldering, serious expression...and by model I mean last year's model of douchebag.
 

Don't raise your arm unless you're sure you're a douchebag. Of course, this guy looks like he's been hitting the bottle for awhile after finding out exactly what a douchebag he is.

I'd love to use my various appendages to connect the dots on Hott's dress.

- Ryan Seadouche
 

His black beater and camo pants take the militaristic place of the dog tags. This fucker is flashing his muscle and making a straight face, like it's natural for all pictures. Guile Douche from street fighter, you need a hadouken right up the ass.
 

What the hell is happening to this country? Are we going through another one of those cycles like androgyny of the 80's or makeup wearing hair bands of the early 90's? Don't any of you people have fathers or older brothers? Why aren't they kicking the living shit out of you for looking like that?
And to the ladies who are with confused douches like this: is an effeminate man REALLY what you want? Sure, his skin is as smooth as yours, you can share hair products, and you can go shoe shopping together, but I do hope you realize that when you aren't around, he tries on your underwear.
Look. Trying to have it both ways is going to end badly. You are reaaaaally not going to like it when he leaves you for his personal trainer. You want feminine? No problem! Chow some box! I'm not saying you have to do it full time or anything, but when you get those urges to share feelings while touching, make sure it is with another woman. Everybody's doing it. Hell, even the Catholic church recently released a statement saying that lesbians are the exception to the Homesexuality is a Sin rule.

Sigh. Tom Selleck is probably rolling over in his grave right now.
 

natalie portman here is blowing it.
I wonder how stupid his arm band tat will look when that dude is 80 years old and looks like an old grape. I bet his grand kids will laugh at his sorry ass for when he explains why he got sucha a beat tat.
 

She is VERY pretty in a fresh-faced way, and her dress is adorable, and I would touch her with a pole if I had one. ;)
He is very scrotey looking in comparison. Not only do those eyebrows look waxed, they look like they've been DARKENED with eyebrow pencil! Christ almighty. Dude, men are SUPPOSED to have hairy armpits......and non-coiffed eyebrows!!!! Here are the choices for what I think happened with this "guy": 1) He's gay (not that there's anything wrong with that, especially if it's two chicks), or 2) he's a METROsexual. Personally, I can't stand metros; men who overgroom themselves to the point of bordering on "feminine" or just gay men that haven't come out of the closet, or can't admit to themselves that they're fruity. Again, there is nothing wrong with it.....but dude! If there's actually a chance that you're 100% hetero, stop pruning yourself like a drag queen.
 

Looks like the cross mutation between between Mark McGrath and Matt Dillon went a bit askew.

What the hell was he thinking when he decided to show us his arm pit? Yep, you sure are cool - well in comparison to Paul Simon (senator that is).
 

she looks too good for him........ He does not look like he gets to tap that on the regular. i hope to the gods i'm right.
 

His arm resembles a wad of unformed pizza dough. Where's my rolling pin?
 

Whaa ... thn.... grrrnnn ... grzzzttt .... arrggghhhhhh.

The vein is poking out of my forehead in a way that tells me I need to get my blood pressure taken soon. I can't help but sound like Lewis Black in another indignant rant. He needs to be tied up in a sack and dropped off a bridge, just after being beat with baseball bats, peed on, and having a bunch of pissed off rattlesnakes tossed in for good measure. There is no excuse for this.
 

This picture is responsible for my first post on this site. What's he doing? Trying to wipe some of the excess gel off?
 

He looks like a "gayer" oscar de la hoya. Maybe he has cooties on his back and he's trying to scratch them. That is the only logical explanation for that pose.
 

Sadly, this isn't the first shaved-pit male on this site...check the guy on the right in this pic:

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/2006/04/yayyyy-were-douchebags.html
 

HOS worthy?

-X
 

this is the most offensive picture i've seen posted here.

if i was his armpit, i'd want the damn thing taken down.
 

YO! WOOOO! WOOOO! WAIVE YA HANDS IN DA AAAAIIIIRRRR!!! DOUCHE IT LIKE YA JUST DON'T CAAARRE!!!!
 

I shaved my pits once. It was summer and I discovered a fossilized wad of Speed Stick caked in there along with, I dunno, a baby opossum or something. Anyway, the only way to get that bezoar off my body was surgery and I figured as long as I was cutting, I might as well commit. But unlike this douchebag, I have full deniability because there's no photographic evidence.

It's not the fact that he shaved his pits that makes him a douche - it's the fact that he WANTS US TO KNOW that he shaved his pits that makes him a douche. Look at the pose: pit swung front, bicep cocked, JCPenney Sunday coupon circular 500 yard stare pose dead center, hottie that isn't as pretty as he is tucked in the background. Hours of practicing that pose in the mirror paid off in the flash of a camera and his reward is making us all want to tape a Chocodile to his chest and let Sally Struthers eat her way through his back to get it.
 

Looks like Manbearpig got a hold of a can of nair and went nutty!
I hope this douche gets crushed by a boulder.
I'm serial!
 

There is no way that's real. The douche's head looks twice as big as the girl's. I think someone got a little crazy with photoshop.
 

This is really disturbing. I will start with the HC. I'm 95% sure she is a really nice person, probably too nice so she doesn't hate this guy like she should.

I really hope I run acrosse this douche in real life so I can mercilessly make fun of him and dear make believe lord in the sky please let him try to fight me so I can accidentally kill him. He looks like Craig Sheffer if he were really dumb and gay. The fact that he wants to show off his shaved pits and his cheesy barbed wire armband tattoo at the same time really blows my mind. What is that on his necklace, a topaz shark's tooth? Jesus. Frosted hair and waxed eyebrows don't surprise me.

I would like to put this out there: the sunglasses in the shirt...that is a douchebag move. Sure some non douches or borderline douches do it and seemingly get away with it. But I'm calling everybody out as posers. Anyone who does that at least has douchey tendencies and may be a budding douchebag. Why the fuck can't you put them in your pocket? Because you don't get to display them in hopes everyone will sweat you, which is the founding principle behind all douchey endeavors. "Whoa, those are some cool sunglasses where have you been somewhere sunny, you must be the shit. Wait, what's that, a visible cell phone attached to your belt, a bluetooth, holy shit you must be really popular and have some important calls to take, are you James Bond?"
 

Ummm.....ewwww....

That's my response to this monstrosity.
 

@ Baron Von Goolo:

That was some funny shit; the JC Penny stare made me choke on my biscuit and then the Sally Struthers comment made me slightly incontinent....dammit, brb; gotta ditch these BVD's....
 

So, he has the time and energy to shave his pits, darken his brows and apparently apply eye liner, but no time to wash the ballsweat off his face? Ooof.

He wears his sunglasses in his shirt so they don't get scratched by the cock ring in his pocket. Duh.
 

This is bad...real bad.
 

This guy is horrid.
 

@Douchewhisle Blower Great observation on the sunglasses as he is obviously wearing Cargo shorts with multiple pockets. The shorts also have a "tied" waisteband that the bitch decided to leave un-tied and is probably not wearing a belt. Which leads one to believe this douche probably has treated his fellow party goers to a view of his underwear and/or asscrack.

I think it is fair to say that he has probably shaved his arms and legs as well.

DB1 - I need to know something. Are we in agreement that it is ok to shave your pubes? Or is it douche? What if you are very hairy? What if it makes you look bigger?

-Bagwan Singh
 

WHAT IN THE FUCKING FUCK FUCKING GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT THE FUCK??????????? I mean........ FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Well DB1, you've really done it with this one. I used to be a BaggNostic, but after this visual torture, I am now a true believer in Douchebagosity. The sunglasses in the shirt did it for me. Thanks to you DB1, now I know what Rambo would look like if he were a fag. And what's with the greasy look from the neck up? Was this photo taken right after he was bobbing for french fries? I say turn up the burners and stuff this choad into the basket and plunge his pathetic self into the hot oil until he screams like a lobster.